Cool phrases and expressions about life. Short funny phrases Cool conversational phrases
Loving a person who doesn't give a damn about me is my style, yeah...
There are a lot of good people in the world, but I always communicate with fucked-up people, it’s more interesting with them
And in a white dress and veil I walk to the altar with flowers and my father shouts after me Anton, fucking don’t disgrace your family!
Who said that hatred needs a justified reason? No such thing.
If a cat flies with its ass forward over the fence, it means it stole something from the table.
Even a billion hearts under your ava will not correct the shortcomings of nature on your ****
Briefly about myself - I have no brains and I fuck a lot
At home they say: “Leave your nerves at work!”, At work: “Leave your nerves at home!” Fuck, where should I leave my nerves?
I respect the ocean. He takes lives and he doesn't give a fuck.
They say that when you give a damn about a person, he begins to understand what he has lost. So let the fucker rule the world. Everyone will be happy.
A hedgehog came out of the fog, ran out of marijuana, suddenly found hemp, and entered the fog again!
And again I step into the bottomless heights, with a huge poster... “Everything is fucked up.”
More than 230 witty, caustic, funny, cool, clever phrases, aphorisms and quotes for all occasions.
Children are interested in the question: where does everything come from, adults - where does everything go?
Appetite and guests come during meals.
I want to live forever. So far it's working.
Nobody knows as much as I don't know...
Women guess everything. They are only wrong when they reason
A woman sounds proud, but also loud, capricious and stupid.
God! I ask you for death! Don’t refuse me, Lord, I’m not asking for myself...
Toast: To beautiful ladies and other mythical characters!
How quickly time flies: you don’t even have time to wake up and you’re already late for work.
A girl is like a calculator: she adds problems, takes up time, multiplies expenses, divides property!!!
The rings on the roof of the wedding car mean that the initial score is 0:0
A woman is ready to do anything for love, even make love. A man is ready to do anything to make love, even to love.
Before spending the night with a man, a woman wants to understand whether she loves him. And a man can only understand whether he loves a woman after spending the night with her.
A man changes women when he wants to experience a lot, and a woman changes men when she experiences nothing.
Even the most beautiful legs grow from the ass.
Did the virus spill coffee on the keyboard too?
White and fluffy is actually gray and hairy.
There are no unbearable people, there are narrow doors.
One head is good, but with a body it’s better.
Take people's word, certified by signature and seal.
When I get married, give birth to a son, I’ll call him Kuzya - and I’ll be Kuzya’s mother!
You shouldn’t respond to evil with violence, you can’t even imagine what raped evil is capable of.
Is it okay what I say when you interrupt?
Talk, talk, I always yawn when I'm interested.
The road to success is always closed for repairs.
If you think smoking doesn't affect a woman's voice, try flicking the ashes onto the carpet.
If you hesitate for a long time, you can sway everyone...
A woman is kind: she can forgive a man everything, even if he is not guilty of anything.
A woman driving is like a star in the sky: you see her, but she doesn’t see you.
A woman wants everything - from one thing. A man is one from all.
The source of our wisdom is our experience. The source of our experience is our stupidity.
What a pity that you are finally leaving...
I am replacing the self-assembled tablecloth with a similar sheet.
Advertisement in the newspaper: I'm renting, damaging
One fish - another: - Well, let's say there is no God... And who then changes the water in the aquarium?
One of the most striking manifestations of optimism is the phrase: “What a fool I was!”
The clothes my mother gave birth in have become worn out...
If love is in you, it is strength, if you are in love, it is weakness.
Why do you need health at your age?
I'm not stupid - I'm not in the mood
Who said that Kutuzov did not have one eye? Kutuzov had one eye!
Workers are needed to work on the job. Payment in money.
I'm not serious - I'm bored
I'm not beautiful - I'm freaking cute
Healthy sleep not only prolongs life, but also reduces working hours
The penguin is a rare bird. This means that it must fly to the middle of the Dnieper.
He who does not go forward goes back - there is no standing position.
There is nothing sadder than the life of women who only knew how to be beautiful.
There is more pride in jealousy than love.
Give a person what he wants and you will deprive him of the meaning of life.
Only tomorrow can be worse than yesterday.
“Where words are few, they carry weight” - Shakespeare.
I've missed over 9,000 times in my career. I lost almost 300 matches. 26 times I was entrusted with making the decisive shot and I missed. I have failed very often in my life. That's why I succeeded.
The most difficult thing in an argument is not so much to defend your point of view as to have a clear idea of it.
Born to crawl, he will crawl everywhere.
“We can speak openly about our shortcomings only with those who recognize our merits.”
“It’s not enough to have a goal in life, you need to be able to shoot accurately.”
Don’t wish for people what you wish for yourself, you may have different tastes
We have learned to fly like birds and swim like fish, but we still need to learn to simply walk the earth like brothers.
Too many people think about protection instead of thinking about opportunity. They seem to be more afraid of life than death.
There can be a great fire in our soul. But no one may ever come to bask with him, because those passing by see only a wisp of smoke.
What is the end of the world for a caterpillar is a birthday for a butterfly.
Life is what happens when you are busy implementing other plans.
I want to go to hell, not heaven. There I can enjoy the company of popes, kings and dukes, while heaven is inhabited only by beggars, monks and apostles.
Hurry up to live so you can start all over again.
There's no point in growing wings if you don't know where to fly.
My nights are better than your days.
Be careful what you wish for, otherwise your wishes may come true.
If I, yielding to requests, began to write about myself, it would be a plaintive book - “Fate is a whore” © Ranevskaya
My life philosophy: ask fewer questions and eat the ice cream before it melts
When you are not needed, but you are, this is a terrible situation that humiliates you first of all
One woman is DIFFERENT from another: no better, no worse, just different...
A screw driven in with a hammer is stronger than a nail driven in with a screwdriver.
Love is like a tree, it grows by itself, takes deep roots into our entire being and often continues to turn green and bloom even on the ruins of our heart.
Life is given once, but it succeeds even less often.
It happens that love will pass on its own,
Without affecting either the heart or the mind.
When a woman chooses a lover, it is not as important to her whether she likes him as whether other women like him
When I eat, I am deaf and dumb, cunning and fast, and devilishly smart...
Men value the most material thing in women - beauty, and women value the most ephemeral thing in men: reliability.
Woman may not have yet created a single great invention, but she has created all the great inventors.
A woman never notices what is done for her, but she will always notice what is not done for her.
A woman in love is more likely to forgive a large indiscretion than a small infidelity.
If you want to force a woman to change her mind, you must categorically agree with her.
Women have only one means of making us happy and thirty thousand means - of making us unhappy.
Women, like cats, often love not their owner, but their home.
Women are absolutely natural and consistent in their inconstancy...
Women are a special people: if you compliment them, they take them as truth; if you tell them the truth, they are offended.
One is not born a woman, one becomes one.
A woman who loves boldly does not try to treat pressing problems like a man - she is just a woman, before whose femininity she respectfully bows and retreats from any everyday troubles.
I want to love you, but not hold you. I want to appreciate you without reasoning. I want to join you, but not invade you. I want to ask, but not demand. I want to help, but not blame for inability. If we both want this, then we can meet.
Don't brag that your wife is the best: women may be offended, and men will want to make sure.
If you persuade a woman for too long, she will think that you are only capable of talking.
Married life is war every day and truce every night.
Don’t worry if your wife had someone before you: it’s worse if she has someone after.
The only real mistake is not correcting your past mistakes.
There are two ways to command women. But no one knows them.
A man, even if he could understand what a woman was thinking, would still not believe it.
Friendship between a man and a woman is based on the hope of one of the parties that this is not just friendship.
In love, one always kisses, and the other only turns his cheek
Women don't like timid men. Cats don't like cautious rats.
Men are always right and women are never wrong.
A career is a wonderful thing, but it can't warm anyone on a cold night.
The baby is a great example of a ruling minority.
Becoming a father is very easy. Being a father, on the other hand, is difficult.
Call rule. The phone you're looking at never rings.
God created woman later because he did not want to listen to advice when creating man.
The more women strive to free themselves, the more unhappy they become.
A friend is a person who knows everything about you - and yet loves you.
They forgive a loved one what they do not forgive others, and they do not forgive what they forgive others.
If a woman hates you, it means she loved you, loves you or will love you.
No one becomes a good person by accident.
The most offensive thing is when your dream comes true for someone else.
Difficulties are created most easily.
Where is the beginning of the end with which the beginning ends.
A beautiful woman usually suffers from two diseases at once: delusions of grandeur and delusions of persecution.
If a person is happy for more than one day, it means they are hiding something from him.
A true friend is someone who will hold your hand and feel your heart.
All girls are angels by nature, but when their wings are broken off, they have to fly on a broom.
Set big goals - they're harder to miss!
The average woman prefers to be beautiful rather than smart, because the average man sees better than thinks.
Paradox: If you put 6 socks in the washing machine, you only take 5 out.
When the toilet is closed, you want to pay to use it.
The customer doesn't know what he wants until he sees what he gets.
When there is nothing left to do, many do just that.
Everything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or leads to obesity.
May you live as poor as you are!
The day was not wasted!
If you can’t change the situation, change your attitude towards it.
Short roads differ from long ones in that they charge tolls. And on dark roads they really like to announce the price at the end of the road...
Happiness is something that you don’t notice when it’s there, and you notice when it’s not...
I am made from a man's rib to protect his heart)))
Very often we choose not from what we want to have, but from what we are afraid of losing.
You don't sleep all day, don't eat all night - of course you get tired...
Conscience is a person’s wealth, and we, students, are a poor people....
A genius sleeps within each of us, and every day it grows stronger.
I didn’t even think to think what you thought!
Everyone knows that money does not buy happiness, but everyone wants to see for themselves.
A keychain is a small figurine that allows you to lose all your keys at once.
Gorilka is not Ukrainian vodka, it is a small anthropoid monkey.
By the time you find a place in the sun, it’s already evening.
Everyone has children, butterflies have children, fish, birds, even dogs. Only the pencil has no children, because it has a rubber band at the end!
Love is an electric current that runs from head to toe. And it gets to the point where a son or daughter is born.
Let us live a great life, so that we don’t want to change our lives! Falling in love is a reason for temptation, let's seduce each other!!!
Only those who feel fear in their hearts have courage,
Who looks into the abyss, but looks with pride in his eyes.
It's no wonder that women don't have time for anything: just look at their tiny watches.
Only one person understood me; and, to tell the truth, he didn’t understand me either.
Life is a cross-country race in which everyone strives to get ahead in order to reach the finish line last.
Only on your birthday will you find out how many unnecessary things exist in the world.
My conscience is clear because I never use it.
Men love beautiful women more than smart ones because they find it easier to look rather than think.
A well-hinged tongue always itches.
It’s good to do nothing and then rest.
Never sport with a fool, he will bring you down to his level and beat you on his turf.
You may not be mine, but I am yours.
The most irresistible women's cosmetics are powder for male brains!
Never eat the last cutlet from the frying pan: you won’t be satisfied with just one cutlet, and you’ll have to wash the empty frying pan.
So many good, sweet girls... I'm the only exception to all the rules...
When a man is not with a woman, he starts doing stupid things. When a woman is not with a man... she starts doing dirty tricks.
It is much easier to receive forgiveness later than permission first.
“The task of making a person happy was not part of the plan for the creation of the world.”
How we live is a state secret, what is it for - a commercial one!
When I was born, I was so amazed that I didn’t talk to anyone for 2 years!
A woman is like a weapon: you cannot play with her.
Life, no matter how you curse it, is still worth living.
A woman is dangerous for every paradise...
You don't have to have friends, you have to be friends with them...
Living is harmful, people die from it...
There are always at least two truths...
Doing bullshit at work develops hearing, peripheral vision, reaction and vigilance in general...
Loneliness is bad because few people can tolerate themselves for long...
A virgin is no better than a slut - both, in essence, are thinking about the same thing
The best way to get rid of temptation is to give in to it...
As long as I’ve lived, I can’t understand two things: where the dust comes from and where the money goes.
It’s better to do it and regret it than to regret not doing it.
Following the sandwich law, we can conclude that if a sandwich is spread on both sides, it will hang in the air.
I have everything except money and happiness.
Your joy from the arrival of a clear sunny morning will be incomplete if it suddenly becomes clear to you that it is Monday.
If they try to drag you into a win-win lottery, this means that you will not leave without losing.
The registry office is a place where love is rejected.
Avoiding praise is asking for repetition.
Tell me what you're thinking about and I'll tell you what.
All gods WERE immortal.
Fools die on Fridays, and who else will die when there are two weekends ahead.
If Eve did not cheat on Adam, then why did humanity come from apes?
It's good to be brave, but scary...
The later the ambulance arrives, the more accurate its diagnosis...
If you are late for work, it means you have it.
A negative result is also a result, especially if it is a result for HIV.
You have to live in such a way that you envy yourself.
Everyone knows that our life is a game, but how to play it...
If you're arguing with an idiot, he's probably doing the same thing.
No one can bring us to our knees! We lay, and we will lie!
If a man is a goat, this does not mean that he is a beast in bed.
Everything about a woman should be perfect - don’t shove anything into her!
Life is like a piano: the key is black, the key is white, the lid....(
The terrorists' ransom demands have been met. The terrorists were ransomed and put to bed.
No one has ever died from knowledge, but I don’t want to risk it.
A wonderful phrase: good always triumphs over evil! It’s still unclear who is winning whom...
April Fools' Day is an American folk holiday.
Life is like a dog sled: if you don't go ahead, you always see the same thing.
Happiness is when the desired coincides with the inevitable.
Every time I leave the hairdresser, I am tormented by the same question - why did they ask me how I wanted to cut my hair?
Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.
Love is like war: easy to start, difficult to end, impossible to forget...
A little bit of Vishnevsky:
I look good, but not often.
It's easier for men, their mothers-in-law love...
Yes, finally agree: I am not stubborn!
I love without memory... without memory... who?..
Years go by, I'm still over thirty...
The obstacles to happiness are you and excess weight.
Here is a scoundrel: he blushes - and he’s not lying!
Today there is pilaf without meat. And no rice.
What kind of money is this? This is surrender!!!
Both my mother and the Ministry of Health warned...
He is meaningfully silent, but asks unambiguously!
In bed he is like a god: he doesn’t snore!
There is a lot of childishness in him: he doesn’t like semolina porridge...
I believe that you too will be able to ruin someone’s life!
No matter what, no matter where, no matter with anyone...
Time heals, but the outcome is always fatal...
I'm covered in soap, but I can control myself...
Fate, baring its teeth, smiled...
I have nothing to hide, but I really wanted to hide...
Love is needed like money: every day.
I fell asleep without saying goodbye... I'm getting a divorce!
I demand it now, but not right away!
It's time to put up, tomorrow is payday...
Making a woman happy is easy, but very expensive.
Man is a wolf to man, and zombies are zombies.
Alarm clocks don't have good melodies.
Girls, learn to cook! It doesn’t matter who you marry, he will want to eat anyway!
It's hard to make history, but it's easy to get into trouble.
Men are always right and women are never wrong.
Things are never as good with money as they are bad without them.
The happy parents named the second twin boy Boyan.
She sat on him, and he stood on her.
Only a Russian person will understand the true meaning of the set of letters: PSHLNHPDRS.
There’s nothing to say about my life, if it’s not swearing.
Tell me what you're thinking about and I'll tell you what.
Love your grandchildren - they will take revenge on your children.
Hmayak Hakobyan, shaving his lyaska-masyaski, almost shaved off his akhalay-mahalai.
In a parallel universe, people don't rob banks, the banks themselves rob people. But no... it's in this one.
During a Latin exam, a failed student accidentally summoned the devil.
The most honest eyes are the hungry ones.
Labor made a man out of a monkey, but the iPhone fixed that.
As long as you have an ass, the adventures will not end.
If you are late for work, it means you have it.
Girls, let's go to the sea!
- We are not girls. We've already gone twice.
The New Year went well if in the morning people on the street call you “The Dude from YouTube.”
Only our man knows the difference between a meal and a snack.
A boy whose father ties a scarf in winter can hold his breath for 6 hours.
I'm not clairvoyant. I'm an ass-kicker.
Candies "Crow's feet". Feet in my mouth!
If a husband gives flowers for no reason, then there is still a reason.
No one has ever died from knowledge, but I don’t want to risk it.
Dear, I looked at your mistress and decided - this is not cheating. This is a feat!
A mortgage is not a prison, there will be no amnesty!
Girl, don't bring out the rabbit in me!
A group of smart climbers have circumnavigated Everest.
The hardest thing to carry is an empty wallet.
You don't get hired at the Dobry juice plant until you kill three evil people.
The elevator doesn't work. The nearest elevator is in the next entrance.
Anyone who gets up early is definitely not me.
Money doesn't worry me - it calms me down.
The lisping robber made everyone "Lick!"
One head is good, but two is already ugly.
The wife of the minibus driver in bed screams loudly, clearly and in advance.
Friendship is friendship, but you can be drunk.
The famous writer married a top model. After all, they crossed their ass and arm.
A diet is when you don’t eat sausage, but secretly eat it.
My salary is good... small, but good.
Mom wanted a boy, and dad wanted a girl. That's how they met.
For some reason, up to a liter, booze is measured in grams.
