How to reconcile after a fight

Immediately after a quarrel, it is not always necessary to run to put up. The intensity of passions has not cooled down yet, feelings are overflowing. In some cases, it is necessary to maintain a certain pause so that the offended party does not say even more wrong words under the influence of emotions.

Psychologists say that such a break depends on the following factors:

  • Quarrel "misunderstanding". In this case, you can not wait a second, because the obvious absurdity can develop into a more serious problem. It is necessary to sort out the critical situation right on the spot before it is presented in a different light by the envious couple of lovers.
  • Conflict "Clash of Interest". With the discomfort created in the relationship, it is necessary to wait at least a day in order to clearly understand for yourself the mutual claims against each other. Having built a plan for the upcoming conversation in your mind, you can safely put it into practice a day after the contention that has arisen.
  • . In this case, passions can flare up with such force that communication between the two partners must be temporarily stopped. Psychologists say that a couple of days are enough for the two halves who quarreled about this to become one again.
  • Conflict after cheating partner. In such a situation, everything is very individual, because each person reacts differently to such a betrayal. Someone can make contact with a cheater in a week, and some people delete him from their lives forever.
  • Quarrel over the cruelty of the chosen one. Experts do not get tired of repeating common truths that it makes no sense to endure and forgive such things. The one who hit once rarely will not repeat his “feat” a second time after forgiving his unacceptable behavior towards a partner.
In most situations, it is necessary to pause when quarreling with a loved one in order to let the heat of passion cool down. However, each case of partner relationships is individual, so you should coordinate your actions based on the couple's own experience of communicating. For example, for some, quarrels become just an excuse to instantly reconcile in bed.

Ways to reconcile two parties after a quarrel

When deciding to smooth out the conflict and reunite with your soulmate, it is necessary to take into account the fact that women and men react differently to attempts to get closer to them after a quarrel.


In most cases, it is the fair sex that first goes to resolve the conflict. Psychologists recommend ladies to eliminate the problems that have arisen in a couple as follows:
  1. Wisdom. A frank game on the feelings of a beloved man will ultimately lead to nothing good. Repeated accusations will only exacerbate the situation, which may end in the separation of the couple. It is necessary to frankly tell your chosen one about your claims in such a way as not to infringe on his manhood.
  2. The element of seduction. Interest in the intimate plan of your partner will not hurt any woman who is in a quarrel with him. In some couples, conflict is artificially provoked in order to diversify their relationship. Sexologists say that at the height of another scandal, a woman can bring it to naught if she puts her charms into play.
  3. Pausing. Representatives of the fair sex often, in a fit of righteous anger, throw out a large amount of accumulated negativity on their partner. Psychologists recommend that after another quarrel with a chosen one, take a walk in the park or visit a store. After the voiced emotional respite, you can return to the conversation no longer in a raised tone.
  4. innocent flirting. No man who values ​​his woman will tolerate encroachment on her side by competitors. Even after the most stormy showdown, he will watch the life of his woman with increased attention. If you take advantage of this factor and cause your loved one to be jealous, then he will quickly try to restore his position on the love front.
  5. Image change. First of all, this must be done for yourself, so that the effect of the manipulations performed with your appearance reaches the maximum effect. A woman who loves her reflection in the mirror will be able to reconcile with her partner in a fairly short period of time due to the interest aroused in herself.
  6. Respect for partner's hobby. Some conflicts in a couple occur because of a different concept of joint leisure. Understanding how to put up after a quarrel, you need to read the relevant literature about the passion of your beloved man. With a frank conversation with him, you can show off knowledge in this area, which will definitely help the couple reunite.
Any woman should remember that with any of her wrong actions, the mechanism of the so-called "evil tongues" in the form of gossip can be launched. Therefore, when deciding to make peace with your chosen one, you must carefully evaluate the plan of your further actions in order to reunite with your loved one and not spoil your own reputation.


Representatives of the stronger sex like to act ahead, which in this case is not the right solution to the problem. Looking for options on how to properly put up after a quarrel, experts advise using the following measures to influence the heart of the chosen one:
  • Maximum measure. A woman, as you know, loves with her ears. This factor has a double effect when it comes to a lady in love with an offender. A guilty boyfriend can earn forgiveness through a correct explanation of his act, which painfully hurt his soulmate.
  • Help with household matters. If a couple lives together, then you can surprise your beloved woman with a general cleaning of the home or buying things that the family needs. Each lady will appreciate such efforts, which will testify to the partner's attention to their joint life.
  • . Some women often save on themselves if they want to purchase some item of interest to them. In a quarrel, it's time for a man to fork out so that, along with confessions of his guilt, present to his beloved thing that she dreamed of.
  • Use of Internet resources. Not a single lady will remain indifferent if, after a conflict, her man starts writing gentle SMS messages to her. It will not hurt him to also show his activity in social networks visited by his beloved.
  • Help friends beloved. If mutual acquaintances are positive towards the quarreling couple, then their support will be simply priceless. It is necessary to tell them honestly about the problem that has arisen (omitting intimate details) so that they help to reconcile the two sides.
  • romance. Every woman likes to be beautifully looked after. A bouquet of your favorite flowers, dinner in a cafe or restaurant and a short trip through a beautiful area are the main components of the program for a man who wants to make peace with his beloved. Boat trips have proven themselves well, where an offended woman can not only listen to apologies from her man, but also internally relax to the light sound of the wave.
  • Using billboards. Recently, it has become a fashionable trend to express your feelings in this way. If an offended lady sees a huge billboard with her image and a declaration of love from a guilty gentleman, then the ice in her heart will definitely melt.
  • Recording on asphalt. If there is no financial opportunity to design a billboard for your soulmate, you can resort to standard, but no less effective methods. If the quarrel did not occur because of the betrayal of a partner, then any woman will smile when she sees the inscriptions on the pavement from her lover.
  • Elimination of irritants. In this case, we will talk about banal jealousy, which often destroys even the strongest relationships. If a woman dear to her heart is infuriated by the friendship of her beloved with a former classmate or colleague, then a man should think about priorities in this matter. Or try to introduce and make friends women with each other.
  • Journey. If it is possible to carry out this event, it is necessary to take advantage of the opportunity. A change of scenery quite often helps a couple in the conflict phase to find mutual understanding. However, a man must organize everything in such a way that a ticket to exotic places becomes a pleasant and unexpected surprise for the lady of his heart.

How to avoid fights between lovers


Any conflict can be prevented with a competent approach to the problem. To avoid strained relationships in a couple, you must adhere to the following plan of action:
  1. Refusal of pressure on the individual. Some subjects consider their point of view to be the only correct version for studying their life experience. However, when a love affair arises, such a formulation sometimes works exclusively according to the relationship scheme in the form of “tyrant - victim”. As a result, a conflict arises, which then goes beyond a simple misunderstanding. If you want to maintain a relationship, you must learn to respect each other.
  2. Rejection of stereotypes. There is an opinion that in order to create relationships, only people of different temperaments connect their hearts (plus reaches for minus). Such an assumption is not true, therefore, in order to maintain relations, one should somewhat reduce one's ambitions.
  3. "Grinding" to a partner. In rare cases, the choleric will find common interests with the phlegmatic. Emotionally active persons will most of all like to jump with a parachute or explore the mountain peaks. More calm natures will be horrified by such prospects offered to them, which can lead to a quarrel in a couple. However, although love prefers equals, for the sake of serious feelings, it is worth considering the preferences of your soulmate.
  4. Jealousy control. In this case, psychologists like to quote W. Shakespeare, who called her "a monster with green eyes." Insecure people and frank owners quite often conflict with their soulmate because of the seeming betrayal on her part. The advice of psychologists in this case says that you need to believe in yourself and your chosen one.
  5. Analysis of misunderstandings. It is this situation that can destroy a couple that could not resolve the situation in hot pursuit. The factor “someone said wrong, and someone heard wrong” is one of the reasons for the appearance of a stone wall between loving hearts. It is better to make it a rule to stop and talk heart to heart before the conflict.
  6. Control over your words. Very often, jokers or simply ill-mannered individuals sin with this. Any criticism of a woman's appearance is perceived by her very painfully. Not every man calmly listens to a derogatory verdict regarding his solvency as a representative of the stronger sex. In order not to think about how to avoid quarrels, it is worth controlling your words and thoughts.
  7. Rebuff to slander. Some people are haunted by watching someone else's happiness. Envious couples can be both friends of a woman and friends of a man. This is especially dangerous for the relationship of lovers, when slanderers on both sides join forces. The only way out is to learn to trust each other.
  8. Destruction of old accounts. If the partners have already gone through the phase of reconciliation more than once, then it is possible that they have not forgotten past grievances. At the slightest similar situation, the conflict can flare up with renewed vigor, which ends in a long quarrel between lovers. In this case, there is a wonderful saying "Whoever remembers the old - that eye is out." The past must be left in the past, and not dragged with baggage through life.
  9. . Frank flirting works very well if a man or woman is looking for a soul mate for a full-fledged relationship. However, already in an established couple, the search for a new partner due to boredom can end in the separation of lovers forever. If there is a reason to look for and choose a new chosen one, then it is better to immediately part with the person who does not suit you.
  10. Conflict resolution with family. The problem of such a plan will never arise if both partners are orphans and without the presence of any next of kin. Otherwise, the family may not like the choice of their loved one, so they begin to criticize the person that they did not like. The solution is to keep communication to a minimum, talk more about the positive qualities of a loved one, and ideally live separately.
  11. Prohibition on the division of power. In any couple, someone is trying to dominate the relationship. Psychologists say that spiritually equal people become friends rather than lovers. Therefore, clarifying the question of who is the boss in the house can lead to a quarrel between partners. Here it is important to be flexible, to be able to yield or correctly defend one's opinion without becoming personal.
  12. Rejection of dogma in raising children. If the spouses already have a child, then the fact that it is because of him that a conflict between lovers will begin is not ruled out. Someone wants to raise children according to the Makarenko system, and someone likes Craig's recommendations. Chief among the methods of approach is unity. You need to look for the "golden mean" and reasonably defend your ideas.
  13. Ethical Compliance. The betrayal of a loved one can be both moral and physical. In both cases, this is a serious reason not only for a quarrel, but also for a complete break in relations. If there is no goal to maintain communication, then there is no problem. If the couple wants to be together, then only a loyal attitude, support and love can work wonders in case of disagreements.
How to put up after a quarrel - look at the video:


Reconciliation after a quarrel with a loved one is an art that both sides of the conflict must possess. Only in this case, the couple can claim a long existence in the format of the relationship that has arisen. A frank discussion of the problem, the ability to ask for forgiveness and forgive - these are the golden dogmas on which you can build a happy family.