The life path of a Person is to Understand Yourself. How to determine your life path
The life path of a person, his unique individual life, are the subject of study of a wide range of sciences - philosophy, sociology, psychology, history, ethnography, demography, anthropology, social medicine. Even without saying that human life has always been and will be the main object of art, no matter what topics it concerns, it always views the world through the prism of a person and his life. Even in ancient times, the first attempts to create an artistic biography appeared (Plutarch, Suetonius, etc.). Although experts attribute its establishment as a special genre to the 17th century, a separation gradually occurred between the literary and artistic biographical novel (or story) and scientific historical and biographical research. Recently, there has been a certain rapprochement between them. Biography has become a full-fledged genre of historical research. Canadian historian A. Wilson rightly compared it to a piano or violin concert: through the solo of one life, its leading theme, an era is revealed.
A biographer not only describes a person’s life path, but also analyzes it. In biographical reference books and indexes, the year of birth and death of the person is usually given in parentheses after the surname separated by a dash. Sometimes the gap between them is very small, as, for example, in D. Pisarev, M. Lermontov, N. Ryleev, N. Dobrolyubov, and sometimes relatively large (L. Tolstoy, B. Shaw). It is this interval between birth and death that is usually considered to be a person’s life path.
In order to show the real fate of a person, it is necessary to find out the essence of his life path, to establish the dependence of this path on time, on the history of society, people, and country, to determine the boundaries of free choice, free life creativity.
Indeed, in any case, as we see, fate was and is now associated with that which does not depend on his free choice, is outside of him. This means that it is important, first of all, to understand whether there is something in a person’s life path that does not depend on him; if there is, then what is it and what forces determine turns in his life path that are not provided for by the free will of a person? Only by finding out this will we be able to penetrate the secrets of fate and comprehend its essence.
We, reading the biographies of great people, correctly understand and evaluate the mistakes and misconceptions in the work of our own lives. However, it is always easier to judge others; it is much more difficult to build your own life. The fact of the matter is that everyone usually has to do this on their own, without any prompting: after all, a person most often does not realize that every day, every hour he creates his life. Decisions or actions that seem insignificant, unimportant, ordinary, everyday can have far-reaching consequences that a person is not even aware of. Sometimes one action can change his entire life path.
Building your own life is incomparably more difficult than launching rockets, erecting buildings, laying canals. People who never make mistakes in foreseeing not only the immediate but also the long-term consequences of their own actions probably never existed, do not exist, and never will. Even the most talented chess player often makes mistakes in calculating the consequences of his move, and the alternatives in life are much more complex and less predictable than a chess game! The creativity of one’s own life turns out to be perhaps the most complex of all types of human creativity, and people’s life paths themselves are so confusing and tortuous...
Time and practice make it possible to understand the main, essential in the events of everyday life and separate it from the secondary. An event on which, as it seemed just yesterday, our whole life depends, today turns out to be an insignificant trifle, and what we considered a trifle sometimes turns our whole life upside down. Whether a person is reflecting on the life he has lived or recreating the biography of another person, he is distracted from the small, insignificant, selecting the most important milestones that define it. But precisely from the unimportant, and not from the accidental, for, as we will see, chance can play a very significant role in life.
What is the path of life?
An interesting definition is proposed by A.V. Gribakin, "... the path of life is a creative process of the gradual inclusion of each person in the system of social relations, a consistent change in ways of life associated with the self-realization and affirmation of individuals."
The stages of life's journey do not always coincide with the age periods of people's lives. If they really coincided, then, strictly speaking, people’s life paths would be the same, for every person goes through childhood, adolescence, adulthood and lives to old age (excluding, of course, cases of premature death).
According to Ananyev B.G., “all ages of a person exist side by side, being distributed among different individuals.”
However, age is not the only characteristic of life path. Age can be thought of as a kind of “vertical” section of a person’s life path. Moreover, its segments - childhood, youth, mature years, old age - are different, especially if people belong to opposite classes and live in different historical eras. Naturally, everyone goes through these stages, but each in their own way.
The age parameters are “superimposed” by socially significant periods of human life that depend on them, but do not coincide with them: preparation for independent work; a person’s work path and termination of work. This division does not coincide with age. For example, a young man of 16-17 years old who works at an enterprise is, in terms of the content of his life activity, closer to an adult worker than to his peer - a student who is still preparing for independent work.
The above makes it possible to define a person’s life path as a process of a person’s gradual appropriation (adequate or inadequate) of social connections and relationships, leading to his development or degradation, to actual self-realization or the inability to realize oneself in any activity. Of course, like any definition, this definition does not reveal a person’s life path in all its complexity and completeness, but it expresses its essence and can, in our opinion, become a starting point for further analysis.
Labor activity is the most important element of a person’s life path, therefore it should form the basis of his characteristics. The special importance of labor in this case is emphasized by highlighting the special concept of “human labor path”. The work path, the work biography of an individual, synthesizes the paths of human development in other spheres of social life, which have relative independence, which is determined by a number of reasons. Firstly, the path of life depends on the orientation of the individual. Research shows that workers of the same team, workshop, laboratory, etc., may have different orientations. Secondly, a person can have a good work life, bringing him joy and satisfaction, and to one degree or another fail in family life. Sometimes, on the contrary, the joys of family life or success in amateur performances and sports compensate for dissatisfaction with work. Some kind of inequality in these aspects of life’s path is probably characteristic of any person. Everything depends on the volume and intensity of personal life, on the degree of inclusion of social roles in personal life. Age-related changes also do not have the same effect on different aspects of life. For example, cessation of work due to retirement does not mean the cessation of cultural development.
Thirdly, it often happens that the greatest successes in a person’s self-realization are associated not with his professional, but with non-professional activities. For example, A.P. Borodin realized himself much more fully and with greater efficiency as a composer than as a chemist; A.P. Chekhov - as a writer, and not as a doctor. Naturally, a life path model can be considered most suitable for a given individual if it includes a harmonious combination of all spheres of life, their complementarity, successful self-realization of the individual in many of them, satisfaction of the fullness and richness of life in general.
Thus, a person’s life path turns out to be a complex interweaving of age periods and periods of social activity.
It is proposed to consider as such criteria the psychological changes that occur during the transition to the next age group, the emergence of new interests, needs, and the reorientation of value systems.
These changes are important for assessing the path of life; they are difficult to empirically analyze, because the person himself most often cannot answer when, how and due to what these changes occurred.
The path of life combines the social, event-biographical side of his life with the formation and development of his inner spiritual life and, above all, his worldview.
The formation of personality, the formation and development of personal socially significant qualities is one of the most important characteristics of the life path. But for the path of life, the state of a person’s health at certain stages of his life is also important.
A person’s life path in reality is closely connected with his way of life, because these categories serve to analyze and describe his life activity, individual human life. However, if a way of life is a characteristic of an individual’s life activity in a given period, then the life path is the development of human life over time, a consistent change in the way of life in connection with the development of the person himself, with changes in the real conditions of his life. A person's lifestyle can change significantly at different stages of their journey.
There is no consensus in the literature about what is considered the beginning of a life’s journey. B. G. Ananyev, for example, believed that it begins “much later” than birth. In some cases, entry into work is considered the beginning, omitting the entire period of preparation for activity. This view seems inaccurate. Socialization and individualization of a child begins in early childhood. Much in the formation of a person is laid down during this period, A. Tolstoy said that they raise a child until he is 5 years old, and then he has to be re-educated. Biographers rightly begin the description of a person’s life path with characteristics of the family and the conditions of a person’s upbringing. All this speaks in favor of the fact that the beginning of a person’s life journey is early childhood.
The path of each person is complex and contradictory: it combines the necessary and the accidental, the possible and the realized, the socio-historical and the personal-biographical. Their combinations are purely individual, unique for each individual.
Neither an age-based nor a psychological approach to determining a person’s life path can give positive results if it is not based on a general sociological analysis of the dependence of a person’s life path on objective conditions - on social relations and the boundaries of freedom of his active creative life determined by them.
The path of life is individual and unique for each person. But for all its uniqueness, there is always something common in the life of all representatives of a given class in the same era: such common things are social events that leave no one behind, a commonality of fundamental interests and needs.
The heroes of biographical descriptions are usually outstanding people - political and public figures, scientists, philosophers, people of art. This tradition was established in ancient times. For a long time, biographical literature was almost the only source (of course, not counting monuments and documents) from which we draw knowledge about the events of ancient years. Indeed, it is impossible to correctly understand any era without having an idea of its great people who stood at the center of the most significant historical events. Biographies of great people have invaluable educational value for the younger generation.
Such portraits of symbolic people of a certain time can be called social portraits. One of the new types of biographical research can be called an autobiographical description by a person of his life path and its main points.
A person's life path... What is it? A simple set of biographical facts or a subjective picture of the world, something predestined or mobile, changing at the will of the individual himself?
Questions that cannot be answered so easily. However, you can reflect and see what opinions scientists express about this fundamental problem.
What Science Says
The problem of the life path is studied by many disciplines: psychology, history, philosophy, biology... And of course, experts in each field suggest looking at this problem from a certain angle. For example, biologists talk about the importance of the so-called sensitive periods in human life, that is, those in which the most favorable conditions are created for the formation of certain properties and qualities of the body (for example, the period of speech development).
Sociologists note the importance of social rituals: coming of age, marriage... Indeed, after such events, as a rule, a person acquires a new set of rights and responsibilities, his attitude towards himself and the attitude of others towards him changes.
It is believed that you need to finish school, then university, work, start a family... Or are the biological stages of development the same for all organisms of the same species, which we also already mentioned? And then how to find your own, truly your own path, if everything seems to have already been decided for you?
Here another term appears - “life cycle”. It precisely includes repeating, already defined stages of development that all people must go through - biological and social stages. The first, for example, includes birth, childhood, adolescence, growing up, aging... The second includes the assimilation of a social role, its fulfillment, and then abandonment of it.
Where are we going?
- Objective events that replace each other.
- The way a person experiences the change of these events is his spiritual world.
- The results of human actions.
In general, as Buhler believed, the main force that forces a person to move along the path of life is the desire for “self-realization,” that is, the achievement of all goals, conscious or unconscious. Bühler identified stages of life's journey based on two factors - a person's age and his attitude towards goals in each period of development.
- Up to 16-20 years: before self-determination. Questions about how to find one’s path in life do not yet bother a person.
- Up to 25-30 years: activation of tendencies towards self-determination. A person searches for a suitable type of activity and chooses a life partner. Goals and plans for life are still preliminary.
- Up to 45-50 years: the culmination of self-determination. This is the time of prosperity: it is believed that it was possible to determine a professional calling and create a stable family. There are already results that can be compared with the intended goals. However, at this stage a crisis may occur. The individual may realize that the goals were not achieved or were set incorrectly.
- Up to 65-70 years: decreased tendencies towards self-determination. The psychology of personality is changing: from now on, a person is more turned back to the past, and not to the possibility of new achievements.
- From 70 years: after self-determination. A person is overcome by the desire for regularity and peace. At this stage, the individual can evaluate life as a whole.
Bühler identified the event as an elementary structural unit of life, and, as she believed, events can be objective (occurring in the external world) and subjective (in the inner world of the individual). It is interesting that a large number of the latter, according to the researcher, indicates more active attempts to find out their purpose, a stronger desire for self-determination.
K. A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya also emphasizes the individual contribution of a person. The researcher does not deny that a person is limited by society and the norms prevailing in it, but at the same time, she is able, by comparing herself with others, to find her place in the world. A special look at your own life is important - it must be considered as manageable, subject to the mind and efforts of a person.
Finding myself
Modern psychology in general notes several factors influencing a person’s life path: a certain historical period, objective events occurring during it, social norms, the actions of an individual, her internal experiences, and so on.
One way or another, it is difficult not to admit that the choice of life path largely depends on the person himself. Any periodization of life development is conditional, each approach is subjective.
For example, one can argue with the stage of old age in Bühler's concept. Yes, of course, this is a less active period compared to adulthood, but life (especially in our age) does not stop at all after 70 years. It’s the same with the very early stage: there are certain individuals who, already in adolescence, decided on plans for the rest of their lives.
Psychology can only partially help here, but competent psychological training or consultation with a specialist may suggest which direction to move in. In any case, you have started searching for an answer, which means you have set foot on a difficult, but incredibly interesting and useful path of self-improvement. And this is already great! Author: Evgenia Bessonova
Personal life strategy
Life path is the individual history of a person, its content, ideological essence. The structure of the life path includes those facts, events and actions that determine the formation of an individual as a personality.
Life Path Strategy:
It begins with a concentration of teenage dreams and fuzzy desires, plans in which the idea of one’s own future arises.
Through the choice of profession and specific life plans, a life program is implemented in which a person embodies his calling, a specific dominant goal and purpose of his life.
An active attitude towards oneself and one’s life practice allows a person to significantly consciously determine the plot and direction of one’s life path in physical, social and spiritual space-time coordinates.
By realizing his needs and motives, satisfying his interests, a person determines his life path in the course of study, communication and work.
A life strategy is a constant alignment of your personality with the character and way of your life, building a life, first based on your individual capabilities and data, and then on those that are developed in life. The life strategy consists of ways of changing, transforming conditions and situations of life in accordance with the values of the individual, defending the main thing at the cost of concessions in the private, overcoming one’s fear of losses and finding oneself.
A life strategy can be built on the basis of the idea of:
integrity;
phasing;
prospects for your life path.
Each person has his own strategy. It is an individual organization, a constant regulation of the course of life as it is carried out in a direction corresponding to the values of a given person and his individuality.
Five phases of the human life cycle (S. Buhler, 1968):
General characteristics of the life cycle phases.
- 1.1 to 16/20 - no family, profession, no life path;
- 1.2.16 /20-23/30 - preliminary self-determination, choice of a spouse;
- 1.3.23 /30-45/50 - maturity - own family, found a calling, sets specific life goals, self-realization;
- 1.4.45 /50 - 69/70 - an aging person, a difficult age of mental crisis, towards the end self-determination and setting life goals disappear;
- 1.5.69 /70. - old person, no social connections, aimless existence, focus on the past, passive expectation of death, self-completion.
Views of S. Buhler (1968) on the problem of a person’s life path:
the life of a particular person is not random, but natural, it lends itself not only to description, but also to explanation;
the main driving force of personality development is a person’s innate desire for self-realization, self-fulfillment, that is, the comprehensive realization of oneself;
a person can realize himself only through creativity and creation;
self-realization is the result of life's journey.
The theoretical background of this approach is highlighted in the works of S.L. Rubinstein (1989), B.G. Ananyeva (1980), K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya (1991), I.I. Loginova (1978) and others. In modern Western psychology, this problem was dealt with by B. Liverhood (1977), H. Thome (1983).
Life path according to S.L. Rubinstein (1989) is a movement towards perfection (aesthetic, social, psychological). For B.G. Ananyev (1980) the main characteristic of life is a person’s age. Age connects the social and biological into the main “quanta” - periods of life. In the life path, he distinguishes cognition, activity, communication through which the personality manifests itself, and several periods of life (Table 51).
Life path - the life of a person as an individual, the history of individual development (B.G. Ananyev, 1980).
Periods of life.
Manifestations of personality in the course of life:
childhood - education, training, development;
youth - training, education, communication;
maturity - professionalism, social self-determination of the individual, creating a family, carrying out socially useful activities;
old age - withdrawal from socially useful and professional activities, maintaining activity in the family sphere.
K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya (1991) highlights the problems of personal life:
correlating oneself with a variety of social conditions, forms and structures of life, its obvious and hidden principles and mechanisms, and determining one’s trajectory in them;
correlating oneself with the forms of social life in which one has to live and act, identifying one’s capabilities, and on this basis determining one’s place in these forms and structures - one of the main tasks of individual life;
separation, on the one hand, of the interest of society and the individual contribution of each person to social life, in the direction of using his abilities and, on the other hand, the creation by the individual himself of conditions for the development of his individuality.
The biggest difficulty in posing the problem of personal life is precisely to recognize it as a problem, to imagine it not as it spontaneously develops, but as it could be with a reasonable attitude to life and effort.
Life course research methods
The formation and development of life course psychology in the twentieth century led to the emergence of new ways of self-analysis of personality development during its life. Many of these methods are designated by the term “biographical” method of studying personality (from the Greek “bios” - life, “grapos” - description).
The biographical method originally arose as a literary method; its largest representative is considered to be the French critic and writer of the 19th century. Sainte-Beuve. The biographical method, understood from the point of view of not only history, but also the prospects for personal development, acquires special value, since the study of the life path becomes one of the central, key problems of modern human studies.
The term "biographical method" has different meanings. Let's note a few:
This is the use of biographical reference books and biographies, which has become widespread in psychology and the history of science, as a source of obtaining data about the personal and psychological characteristics of a person.
Using various types of personal documents (autobiographies, letters, diaries, memoirs, etc.), as well as biographical interviews and questionnaires, to analyze materials.
Using biographical analysis techniques to predict a person’s creative achievements. For example, biographical questionnaires, the main idea of which is to pose questions aimed at highlighting events, attitudes, preferences, and behavior patterns already associated with the past, which are more predictive than questions related to present events.
The meaning of the biographical method lies in the search for significant lines of personality development, highlighting the key events of this development, and establishing the relationship between them. The biographical method is implemented through:
biographical interview (eg, life choice biographical interview);
computer methods of life choice (for example, the "Persoplan" system (A.G. Shmelev); "Biograph" (A.A. Kronik); "Lifeline" (A.A. Kronik);
tests (for example, the Life Satisfaction Index test);
situational causometry (related to the problems of forecasting and studying the realism of our expectations (I.B. Kuzmina).
Hermeneutics is a method of descriptive psychology, common to the sciences of society, culture, and man, and is the art of interpreting various types of texts - literary, religious, historical, scientific, etc. An analogue of hermeneutics in objective psychology is the method of analyzing the products of activity. There is a broad understanding of hermeneutics, which includes the understanding and interpretation of any texts. Moreover, the entire totality of human experience as a whole can act as a “text”. This experience can be presented both in various kinds of texts and in other products of material and spiritual culture. In psychology, these can be stories, autobiographies, drawings, actions, behavior, etc. Thus, psychological hermeneutics is the art and theory of interpreting and understanding psychological experience. The hermeneutics method is used among the methods of descriptive psychology to study and describe the life path of an individual.
Signs of stunted personal growth
Personal growth is spontaneous changes that occur in a person’s inner world and are expressed in constructive mastery of the environment, socially beneficial development and cooperation with people.
Personal growth involves:
expansion of zones of self-awareness (F. Perls);
full awareness of real life “here and now”;
choosing a decision on how to live in the present moment;
taking responsibility for your choices.
Personal growth is a contradictory process, with many obstacles along the way. The main contradiction in personal growth comes from the dual nature of man. A serious obstacle to personal growth can be the contradiction between the desire for love and recognition from the outside and the natural need for activity and self-realization of one’s own aspirations. Personal growth requires constant changes, re-evaluation of previous experience at each new stage of one’s development.
Personal growth is a complex dialectical process, in order to resolve the contradictions of which each person needs in his life to be able to:
understand and accept yourself, your individuality, because by getting to know yourself, a person gains true freedom and independence;
determine your place in life among other people, because by connecting with people, a person receives their love and support;
find the value and meaning of your life, your unique purpose, bearing responsibility for it, because this is the main goal of personal growth.
Pathogenic mechanisms that interfere with personality development are as follows:
passive position in relation to reality;
repression and other ways of protecting the “I”: projection, replacement, distortion of the true state of affairs for the sake of internal balance and tranquility.
Psychological and social factors contribute to personality degradation. Stages of personality degradation:
- 1) the formation of a “pawn” psychology, a global sense of one’s dependence on other forces (the phenomenon of “learned helplessness”);
- 2) creation of a shortage of goods, as a result, the primary needs for food and survival become leading;
- 3) creating “purity” of the social environment - dividing people into “good” and “bad”; “us” and “strangers”, creating guilt and shame for oneself;
- 4) the creation of a cult of “self-criticism”, recognition even of those disapproved acts that a person has never committed;
- 5) preservation of the “sacred foundations” (it is forbidden to even think or doubt the fundamental premises of ideology);
- 6) formation of a specialized language (complex problems are compressed into short, very simple, easy to remember expressions).
As a result of all these factors, an “unreal existence” becomes habitual for a person, since from a complex, contradictory, uncertain real world a person moves into an “unreal world of clarity, simplicity”; he forms several “I”s, functionally isolated from each other.
Signs of stunted personal growth:
non-acceptance of oneself;
intrapersonal conflict;
unproductive personal orientations;
violation of internal harmony, balance between the individual and the environment;
closedness to new experiences;
narrowing of the boundaries of the “I”;
orientation to external values and guidelines (discrepancy between the real and ideal self);
lack of flexibility, spontaneity;
narrowing zones of self-awareness;
failure to accept responsibility for one’s existence, etc.
Personal defense mechanisms
Defense mechanisms are a special kind of mental activity, implemented in the form of specific techniques for processing information, which can prevent the loss of self-esteem and avoid the destruction of the unity of the “self-image”. Mostly, psychological defense is destructive in nature (Table 52).
Let us characterize the most frequently “working” psychological defense mechanisms, both identified in psychoanalysis and described by other researchers (F.V. Bassin, F.E. Vasilyuk, R.M. Granovskaya, I.S. Kon).
Denial is defined as the process of eliminating, ignoring traumatic perceptions of external reality. This defense mechanism reveals itself in conflicts associated with the emergence of motives that destroy the basic attitudes of the individual; with the emergence of information that threatens self-preservation, prestige, and self-respect. The basic formula of negation: “there is no danger, this does not exist”; “I don’t see, I don’t hear,” etc. In everyday life, such a mechanism is referred to as the “ostrich position” (for example, the reaction to the message of a serious diagnosis of a disease is denial, disbelief in it).
Psychological defense mechanisms
Repression is a mechanism for getting rid of internal conflict by eliminating an unacceptable motive or unwanted information from consciousness. The phenomena of forgetting something are very often associated with repression. For example, facts that are especially inconvenient for us are easily forgotten.
Projection is the process of attributing (transferring) one’s own feelings, desires and personal traits, which a person does not want to admit to himself because of their unacceptability, to another person. Thus, a stingy person tends to notice greed in other people, an aggressive person - cruelty, etc. A person who constantly attributes his own unseemly motives to others is called a hypocrite.
Identification is a defense mechanism in which a person sees another in himself and transfers to himself the motives and qualities inherent in another person. There is also a positive aspect to identification - it is a mechanism for assimilating social experience. The emotional empathy of the viewer or reader with the characters of a work of art is based on the identification mechanism. As a defense mechanism, identification is used when an individual involuntarily fully or partially becomes like another in order to avert his own desires or associated ideas and affects that cause fear. For example, an eight-year-old girl who would like to play with her friends, but has not yet done her homework, is identifiably adopting the behavior of her father, who spends a long time every day at his desk.
Regression is a defense mechanism through which the subject seeks to avoid internal anxiety and lose self-esteem in conditions of increased responsibility using those methods of behavior that were adequate at earlier stages of development. Regression is a person’s return from higher forms of behavior to lower ones. Infantility in behavior and relationships is a striking phenomenon of regression.
Reactive formations are a protective mechanism for transforming a traumatic motive into its opposite. For example, unaccountable, without reasonable grounds, hostility towards a person can turn into special consideration towards him, through which the subject tries to overcome his own aggressive feelings, and, on the contrary, often sympathy for a person can be demonstrated in forms characteristic of a hostile attitude.
Rationalization is the attribution of logical or plausible reasons to behavior, the motives of which are unacceptable or unknown, as an excuse to others or to oneself for one’s inadequacy. In particular, rationalization is associated with an attempt to reduce the value of the unaffordable. This mechanism is also called “green grapes” (after the famous fable by I.A. Krylov “The Fox and the Grapes”).
Substitution is a protective mechanism associated with the transfer of action from an inaccessible object to an accessible one. Substitution discharges the tension created by an unrealized need, an unattainable goal.
Isolation, or alienation, is the isolation and localization of traumatic factors within a person’s consciousness. Access to consciousness to traumatic feelings is blocked, so that the connection between a certain event and its emotional coloring is not reflected in consciousness. The phenomena of “split personality” may be associated with such protection. As clinical data testify, the milker embodies what is alien to the first “I”; in this case, different “I” may not know anything about each other.
Sublimation. The relationship of sublimation to defense mechanisms is controversial: some psychoanalysts consider sublimation to be a defense mechanism, but emphasize that it is, moreover, an individual criterion of a special type of maturity; it leads to the fact that the individual renounces the immediate and direct satisfaction of drives and, the energy released in this case, becomes available to the “I” for cultural activity.
Manifestations of psychological defense:
in a person’s actions to maintain a habitual opinion about himself,
in actions to reject or change information perceived as unfavorable and destroying basic ideas about oneself or others.
Defense mechanisms were first identified by S. Freud (1989); their special study is associated with the name of his daughter - A. Freud (1993).
Human life is a continuous movement. The line along which a person moves is the path of life. It consists of events that happen over a lifetime. In other words, it can be called fate. Each person has his own destiny, which he builds himself. Some people believe that nothing depends on them and go with the flow of life, maybe this is so, because there is no confirmation or refutation of this. In any case, a person makes a certain contribution to his destiny. Well, for people who want to choose their own path in life, a few tips will help.
If you want to choose a path in life and not make mistakes, you will have to give yourself the right to make mistakes, because without trying, it is impossible to understand whether it is right for you or not. In addition, life goals can change with age and there is nothing surprising if this question interested you at 30, 40 or 60 years old - the path of life can change several times in life, because only those who do not develop do not change.
We should not forget about ancient teachings, no matter how strange they may seem. If you pay attention to some exotic stories, you will notice that the person himself has nothing to do with the choice of his destiny. It is formed long before his birth.
Stress has a negative impact on the choice of life path, since a person in an uncertain state will not be able to concentrate and make the right choice. An irritated person is very unbalanced, so his opinion is not confident and inaccurate. Depression not only worsens the nervous system, but also negatively affects one’s life position.
The choice of life path directly depends on your mood, so you need to smile more often and look positively at all current situations. Even from the slightest joy you need to be able to “squeeze out” all the pleasure. If something does not go according to plan, it is worth remembering the proverb: everything that is not done is for the better.
Almost every person is familiar with the phrase: if you repeat a thought often, it will come true. Maybe that's true. This option should not be excluded. If a person wants something, thinks about it, moves towards its realization, then it must come true. People do everything to fulfill their desires, and only the confident and purposeful manage to fulfill them.
But we should not exclude the possibility that a person chooses his own path in life. After all, he commits actions that later decide his fate. Also, those around us make a significant contribution to a person’s destiny. They can both positively and negatively influence his development, help him choose a position in life, or vice versa.
When choosing his life path, a person sets himself a goal, which he approaches throughout his life. The main thing is to set this goal correctly and not give up under any circumstances. It's important to never stop. This is the only way to achieve success.
How to choose a path in life and not make a mistake
The search for the meaning of life has concerned people for many centuries. But neither the great sages, nor philosophers, nor ordinary people could give an answer to this question. In life, we constantly have to make choices: profession, university, place of work, spouse. How to find your path in life so that after many years you don’t have the feeling that your life was lived in vain.
First of all, decide what exactly you want from life. This could be a strong, friendly family, a fast-paced and successful career, monotonous everyday life devoid of strong emotions, or, conversely, a life full of passions and dangerous adventures.
Sometimes we simply follow the wishes of others (for example, parents), who determine our destiny for us. It is not right. Every person has the right to make their own choices and mistakes. Intervention, even from a stranger, can cause significant harm to the psyche and self-esteem. The habit of shifting responsibility for your life to others cannot lead to anything good.
To choose a path in life and not make a mistake, decide for yourself what exactly gives you pleasure. Perhaps this is what will push you on the right path in life. Perhaps you enjoy drawing, or playing music, or communicating with children, maybe you like to heal people or simply do good deeds. This will be a hint on how to find your path in life.
Try to spend as much time as possible on what you love. Do not put duty above your own interests, as you can forever give up your happiness.
Take risks, do stupid things, don’t be afraid to change your life. Open your life to something new.
Which movie or literary character most appeals to you, with whom do you associate yourself? To choose a path in life and not make a mistake, select several options; this will help you establish what you really want from life.
Don't give in to problems. Overcoming obstacles will only strengthen you on the difficult path to your intended goal.
And remember, it's never too late to change your path in life. Even if at the age of sixty you realized that your life does not suit you at all, and you were doing the wrong thing, you should not despair. It's never too late to change yourself, and by changing, we ourselves change the world around us.
And finally, do not forget about your loved ones, because their fate is inextricably linked with yours, therefore, they are not at all indifferent to what path in life you have chosen for yourself. And if somewhere, in something you made a mistake and regret it, do not be afraid to admit your mistake and move forward.
How to find your creative path
Sometimes it seems to us that all talented people absorbed talent with their mother’s milk and spend absolutely no effort to achieve creative heights. This is not entirely true, every talented person is talented in his own way, and it takes years of hard work to develop natural abilities. How to find your creative path? Undoubtedly, every person has talent, but how to find it?
We can live and not suspect the existence of talent in ourselves, which is why we do not realize the creative abilities and energy inherent in us by nature. It is very good if parents direct their child on a creative path from childhood, engage in aesthetic education, and send him to an art or music school. It is easier for teachers to figure out what the child is most inclined to.
If the development of creative abilities in childhood was not given enough attention, talent can sleep for quite a long time. How to understand that you have not realized your creative potential.
The first sign of the need for creativity is boredom. Everyday activities do not bring you pleasure, but you are also reluctant to do anything else. In this case, you need to realize your internal resources and determine what kind of creativity you are inclined towards.
There are several methods on how to find your creative path.
You need to remember what you were interested in as a child, what business brought you joy and pleasure. Throw out of your head thoughts about the profitability of this business, just enjoy the process. A new hobby will be a wonderful relaxation and fill your life with energy and happiness.
If the first method does not help, try turning to your subconscious. Psychologists say that in our subconscious you can find the answer to almost any question, you just need to ask it correctly and hear the answer. Take a comfortable position, relax and look inward. Mentally ask a question that concerns you. Don't expect an answer right away. It may arise as an idea or thought a few days later.
If the previous two options did not bring results, you should use this technique. To choose your creative path and not make mistakes, just watch the people who surround you and note for yourself what you admire or simply like. Write down all the things that interest you, and after a while, look through the notes you made and choose what exactly you would like to devote your time to.
Do not give up in the face of difficulties; only through hard work can you achieve mastery.
Walt Disney received 302 rejections before finding investors for the animation studio. Oprah Winfrey grew up so poor that she had no toys as a child. If all great people believed that their path in life depended on circumstances, we certainly would not have heard their names. But they continued to act “in spite” because they knew: if there is 1% to change their life, it must be changed.
What is a life path
Life path is a multicomponent concept that consists of internal biological (genotype, character, talent and life experience) and external social (upbringing, environment, events) factors. It also includes other concepts: the meaning of life, life philosophy, life cycle. The description of the life path begins at the moment of a person’s birth and ends on the day of his death.
Although there is no exact scientific definition of the life path yet, scientists are studying it. Academician S.L. Rubinstein, back in the 20s of the last century, considered a person from a biographical point of view, since he considered a person’s personality inseparable from his personal experience. And at the same time, Doctor of Philosophy Charlotte Bühler introduced the concept of “personal life path,” consisting of five phases of development according to the years of life.
But while scientists are conducting their research, I want to find answers to the questions for myself: can I choose? Is it in my power to change something? How does my path fit with my inner values? How to set your life priorities?
How to determine your life path
Let's start with an example. You love to travel and your friend loves to travel. You choose a tour operator, expensive all-inclusive hotels and excursions along tourist routes in advance. Your friend buys a ticket, packs his suitcase at the last minute, lives in a tent and runs around abandoned villages with a camera.
This is how it is with life: consciously or unconsciously, we choose roads, routes and methods of transportation, and we get different emotions from this. And we choose the way to understand our life path ourselves. Some go to fortune tellers and astrologers, some look for a spiritual mentor, some try to understand the issue with the help of books and self-awareness.
Religious figures, astrologers, philosophers, historians, ethnographers and doctors of social medicine work to determine the path of life. Geneticists are also struggling with this. And according to their research, 57-60% of us are our genes. This means that we can easily change the rest ourselves. And the first thing you need to do is determine your life priorities.
How to set life priorities
Don't get too carried away when prioritizing. There is a risk of turning into another superman, looking at the clock even during sex. But even without conscious priorities, life becomes chaos, and things go left to chance. Therefore, let's try to choose a middle ground so that we can do everything, but at the same time remember the taste of the salad eaten at lunch.
Understand and realize how priorities in life are set today
Even if you have never drawn a priority scale, you have them. Everything we have at this moment is the result of our priorities. Consciously or unconsciously, it doesn’t matter. Everything we want or dream about is theory. All we have right now is practice and our real priorities.
Unconsciously we prioritize not what is needed or useful, but what is important. If we are lying on the sofa, it is important for us to lie on the sofa. If we get up for a run in the morning, it is important for us to run in the morning. We lie on the sofa and think about going for a run - it is important for us to lie on the sofa, pretending to be concerned about our health.
Recognizing your priorities “as they are” is about starting an honest conversation with yourself. Don’t go aside, don’t put on a smart face, don’t think. Honestly describe what you own at this moment: family, work, income, health, habits. This is your starting point.
Check how well priorities correspond to internal values
Values are the desires of the soul; they come from within. Priorities are often externally imposed. And that's the problem. When values and priorities are at odds, nothing good happens. The gap between “what is important to me” and “what SHOULD be important to me” leads to low mood, anxiety and depression.
Children, especially small ones, are the first indicator of our values. If parents do not read, no amount of persuasion or instruction will force the child to read. The same goes for exercise, proper nutrition, and goals in life. If you want to know your true values, watch your children.
The second indicator of our values is our energy. When the energy of priorities and values works in one direction, what scientists call resonance occurs, and we call it a white streak in life. Follow your energy rather than fuel it with caffeine or entertainment.
Understand that the list of priorities is not dimensionless and accept it
Imagine that your list of priorities can only consist of 10 items and you have already added all 10 to it. Are you thinking of adding another one to the list? This means that something will have to be given up. Because it is impossible to combine health with smoking, comfort with a career, high earnings with an eternal vacation in the Maldives in one life.
Giving up something will help correctly set goal. Before you put it out, think about how you want to feel. Do you want to be in harmony, in peace or in an eternal race with obstacles? Form goals that will help you achieve the desired state. Then they will come from the heart, and not from the concept of “this is how it should be.” Who really needs it?
Dividing them into urgent and non-urgent will help you determine your priorities correctly. Urgent matters take up a lot of energy, but are rarely important. Things that don't have a deadline are more likely to achieve their intended goal. This prioritization will help determine what we want to spend time on and what we must spend it on.
Don't live for a resume or reference
Why do we constantly live in conflict between outer success and inner worth? The external “must, need, need” clogs the airwaves so much that your own feelings no longer have a chance to break through. This is probably why, even when alone with ourselves, we talk about life in such words as if we were undergoing an interview with a strict personnel officer.
Need to distinguish personal qualities and your virtues. The former help to gain a place in the sun in the labor market. The second is what makes us human. Is how we build a family, relationships with friends, and life outside of work much more important? Then why do we devote so little time to these qualities, and are often even ashamed of them?
The New York Times held a competition for the best essay on happiness. The results were amazing: many people dream not of accomplishments, but of a “small happy life.” Of course, such a life is not suitable for everyone. But there is something inexpressibly beautiful and reliable in this, something that returns us to our real values.
Include leisure and hobbies in your list of priorities
On the list of priorities, hobbies are often listed last. But these are the things that make us happy. Do you want to become happy, not just efficient? Be sure to include a hobby on your list and devote time to it every day.
How to find your hobby, if there is nothing interesting? Start looking. Attend master classes, go to exhibitions, even if the mere mention of painting makes you want to faint. Communication with passionate people will help you understand that you can also make money from your hobby.
A hobby should not be treated as an activity for life. In the same way, you cannot predetermine whether you can later build a career on your hobby. Man is a conductor. He needs to receive emotions from beauty and throw them out in the form of creativity. Perhaps later you will actually be able to make money from your hobby, but there are no guarantees for this.
Fatalists believe that everything is determined at birth, optimists hope for the best. But realists know: it is impossible to determine the path of life today and wake up tomorrow as an absolutely happy person. The path is a process; it can be adjusted at every stage of life. There would be a desire.
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