4 life strategy how to build it. Life strategy for success

Cattle or not cattle - that is the question.

The article, of course, is not about rednecks at all - in the sense that usually has a negative connotation in circulation and is even used as a curse word. About the mental phenomenon denoted by the word "redneck" happened on this site. I use this word to mean - as a symbol of a state that does not require creative motivation in people who are not particularly annoyed dissatisfaction with existing(I don’t presume to say to what extent it is predetermined hereditarily). Yes, this word has a sad, anti-evolutionary connotation... However, the word "redneck" implies one of the most common poles of personal strategies in life.

Speaking about the scope of applicability of the concept, it is worth noting that evolution, seething with the desire to change something, is not always justified in certain conditions close to the optimum for a given species. Cats are cute and wonderful even without creativity :) although playful, creative adventurers are much more interesting to many.

I will also clarify that the word “creativity” is not taken in its common sense. We can conditionally distinguish three levels of involvement of creativity mechanisms. The first is a search of memories with predictive dream-like visions of possible rosy (or harsh) pictures, the second is based on the first, but with the inclusion of skills in developing new options - as if an intermediate level of creativity, and the third - on the basis of the second, but with the motivation to realize these creative fantasies for transmission to society.

In more detail: The first level is the mode of predictive promotion of significant plots or the dream mode - pure fantasy, remaining to itself, with all its inadequacies. In this variant, emerging new and significant plots are determined by the current contexts of chains of experiences, the overlap of which can create new combinations. This is passive creativity - in the sense that it does not require the active involvement of a generator of new ideas. These options can be actually tested in suitable situations.
The second level is not just passive motivational subjective fantasies, but the acquired skills of finding new desired options are connected to them. This, too, can remain a subjective fantasy and pile up into thoughts that are increasingly far from reality, or maybe, under suitable conditions, it can be tried for real, but remaining personal subjective skills. A person remains a thing in itself and, having given away his skates, takes everything he has with him to nowhere.
The third level involves efforts to formalize one's ideas in order to communicate personal predictions to others. This is vital creativity, which, with sufficient demand, remains relevant for some time in the collective consciousness of society.
It must be said that all three levels influence the people around them in one way or another, since they observe what is the manifestation of these ideas: the behavior of a person - the bearer of the idea. It affects the people around you, who, in turn, spread it further.
But only in the third version do ideas have as much wider influence as the generally shared symbols in the formalized form of the idea allow this. Of course, communication using verbal symbols is much more extensive.

Even from the point of view of storing for future use the skills of a more universal adaptability developed through creativity, the benefit is quite controversial: it is impossible to foresee everything, and there is a certain harm in self-improvement without an urgent need. So the cattle should not be indiscriminately condemned - they occupy their own, perhaps very important, stabilizing niche in society. Moreover, even the most caringly ebullient ones are not always creators, but in many situations and moments they fit the criteria of rednecks, and some creators would be better off being rednecks in view of the destructiveness of the results of their efforts for society. But no one can tell in advance what evil can turn into good and vice versa...

Everyone cannot and should not be the same and, accordingly, they play those social roles for which they have managed to adapt. Only in a limited area of ​​mutual understanding are people united by a common culture. To a much greater extent, they relatively stably belong to different subcultures and more local enclaves from the circle of those closest to them to the circle of interests determined by personal life strategy. This was determined in the early stages of personality formation.

An example of the specific influence of something generally shared in culture, which is set in the early stages of development, is visible in the article Life Strategies of Modern Youth:

As data from recent sociological studies show, parental attitudes are dominated by an orientation toward conformist values ​​( ability to behave in public, honesty, neatness, obedience to parents, good grades and behavior at school) and, to a much lesser extent, focus on the development of internal regulators of children’s behavior (responsibility, sensitivity and attentiveness to people, curiosity, self-control). This orientation of parents towards transmitting conformist values ​​to their children to the detriment of the development of their internal regulators of behavior makes adolescents highly dependent on the environment in which they find themselves., which in the conditions of unstable Russian society especially increases the likelihood of deviant behavior.

In parallel with the active advertising of clearly inflated living standards, the idea is being promoted that poverty is the result of a person’s personal shortcomings: laziness, unprofessionalism, inflexibility, lack of initiative... Therefore, it is a shame to be poor! As a result, public opinion has formed the idea that society is divided into successful people, that is, those who have money (primarily entrepreneurs and criminals) and everyone else (that is, the poor and, therefore, unsuccessful).... The specificity of the Russian situation is that previously quite socially prosperous people, among whom there were many specialists with higher education, found themselves on the verge of poverty and below it.

See Ayn Rand's critique of Atlas Shrugged.

The most common life strategy of the younger generation - obtaining an education that leads to a financial profession, and a comfortable personal life - is built in order to achieve maximum independence, complete freedom, the opposite of any restrictions, any “dependencies”. Essentially, this life strategy is formulated as follows: “I want to have a good education and a well-paid job so that I don’t have to depend on anyone.” In other words, I enter the social world (study, earn, work) because I want to free myself from society and even from my family (“not to depend on anyone!”), not to be connected with anything or anyone, “to do, what I want"...It is obvious that the current model of success, fueled by the dream of unlimited freedom, is nothing more than a utopia. At the same time, it is a natural reaction to the fear of the criminalization of society and the ever-increasing gap between the rich (“businessmen”) and the poor (“everyone else”).

Like any act of adaptation of a person to something new using the mechanisms of consciousness, the process of choice and the correct choice of a life strategy presupposes a personal assessment of the result: how much the desired turns out to be in accordance with the expected. In other words, in the most general terms, since we are talking about strategy, the main role is played by the assessment of satisfaction with the existing, in the most general terms - satisfaction with life.

And here there is an important point: such an assessment, as well as the general tendency to overestimate or underestimate the value of the results of one’s behavior, depends on the specifics of the value system of a particular person. It is easy to see in principle that those who tend to overestimate the positivity of the results of their activities are more easily satisfied with what they have achieved, and that is where they stop their efforts, stopping the process of adapting to the new. They easily assess the result as quite acceptable; the assessment may have such a low threshold of satisfaction with the result that their system of ideas tends to justify even failures with some of their own explanations (which always happens when there is a very important Idea or a fixed idea, but the ease of positive assessment is not always has a reason for such an idea).

Here are some illustrative statements.

Anxiety is dissatisfaction, and dissatisfaction is the primary condition for progress.. (Thomas Edison)

Dissatisfaction is a source of not only suffering, but also progress in the lives of individuals and entire nations.. (Erich Auerbach)

The main properties of his character are eternal dissatisfaction and constant obstinacy - not onlystimulated Lomonosovmove forward towards discoveries, but quite often created problems and troubles on the path to enlightenment.

In Scott Miller's book, Chapter 13 Life Satisfaction:

One popular topic in the psychology of aging has been called variously: “morale,” “subjective well-being,” “life satisfaction,” or simply “happiness.” We are talking about a question of great importance: how satisfied is a person with his life?

Many studies have been aimed at solving this problem using LSI And SWLS and similar techniques.

Marital status is also associated with life satisfaction; Those who are married have higher overall life satisfaction scores than those who are widowed or divorced.... Perhaps the most interesting result concerns the relationship between activity level and life satisfaction. A number of studies have found that this relationship is positive - that is, older people who lead an active lifestyle are more satisfied with their lives than those whose activity levels are reduced.

It can be assumed that such a pronounced connection between dissatisfaction and progress was evolutionarily embodied in the inherited predisposition of some people to dissatisfaction with existing things, since this is a powerful adaptive factor in human evolution. However, the hypertrophy of such a quality can turn into a disaster for society, and therefore the manifestations of excessive dissatisfaction, expressed in specific actions, should also be somehow evolutionarily limited. Perhaps such a limiter is a conservative predisposition to cattle existence, which can be defended very actively.

In any case, it can be stated that in society there is a balance of those who are predisposed to active dissatisfaction and those who are predisposed to conservatism. The first ensure progress, they have more developed adaptive systems, they are keen researchers. The latter prevent all innovations that are uncomfortable for them and alarming. The former are more often great heroes and great villains, they are in full swing with life because only this gives their life meaning, to some extent satisfies. They need socially relevant activity that fills their lives with meaning. The latter can easily be satisfied without much social activity, by communicating with loved ones or in an enclave of interests. But in general, no one can be without social activity - this leads to severe depression.

From the article Studying the main characteristics of a person’s life strategy:

By life strategy we mean a way of being, a system of values ​​and goals, the implementation of which, according to a person’s ideas, makes his life more effective. In other words, it is the art of leading your own life.

The problem of life strategy is closely related to the eternal problem of the meaning of life, and if the first answers the question of how to live, then the second answers the question of what to live for.

The main indicators of the effectiveness of a person’s life strategy are his life satisfaction and mental health.

...The results of this study indicate that people with higher levels of meaningfulness in life and the general level of subjective control, as a rule, choose and implement a way of life that underlies the life strategy of creativity, i.e. consciously or unconsciously take the position of an active creator of their life and rely on such values ​​as love, beauty, creativity, goodness, development. They are satisfied with their lives and have higher rates of mental health.

A. Adler notes that the formation of life goals begins in childhood as compensation for feelings of inferiority, uncertainty and helplessness in the adult world. A life goal is formed in early childhood under the influence of personal experience, values, and characteristics of the individual himself. It is in childhood, in his opinion, that a life style is formed - an integrated style of adaptation to life and interaction with it. A. Adler calls love, friendship and work the main life tasks that a person faces, which are determined by the conditions of human existence and allow him to maintain and develop life in the environment in which he finds himself.

Domestic psychologists identify three main types of life strategies: a strategy of well-being, a strategy of life success and a strategy of self-realization. These types are based on more generalized ideas about what people generally strive for in life. The content of these strategies is determined by the nature of the individual’s social activity. Thus, receptive (“consumer”) activity is the basis of the strategy of life well-being. A prerequisite for a strategy for success in life is, first of all, motivational (“achievement”) activity, which is designed for public recognition. A striking example of this, as defined by the authors, is entrepreneurship. The strategy of self-realization is characterized by creative activity. In life, there are, rather, mixed types: we all, but to varying degrees, strive for well-being, success and self-realization, and for different scales of implementation of these strategies.

American psychologists distinguish two groups of life strategies based on the predominance of internal and external aspirations. Extrinsic aspirations, the value of which depends on other people, are based on values ​​such as material well-being, social recognition, and physical attractiveness. Internal aspirations are based on the values ​​of personal growth, health, love, affection, and service to society.

A creative strategy is a way of being in which a person, consciously or unconsciously, takes the position of an active creator of his life, based on values ​​such as love, beauty, goodness, development, i.e. making choices in favor of mental and spiritual health.

People who have a lower level of subjective control are not used to being responsible for their lives, they do not feel the strength to influence the course of their lives, they live by the principle of “having” (according to E. Fromm), unlike those who strive "to be" many.

The most common, intuitively professed attitude in the motivations of those who are completely satisfied with life is the desire to receive pleasure. In conditions of low demands in assessing one’s own behavior, this becomes the main justification for even clearly inadequate actions that require some kind of justification to eliminate the negative discrepancy between what is expected and what is received. In relation to those who do not demonstrate this, “workaholics”, researchers, passionate creators of all kinds, the often asked question arises: “How do you relax?”

The pursuit of pleasure - as a goal, at its very core can be the context of a life strategy and, accordingly, the possibilities for achieving such goals - are very diverse and, most often, quite accessible. Of course, the need for a preparation stage is recognized and accepted, a stage of necessary effort to accumulate potential, which can be turned into pleasure. But in the most unassuming cases, this is realized by the traditional “delay” from Friday evenings and on weekends, relaxation on vacation and holidays in completely traditional and familiar ways, complemented by accessible exoticism.

In general, a confident impression is created: everything towards which efforts are directed, all emerging tasks and goals have one basis of motivation: obtaining final pleasure, joy, in the most general form - a feeling of happiness.

Such ideas are so deeply rooted that if a person does not receive the dose regulated for him in certain cases, then this seriously worries him, even to the point of the word “loser” spinning in his head.

If this were true, then the problem of immersing humanity in the nirvana of happiness becomes easily solvable because there are very effective technical ways to achieve a happy state of any conceivable strength and duration, and this will end the meaning of the existence of any person. If we imagine that everyone has been given happiness buttons and all they need to do is poke them, which is technically feasible today, then by the beginning of the next day the planet Earth will be completely freed from the environmental problems of lost humanity.

In fact, the feeling of happiness and unhappiness are functionally equal and equally necessary assessments of what is happening to a person, which allows one to learn to avoid the bad and strive for the good. The concepts of good and bad are fundamentally individual, they depend on the current state of the system of significance of the individual, and no one except the individual himself can give a correct assessment of them in these conditions.

A happy state marks successful actions, an unhappy state marks something that has not yet been achieved. In the first case, you don’t have to think about it anymore, but simply use the successful recipe of action that you have found, which becomes habitual; in the second, everything depends on your personal threshold of pretension, on the motivating force of dissatisfaction.

Everyone has such a threshold: starting from a certain predictable complexity with a given strength of need, the search for ways to solve the problem is postponed, and something that is not sure of the outcome is not carried out. This threshold is developed through personal life experience and, just like any skill, depends on the specific conditions.

This is a very important type of personal knowledge: in which situations to intervene, and in which it is better not to participate. And, like any knowledge, it is impossible to transfer to another directly, in the form of information. When a person is not sure of the outcome, feeling what failure might threaten, and another persistently shouts: “Jump, you coward! There are only six meters! When you fall, group yourself and everything will be fine!!”, then the second person will not be able to take advantage of it so easily automatisms of other people's reactions that he developed for himself. He has never grouped at all in his life, and by jumping, he can gain his experience at too high a price, but without really learning the correct action. What is the best way to act in such critical situations?.. In the article About dangers:

What is done confidently, without thinking, automatically, is the most well-practiced experience. It gives the most expected, positive results and the least risk. And something that requires thought and is not confident enough gives a high risk of an unsuccessful outcome. Here is the criterion: If you think about it and are not sure enough, be especially careful and, if possible, take your time.
If you come to a log through a stormy river, this is not new to you and does not cause you to think, then go without thinking and, most likely, everything will be fine. Otherwise, you should think very carefully about a safer option for passing, for example, not on your feet, but sitting, moving further and further along the log.
General strategy: if you have time and the situation is uncertain, think as best you can. But when there is no time left, you need to act, then do it without thinking, like a ram jumping on rocks, confidently and automatically - this will give the highest chance of success. Then all that remains is to rely on the lottery of fate...

By this point, it should already become clear to what extent the correctness of the choice of life strategy is determined by an understanding of how the individual adapts to the environment. Thus, it turns out that the popular idea that one should strive for a happy state - as an end in itself - is a mechanism turned inside out: how the accumulation of personal experience is organized through a positive or negative assessment of the results of an attempt at action. It turns out that in order to remain in harmony with others, you need to strive not for happiness at all costs and preferably in a pure, unclouded form, but for the success of your actions, which is accompanied by a feeling of joy in getting what you want. And dissatisfaction or annoyance from failure should not be considered as in any case unacceptable, because then you will never learn how to hammer nails, ride a bike, defeat an opponent, or anything else at all, because any learning is inevitably based on trial errors and finding ways to adjust them towards the desired result.

The way to be as close as possible to the main streams of social life and at the same time remain an original personality, and not an appendage of someone else’s will, inevitably turns out to be the need to develop a fairly effective basic system of understanding - a worldview. On this basis, it becomes possible for the socially active part of people to form an original influence in society - in the area of ​​their specialization.

A person, living in society, constantly faces many demands placed on him from parents, teachers, friends, strangers, etc. Each person, in turn, has his own needs, desires, and interests that he strives to realize. In real life circumstances, there is often a clash between the objective demands of reality and the needs of the individual, which gives rise to various kinds of life contradictions. The degree of integration of life requirements with the needs, interests, and values ​​of the individual leads to the formation of various life strategies.

In foreign and domestic psychology, the number of works devoted to the consideration of life strategy and its varieties is limited. This aspect was studied in detail by K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya and R. Pehunen as part of a study of the issue of a person’s life path.

In a broad sense, K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya gives the following definition of life strategy - it is “a fundamental ability of an individual, realized in various life conditions and circumstances, to connect his individuality with the conditions of life, to reproduce and develop it.” In a narrow sense, it is the development of a specific life solution to overcome life’s contradictions.

In his works, R. Pehunen notes that a life strategy is developed by the individual. Personality in this regard is divided into three subsystems based on the vital function performed - control, action and feedback systems. Each of the subsystems is responsible for different aspects of life strategy.

Control system regulates the goal-setting characteristics of life strategy:

Ø having an idea about your future;

Ø avoidance or desire for it;

Ø degree of hierarchy of life goals;

Ø externality/internality of the locus of control over one’s own life;

Ø the presence of a time perspective (connection between the past, present and future);

Ø range of life interests;

Ø external/internal orientation of goals.

Action system responsible for achieving life goals.

Ø level of planning of actions to achieve set goals;

Ø rigidity/plasticity in the use of means of achievement;

Ø specificity of establishing social contacts and activities in general.

Feedback system characterizes the degree of openness in expressing emotions of success or failure.

As a basis for the classification of life strategies, R. Pehunen proposes to consider the way in which an individual resolves emerging life conflicts between the demands and opportunities of the social environment and the individual’s habitual way of life. Based on the above, Pehunen identifies two general types of life strategies: at the stage of detecting a conflict and at the stage of overcoming it.

In the stage of conflict detection, a person, according to the author, is capable of demonstrating defensive strategies of two subtypes: conservatism and avoidance. The essence of a conservative strategy lies in the individual’s desire to maintain a familiar way of life, not paying attention to changing external conditions. A conservative life strategy has a reluctance and inability to change in new conditions of life, a clear and rigid hierarchy of life goals, punctuality in performing daily activities, and limited life interests.

The avoidance strategy manifests itself either in increased activity of the individual in less conflicting areas (active avoidance) or in isolation (passive avoidance). A person with such a strategy tends to perceive the future as a threat and the unknown, which leads to inconsistency in life goals that do not take into account the real capabilities of the individual. In the time perspective, there is a predominance of the present with a focus on satisfying one’s own needs. The emotional sphere is characterized by a predominance of depression and anxiety.

After a person has discovered a life conflict, Pehunen believes, he is able to demonstrate one of three subtypes of life strategies that characterize the person’s behavior in a difficult life situation:

Ø Refusal strategy;

Ø Adaptation strategy;

Ø Development strategy.

Refusal strategy manifests itself when life difficulties are perceived by a person as insoluble, which leads to the cessation of the fight against them. At the subjective level, this strategy manifests itself in the presence of a feeling of helplessness, which is reflected in the picture of the life path as a whole in the form of a narrowing of a person’s social contacts and areas of activity. A person exhibiting a life strategy of refusal is characterized by the perception of life in the form of numerous life failures, a negative perception of the future, which leads to a lack of planning. In the life perspective, one observes the predominance of the present, the egocentric nature of life goals, limited by the need for survival. Such a person constantly needs external help, showing conservatism in terms of the chosen methods of action. A gradual loss of interest in the past and a cessation of the active search for social contacts are possible.

If available adaptive strategy the individual accepts the changed life situations, as a result of which he strives to change his lifestyle and himself. Pehunen identifies three types of possible adaptation: passive, active and in the form of adaptive self-restraint. If a person adheres to a strategy of passive adaptation, then the difficulties that arise in life are perceived by him as granted and irreversible. As a result, such a person places responsibility for his own life on external authorities. In the case of a strategy of passive adaptation of life, the person is under the control of external forces (submission to authority, religion, society, the will of others, relying on circumstances). The life perspective is limited to the present with the absence of a clear hierarchy of goals. Social contacts are limited to the search for support and submission. There may be some dissatisfaction with the current state of affairs.

A person with active adaptation is able to change his own attitude towards his activities and develop new ways of behavior and activity under the restrictions set by the current situation. Active adaptation is characterized by the presence of a life perspective that has a wide potential for future opportunities. The present manifests itself in the search for new opportunities and the construction of plans for their implementation. Life is subordinated to its own, hierarchically structured goals with a diverse arsenal of means that allows easy adaptation to changing life situations. Social contacts and activities are characterized by breadth with the presence of a particularly significant sphere.

In the case of adaptive self-restraint, a person performs only those activities that are familiar, without mastering new ones, taking into account the changed conditions. The life perspective includes several life goals, in which the dominant one does not stand out. Life goals are based on the goals of society. Such a person is satisfied with the present, showing a desire to maintain a familiar way of life, using generally accepted methods in his activities. Social contacts are limited.

Development strategy represents overcoming a life conflict, manifested in the search and mastery of new life areas of activity.

K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya in one of her works examines in detail the issue of typology of life events. The author notes that the fundamental aspect of a life strategy is the question of correlating the type of personality with a way of life, and therefore two criteria for life strategies are identified - internal and external. The internal criterion refers to the degree of activity of the individual in building his own life. The external criterion for identifying life strategies is the objective requirements of social reality. Activity is a leading parameter that permeates all spheres of human life. It manifests itself as “the ability to achieve an optimal balance between what is desired and what is necessary.” Based on this, all life strategies are divided into two general types - active and passive. In addition, Abulkhanova identifies two forms of activity: initiative and responsibility. Their ratio may or may not be optimal. Active strategies can be with a predominance of initiative or with a predominance of responsibility.

Predominance initiatives in life strategy leads to the fact that a person is in a state of constant search, dissatisfaction with what has been achieved. A state of satisfaction may arise not at the final stage of activity, but during the process, when there is novelty and awareness of a huge number of possibilities. When showing activity, such a person focuses mainly only on the desirable, and not on the possible. When faced with reality, which often differs from the imaginary, in this case the inability to independently identify the goals, means and stages of exiting the current situation, to identify what is dependent and independent of the individual is manifested. External indicators of the life path may be limited to a small set of life events, but on a subjective level, life is perceived as very rich, since “such a person constantly creates contradictions.” Thus, an initiative life strategy is characterized by a constant expansion of the range of life activities, the presence of a personal perspective, manifested in the construction of a large number of multi-stage life plans, and a constant search for new living conditions.

Based on the method of self-expression in life, subtypes of life strategies of proactive people can be distinguished. For some, the way of self-expression in life is through self-giving and self-waste. Such people actively “involve many people in the circle of their creative searches, take responsibility not only for their scientific, but also for their personal destiny.” For others, the initiative is limited to “good and good intentions,” which almost never come true. The degree of activity is determined by the nature of the individual’s claims and the characteristics of the connection with responsibility. Externally, the life path of such a person consists of a large number of events that manifest themselves only in an external change in the previous way of life, i.e. in this case there is a tendency towards external dynamism of life.

In the case when a person’s life strategy shows a predominance responsibility a person “always strives to create the necessary conditions for himself, to foresee in advance what is needed to achieve a goal, to prepare to overcome difficulties.”

According to the author, responsibility can be of various types, which leads to the development of various life strategies. The executive type is characterized by a low ability of self-expression, lack of self-confidence, focus on the support of others, subordination to external control, fear of change, desire to maintain the usual course and structure of life, and lack of one’s own living space.

The self-sacrificing (dependent) type finds self-expression in fulfilling “duty”, which leads to satisfaction. As a result of dependence on others, there is a constant loss of one’s own “I”. The cessation of reciprocal feelings on the part of others is regarded as a failure in life.

The conservative type has detailed stages of life and a lack of long-term prospects. Such a person is satisfied with the usual course of life; the mere thought of possible changes is frightening. In the process of life, one often observes a rejection of one’s own interests and a desire to fulfill other people’s demands.

The lonely type is characterized by a variety of life paths as a result of the realization of responsibility in various roles. The prevailing attitude is that it is possible to survive only in solitude.

As an optimal life strategy, Abulkhanova calls one in which a person correlates his capabilities with life’s tasks, while constantly developing his potential. A person establishes the correspondence of his vital interests and living conditions on the basis of criteria chosen by himself or received from the outside.

In addition to active ones, Abulkhanova recognizes the existence of various types of passive life strategies. The main strategy is mental care, within which there is a strategy of hope and a strategy of life's dead end. When the strategy of hope prevails, a move away from a certain life contradiction into another area is manifested. At the same time, the person admits his inability to find a way out of the current situation, having new prospects in other areas. In a situation of internal impasse, the person does not see any alternative to continue real life.

In our opinion, to highlight the main parameters of life strategies, it is necessary to use three activity planning systems - aspirations, self-regulation and satisfaction, proposed by Abulkhanova-Slavskaya. Claims determine the contours of life, its limits, internal and external supports. They differentiate the living space, determining what the subject himself will do, and what he attributes to external conditions, expecting results from those around him or from the prevailing circumstances. After differentiation of the living space, the self-regulation system is activated, i.e. a system of means and ways to achieve set goals, as well as the ability to overcome life’s difficulties. In characterizing this system, it is important to pay attention to the amount of effort expended, perseverance, confidence, accuracy of achievement criteria, division of living space into what is dependent and independent of the individual. The main criterion is the individual’s reliance when achieving results - either on himself or on others. In addition, it is important to indicate how diverse and flexible the arsenal of a person’s means is, and her behavior in a situation of disapproval. By satisfaction, Abulkhanova understands “a form of feedback between an individual and the ways of his objectification in life (personal achievements, assessments of others, etc.).”

To summarize the description of the issue of life strategy, we will highlight the most significant, in our opinion, its structural components and parameters:

· Having ideas about the past, present and future;

· Integrity/disunity of life path;

· Presence/absence of meaning in life;

· Availability/absence of means and ways to achieve life goals;

· The need for external support when setting goals and overcoming difficulties;

· Degree of awareness of one’s own life;

· Ability for self-knowledge and life reflection;

· The degree of implementation of life plans;

· Life satisfaction/dissatisfaction.

_____________________

1. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya K.A. Psychology and personality consciousness. M., 2000.

2. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya K.A. Life prospects of the individual // Personality psychology and lifestyle / General. ed. E.V. Shorokhova. M., 1987.

3.Abulkhanova-Slavskaya K.A. Life strategy. M., 1991.

4.Pehunen R. Developmental tasks and life strategies // Personality psychology and lifestyle / Ed. E. V. Shorokhova. M., 1987.

Collection output:

TYPOLOGY OF PERSONALITY LIFE STRATEGIES

Dolgov Yuri Nikolaevich

k. social Sc., Associate Professor, BISGU, Balashov

Smotrova Tatyana Nikolaevna

k. pskh. Sc., Associate Professor, BISGU, Balashov

E- mail: tat- smotrova@ yandex. ru

The study was carried out with the financial support of the Russian Humanitarian Foundation within the framework of the Russian Humanitarian Science Foundation research project “Cross-cultural study of the life strategies of residents of small and medium-sized cities in Russia and Germany in conditions of socio-economic instability”, No. 11-06-01175a

In modern Russian socio-psychological literature, two main approaches to the study of life strategies can be distinguished, differing in what is chosen as the basis for their typologization. The first approach (N.F. Naumova and others) is characterized by the fact that the type of human social adaptation is taken as the basis for the typology of life strategies. So, N.F. Naumova identifies three types of strategies depending on the social and personal functions performed by a person in a transitional society:

1) strategy for successful external adaptation;

2) strategy for effective internal adaptation;

3) survival strategy.

The strategy for successful external adaptation is focused on the present and near future, identification is aimed at primary (family, etc.) and professional groups. The strategy of effective internal adaptation is focused on the past and distant future, identification is aimed at large groups - the country, the people. And finally, the third strategy - the survival strategy - is characterized by the low status and deteriorating financial situation of an individual who identifies himself with groups of people of similar fate.

The second approach (Yu.M. Reznik and others), going back to the works of E. Fromm, as the basis for typologizing life strategies, highlights the position that a person takes in relation to his own life and the activity associated with it. It is believed that a person can occupy three different, although interrelated, positions:

1) “have” (receptive activity);

2) “achieve” (motivational or “achievement” activity);

3) “to be” (creative or “existential” activity).

The first type of human activity (receptive or “acquisitive”) is the basis of the strategy of life well-being, the second type of activity is a prerequisite for the strategy of life success, and the third (creative, “existential”) activity is characteristic of the strategy of personal self-realization.

Given certain differences in approaches, it is possible to draw some analogies between life strategies in both cases and summarize them in a table

Table 1.

Typologies of life strategies.

If the first two analogies do not raise any particular doubts, then in the third case some discrepancy between the terms is striking - “survival strategy” and “life well-being strategy”. It is truly difficult to reconcile well-being and survival. With all due respect to N.F. Naumova and Yu.M. Reznik, both terms seem to us not entirely successful. These types of life strategies are the most common and perhaps a better name for them would be everyday or ordinary strategies.

We also cannot agree with the statement of Yu.M. Reznik and E.A. Smirnov that “in contrast to the dispositions of a person, the types of his life strategies are built not in a hierarchical order, but as adjacent and equal in nature leading orientations of people. From this point of view, there is, for example, no difference between a well-being strategy and a self-realization strategy." The authors themselves began to consider the analogies between the types of life strategies they proposed and the hierarchy of human needs according to A. Maslow, but for some reason they did not see the hierarchy of life strategies in these analogies. Thus, the strategy of life well-being corresponds to the first two steps of the famous “A. Maslow’s pyramid”, that is, physiological needs and the need for safety; the strategy of life success is based on a person’s social needs, the need for respect from the social environment and self-esteem and, finally, the strategy of self-realization corresponds to the individual’s need for self-actualization, self-improvement and self-realization.

In addition, we believe that the “fan of strategies” of life, in the figurative expression of J. Coleman, is not limited to only the three types of strategies given above. Depending on the choice of basis for determining the type of life strategy, we can assume the presence of different types of life strategies. Let’s try to systematize the various grounds on which life strategies can be classified:

· according to the degree of awareness of the individual - conscious and unconscious;

· according to the direction of changes occurring in the individual - progressive, regressive (constructive, destructive);

· according to the nature of the individual’s activity - active, reactive-adaptive, passive;

· by locus of control - external, internal (exogenous, endogenous);

· according to the way of perceiving living conditions - hedonistic and based on a sense of duty and responsibility;

· according to the degree of coincidence with the goals and objectives of society - prosocial, asocial and antisocial;

· according to the degree of implementation - effective (goal-achieving), ineffective and ineffective;

· by the nature and method of self-realization - strategies of self-actualization and manipulation;

· by the nature of the relationship between emotionality and rationality - affective, cognitive;

· according to priority in social exchange - appropriating, giving or balanced (harmonious);

· according to the presence of an element of creativity - creative (creative) and ordinary (everyday) or survival strategies (the latter - according to N.F. Naumova);

· by type of activity - success, well-being and self-realization (according to T. E. Reznik and Yu. M. Reznik);

· according to “basic tendencies” (S. Buller) - strategies for meeting needs, adaptive self-restraint, creative expansion and establishing internal harmony;

· by ends and means (R. Merton) - subordination, innovation, ritualism, retreatism, rebellion;

· according to the type of personal organization of time and attitude towards it (Kovalev V.I.) - everyday, functional-effective, contemplative-reflective and creative-transforming strategies of the individual’s life;

· according to the type of adaptation to the changing external social environment (according to N.N. Fedotova): two passive - reflexive-delayed and moderately adaptive; three active - career, instrumental, criminal;

· according to the degree of affiliation - individual and collectivist.

The choice of life strategies depends on the socio-economic state of society, the level of development of its culture, is determined by the method of production and property relations, the level and quality of life, belonging to a certain social stratum and cohort, the influence of traditions, ideals and values ​​dominant in society at a given historical moment time. It can be assumed that the choice of an individual’s life strategies also depends on gender, age, nationality, social status and other socially significant characteristics.

Thus, life strategies can be classified on various grounds, but in general they can be differentiated into several main types: self-realization strategies, strategies for achieving success and everyday (ordinary) strategies. Life strategies can be represented as a dynamic system of a person’s ideas about future life, implemented in everyday behavior through appropriate methods and resources.

Today we live in a society that is rapidly changing before our eyes. A relevant response to social challenges determined by the instability of social institutions for an individual can only be appropriate life strategies that do not lose their effectiveness even in turbulent times of crisis. And for this, a person must have in his arsenal at least several options for life strategies, since, as is known from systems theory, the higher their diversity, the more stable natural systems are. It seems that, with some degree of assumption, this principle can be applied to social systems. This principle or, if you like, type of strategy can be called a diversification strategy, which will be characterized by an increase in the degree of diversity of life strategies used in various conditions in order to more effectively achieve the goals set by a person.

Life strategies, objectified into real behavior and activities of people, determine a person’s life path. The fuller realization of a person’s personal potential, his self-realization and self-actualization and, ultimately, life satisfaction depend on how effective life strategies are during periods of socio-economic instability.

Listliterature:

1. Kovalev V.I. Category of time in psychology (personal aspect) // Categories of materialist dialectics in psychology. Ed. L.I. Antsiferova. M.: Nauka, 1988. pp. 16–230.
2. Naumova N.F. Human life strategy in a transitional society // Sociological Journal. 1995. No. 2. P. 20.
3. Reznik T. E., Reznik Yu.M. Personal life orientation: analysis and counseling // Sociological studies. 1996. No. 6. pp. 110–119.
4. Reznik Yu. M., Smirnov E. A. Life strategies of the individual (experience of complex analysis). M., Institute of Man of the Russian Academy of Sciences, Independent Institute of Civil Society, 2002. pp. 173–174.
5. Reznik Yu. M., Smirnov E. A. Life strategies of the individual (experience of complex analysis). M., Institute of Man of the Russian Academy of Sciences, Independent Institute of Civil Society, 2002. pp. 174–175.
6. Fedotova N. N. Social integration of youth into the sphere of labor activity. Abstract of the dissertation for the scientific degree of Candidate of Sociological Sciences. Saratov. 1998.
7. $18. Fromm E. Man for himself. Minsk, 1992. P. 66.

$19. Shweri R. Theoretical concept of James Coleman // Sociological Journal. 1996. No. 1/2. P. 65

$110. Encyclopedic Sociological Dictionary / Ed. ed. Osipova G.V. M.: ISPI RAS, 1995. pp. 811–812.

$111. Buhler Ch. Der menschliche Lebenslauf als Psychologisches Problem. Leipzig, 1933.

Existential psychology (from Latin existentia - existence) is one of the areas of “humanistic psychology” that studies:

1) problems of time, life and death;

2) problems of freedom, responsibility and choice;

3) problems of communication, love and loneliness;

4) problems of finding the meaning of existence.

Existential psychology emphasizes the uniqueness of the personal experience of a particular person, which is not reducible to general patterns. One of the goals of existential psychology is to solve the problem of restoring the authenticity of a person - the correspondence of his being in the world to his inner nature. In the practice of modern existential psychology, many achievements of psychoanalysis are used. The most prominent representatives of existential psychology are L. Binswanger, M. Boss, E. Minkowski, R. May, W. Frankl, J. Bugenthal.

In domestic psychology the problem of being a person developed on the basis of the subject-activity approach of S.L. Rubinstein. K.A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya created the concept of life strategy, M.M. Bakhtin developed a life (moral) philosophy, V.A. Romenets devoted his work to the philosophical and psychological theory of action.

Russian philosopher and psychologist Rubinstein Sergei Leonidovich (1889 - 1960) in his latest work, “Man and the World,” he recreates the picture of cultural-philosophical anthropology, at the center of which is man in the unity of his existence, development, activity, creativity, etc. The most important thing for Rubinstein is his appeal to man as the semantic center of the world, as a subject of life, as a subject of interhuman relations.

The personality does not dissolve in activity, but through it solves complex life problems and contradictions. Here activity acts as behavior and actions. This is the quality of an individual as a subject of life who determines his values ​​and ways of realizing them in life, builds his relationships (and methods of communication in them), and finds ways of self-realization in activities that are adequate to his personality. A person as a subject of life is considered from the point of view of:

1) mental makeup - individual characteristics of mental processes and states;

2) personal make-up - motivation, character and abilities, in which the driving forces of the individual, her life potential and resources are revealed;

3) lifestyle - the ability to use your mind and moral qualities in order to set and solve life problems, activity, worldview and life experience.

From this point of view, Rubinstein defines the basic life formations of the individual - these are activity, consciousness and ability to organize life time.

Rubinstein says that the path of life is a kind of integrity and at the same time consists of stages, each of which can become a turning point in the life of an individual. For Rubinstein, the path of life is not the sum of life events, individual actions, or creative products. “The path of life is a holistic, continuous phenomenon; Each person has his own story and even becomes a person precisely because he has his own life story!” For Rubinstein, it is important not just to identify age stages, but to take into account how each stage prepares and influences the next one. Each stage plays an important role in the path of life, but does not determine it with fatal inevitability. The central problem of personal life is whether a person can become the subject of his own life. Personality as a subject of life is the idea of ​​an individually active person who builds the conditions of life and his attitude towards it. A person becomes the subject of his life due to his ability to solve his problems, be responsible for his actions, through responsibility and relationships with other people. A person becomes a subject of life in the sense that he develops a way to resolve life’s contradictions and realizes his responsibility to himself and people for the consequences of such a decision.

Ksenia Aleksandrovna Abulkhanova-Slavskaya (born 1932), developing the ideas of S.L. Rubinstein, believes that resolving the contradictions of life contributes to the development of personality. She sees the resolution of the contradictions of life in the ways people relate to each other. The way in which life’s contradictions are resolved characterizes a person’s socio-psychological and personal maturity.

“Personal maturity is manifested in the ability to combine one’s individual characteristics, one’s status and age capabilities, one’s own aspirations with the demands of society and others. We define the ability to make this connection as a life strategy.”

Abulkhanova-Slavskaya proposes to consider the life path of an individual in its integrity, and the life strategy should consist in revealing and resolving the true causes of contradictions, and not in avoiding them through life changes.

! Life strategy - this is an individual organization, constant regulation of the course of life in accordance with the values ​​of a given person and his individual orientation. Life strategy is the choice, definition and implementation of life values.

& Abulkhanova-Slavskaya, K.A. Life strategy / K. A. Abulkhanova-Slavskaya. - M.: Mysl, 1991. - P. 67.

Personality psychology and lifestyle/ Academician Sciences of the USSR, Institute of Psychology; resp. ed. E. V. Shorokhova. - M.: Nauka, 1987. - 219 p.

According to the concept of action, which was developed Vladimir Andreevich Romenets (1926 - 1998), the phenomenon of the meaning of life should be attributed to the aftereffect of an act. An act as an explanatory principle of psychology is recognized as more satisfactory than a reflex or an action precisely because it can be extended to complex phenomena of the semantic sphere of personality without reducing the special content of the latter. V.A. Romenets, defending the merits of the action mechanism as a logical and historical-psychological cell of the history of world psychology, showed that action is a mediating link between the psyche and its objective correlate (the world, other people), between the psyche and the body, as well as between structural components of the psyche. An act is a way of self-determination of human behavior based on self-knowledge and self-creativity and is associated with the formation of the meaning of life. A person gets to know himself by carrying out an action and analyzing its consequences, creates himself, consolidating the meaning of life. Manifestations of the meaning of life can be considered specific attitudes that are embodied by a person in his actions. In the historical and psychological works of V.A. Romenets, the logical structure of the action mechanism is revealed, which is associated with its historical structure, the emphasis that each cultural era placed on one of its elements.

The elements of the logical structure of an action are situation, motivation, action and aftereffect. The formation of the meaning of an individual’s life occurs at the stage of aftereffect, which is a consequence of reflection on the action, and the latter, in turn, embodies the results of motivational processing of situational certainty.

The aftereffect is characterized by the actualization of self-knowledge based on the implementation of the act and the self-creation of a person through the consolidation of the meaning of life. In the aftereffect of an act, a special type of internal activity is carried out, which is characterized by cognition and the creation of new mental substructures, which can be defined as the process of searching for the meaning of life.

Austrian psychiatrist and psychologist Viktor Emil Frankl (1905 - 1997)- author of the concept of logotherapy, according to which the driving force of human behavior is the desire to find and realize the meaning of life existing in the external world. A person does not ask this question, but answers it with his real actions. The role of meaning is played by values ​​- semantic universals that generalize the experience of humanity.

Frankl describes three classes of values ​​that make a person’s life meaningful: values ​​of creativity(primarily labor); values ​​of experience(particularly love) and attitude values(a consciously developed position in critical life circumstances that cannot be changed). By realizing meaning, a person thereby realizes himself; self-actualization is only a by-product of the realization of meaning. Conscience is an organ that helps a person determine which of the potential meanings inherent in a situation is true for him.

Frankl identified three ontological dimensions (levels of existence) of man: biological, psychological and spiritual. It is in the latter that meanings and values ​​are localized, playing a decisive role in determining behavior in relation to lower levels. The embodiment of human self-determination is the ability to: self-transcendence, focus outside oneself; to self-detachment; to acceptance positions in relation to external situations and to oneself. Free will in Frankl's understanding is inextricably linked with responsibility for the choices made, without which it degenerates into arbitrariness.

! Task 5.3. Read the work of V. Frankl and determine the connection between the categories of action and the meaning of life.

& Frankl, V. Man in search of meaning: trans. from English and German / V. Frankl. - M.: Progress, 1990. - 368 p.

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There is an I-today, and there will be an I-tomorrow. And when tomorrow comes, I will be so grateful to myself for what I did yesterday, that is. today right now - I washed the dishes in the evening before going to bed, or learned my homework before the test, or went through the day without lunch and dinner, or called Pyotr Petrovich at Romashka LLC, etc.). This is a very good motivation that helps you do today what you really want to put off until tomorrow. This principle of life helps not to put things off until later.

Yes, yes, today you have to force yourself to do it, and yes, yes, it’s really not easy. But tomorrow or tomorrow there will be a triumph of your glory, look forward to it by doing what you need to do, but don’t want to (there is no doubt that tomorrow will come, right? ;0)

"Key Details for Victory"

A key detail is something without which you cannot win, even if you do everything else, and vice versa, sometimes you don’t need to do everything, only the “Key detail for victory” is enough.

"Strength lies in indifference to obstacles"

Imagine a rocket, and not just a rocket, but a ballistic missile, i.e. a rocket in which the coordinates of the target, a map of the area and the route to it were placed.

And then the rocket took off. On the way to her goal, she encounters obstacles that are marked on her route map and she simply goes around them along the initially specified trajectory. But there are also obstacles that are not marked on the map, such as a flying bird.

The rocket electronics see an unidentified object, initiate an evasive maneuver, go around the bird and return to the previous route, continuing the flight to the target. The rocket doesn’t care what kind of obstacle it was, it doesn’t care what other obstacles there will be in its path, it simply goes around them. She will go around them in order to reach and destroy the target.

The rocket has a mission - to destroy the target, everything else is interference that you just need to go around to complete the mission.

Indifference to obstacles means that no matter what obstacles are encountered along the way, you just need to go around them and fulfill the mission - to reach the goal. Principle of life The strength of indifference to obstacles works well when carrying out planned tasks and implementing plans.

“Strength lies in indifference to the “long” result”

Imagine a barrel that needs to be filled with water. You have a bucket, and you know that a barrel is 100 buckets of water. Filling a barrel with water is a “long” result, and 100 buckets are 100 steps towards this long result.

Forget about the long result, focus on the results of specific steps.

If you bring a bucket of water every time (here it is important to monitor the quality of the result of the “bring a bucket of water” step), then the barrel will be filled after 100 buckets.

The quality of the result of the step “bring a bucket of water” consists of:
- a bucket of water, in which the water is divided according to this division, i.e. full bucket of water
- all the water from the bucket flows out to the side.

If you bring a bucket of water every time and monitor the quality of the result of the “bring a bucket of water” step, then the long result “fill the barrel with water” will be executed automatically when you reach 100 buckets of water.

On the way to the “long result”, taking specific steps, you need to check from time to time the quality of the long result, whether the barrel is filled with water or whether everything is OK, but do this as you go along, and the main focus of attention is on buckets of water. This principle of life helps where the long-term result is very far away, so as not to get lost in the daily routine on the way to the goal, but to achieve it and do it efficiently.

If you constantly think about the long result, without paying due attention to specific steps, then the buckets will be, for example, one full, another half, the third three-quarters, etc., then the result of “filling the barrel with water” after 100 buckets will not be achieved, because a few more buckets are not enough.

"Failure is part of victory if the lesson is learned"

Your further actions and the result of these further actions depend on what questions you ask yourself. It’s like a stone at the crossroads of two roads: if you go to the left it will be “this”, to the right it will be “that”, but you need to decide where to go right now.

WHAT'S HAPPENED? - The cup broke. (what it is, i.e. the fact itself without evaluation)

WHAT BENEFITS ARE WHAT NEW OPPORTUNITIES FROM THE CURRENT SITUATION? - Now you can buy a new cup.
(you need to find a benefit in this situation and in any other. There is still a benefit from the situation, no matter what the situation is. The benefit from this situation is that you can buy a new one, it was already old and tired)

HOW TO DO IT DIFFERENTLY TO WIN? - Next time be more careful and place the cup further from the edge of the table.

WHAT'S HAPPENED?
WHAT BENEFITS ARE WHAT NEW OPPORTUNITIES FROM THE CURRENT SITUATION?
HOW TO DO IT DIFFERENTLY TO WIN?
This chain of questions is exactly the stone at the crossroads to failure or success, and by asking these questions with each critical situation, your strength will increase, the mistake will be processed into a new opportunity, another step forward to victory

"Package your act"

In everything that surrounds us there is form (what is outside) and there is content (what is inside), and this is also true in relation to actions. When we do something, we achieve some result we need.

When performing an action, remember that we all live in a society among people, and any action you take will definitely be appreciated by others, whether we want it or not. In order to achieve results and at the same time get “5 points” from the people around you, that is, leave a good impression of yourself, maintain relationships - you need to give your action a form that will be received with approval. Pack your actions - this is one of the ancient Chinese wisdoms, which is successfully applied today in politics, at work and in everyday life.

People may forget exactly what you said, people may forget what you did, but they will definitely never forget how you made them feel. Therefore, package your actions in a package that others will like (form), and do what will lead you to results (content).

"16 rules for success in life from Bob Parsons"

When we are in our comfort zone, nothing happens that matters. People often say: “Stability is important to me.” My answer to this is simple: “Stability is for the dead.”

• 2. Never give up.

It almost never works out on the first try. Just because what you're doing isn't working doesn't mean it will continue to do so. It just means that you have chosen the wrong approach. If it were easy, absolutely everyone would be doing it, and you wouldn't have a chance to excel.

• 3. If you are ready to give up, then you are much closer to success than you think.

There is an old Chinese saying that I just love. Here it is: “The temptation to give up will be especially strong shortly before victory.”

• 4. Regarding all those things that bother you.

Accept in advance the worst that can happen, and try to understand in detail exactly what that worst might look like.

The “worst” consequences are hardly worse than the “uncertain” consequences. When I was struggling to start Parsons Technology, my father would often tell me, “Robert, if you don’t succeed, no one will eat you for it.”

• 5. Focus on your desires.

Remember this old saying: “Thoughts matter.”

• 6. Take on only as much work as you can do in one day.

No matter how difficult a situation is, you can still get out of it if you don't try to look too far into the future and focus on the present. Any problem can be solved if you deal with it exactly as much as you can handle in a day.

• 7. Always move forward.

Never stop developing. Never stop improving. Never stop doing something new. The moment you stop trying to make your business better, it begins to die. Set a goal for yourself to improve every day, even in something small. Follow the Japanese concept of kaizen: small daily improvements lead to great success.

• 8. Make decisions quickly.

General George Patton's favorite saying: “A plan executed at lightning speed today is a thousand times better than a perfect plan tomorrow.”

• 9. Measure everything that matters to you.

I swear it works. Anything that is constantly considered, measured and observed gets better.

• 10. Anything left unattended is destroyed.

If you want to find problems that are still unknown to you, take a closer look at things that have not been paid attention to for a long time. I guarantee you that this is where the problems will be.

• 11. Keep an eye on your competitors, but keep an even closer eye on your own business.

When you study your competitors, remember that from a distance everything seems perfect. Even planet Earth, if you fly far enough away from it, looks like a peaceful place.

• 12. Never let anyone intimidate you.

In our law-based society, in conditions of equality, you have as much right to do your business as everyone else - provided, of course, that your business is not illegal.

• 13. Don't expect justice from life.

Life isn't fair. There will be concessions only if you arrange them for yourself. You will achieve your goal only when you stop thinking about justice.

• 14. Solve your own problems.

Once you can find the answers to your questions yourself, you will become competitive. Masura Ibuka, one of the founders of Sony, stated this rule best: “You will never succeed in science, business or anything else if you follow everyone else.” There is also an old Eastern proverb that I often remember about this. Here it is: “A wise man is his own adviser.”

• 15. Don't judge yourself too harshly.

Relax. Quite often (at least in half of the cases) we owe our success to pure luck. None of us are as in control of our lives as we think we are.

• 16. There is always a reason to smile.

Find that reason. After all, you are already lucky to be alive. Life is short. I agree more and more with my little brother. He always reminds me: “It’s important to live life not long, but fun.”

"Power of Spirit is the Key to Victory"

[material to be prepared for publication]

"Every person is a loaded weapon."

Every person around you is a loaded weapon. Be gentle and speak with respect. For example, a fragile woman who happens to be next to you in a subway car carries knitting needles with her because she has such a hobby - knitting a sweater on the way home. Today she is having her period and is in a terrible mood. Someone accidentally pushed someone. A simple verbal squabble can end very badly, because the knitting needle is nearby, the mood is bad, and critical days will not allow you to think about what she is doing by pointing the knitting needle at some “man” or “woman” who is unpleasant to her. She definitely has enough strength for this, the time is 0.1 second, and the consequences can be fatal.

Another example: a professor at an institute who was called a goat in a minibus (possibly) will simply remain silent out of politeness, an IT guy (possibly) will snap back, a road roller driver (possibly) will fight with his fists, and the one who served time in places not so remote (possibly ) will take out a knife. Who is in front of you, a professor, an IT guy, a driver or a criminal - this will determine how events will unfold in the next second.

Therefore, the simplest thing to do is to adhere to the rule of speaking respectfully and delicately to everyone, and to take into account that every stranger can themselves be a loaded weapon. This principle of life for personal safety.

Speak and think in phrases and words that are good for life
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