Where and how to file for divorce if you have a minor child? Divorce with children: process, procedure and registration
It has long been no secret that about half of all marriages break up. The reasons may be different, as a rule, spouses realize that they simply are not suitable for each other. Naturally, we can talk about domestic violence, alcoholism, drug addiction and other unpleasant things. But the discussion here is not about how to make this decision, but what to do after that. How to file for divorce if you have a minor child? How to divide jointly acquired property? Where to contact?
File for divorce
Declaring the breakdown of a marriage is like admitting your own inability to maintain a relationship. At least that's what some people think. But often it is simply impossible or not desirable to maintain relationships. And the first thing you need to do after making this difficult decision is to talk to the second participant. Perhaps there is another way out of this situation that will save the family. If not, then you need to immediately understand one thing: both are always to blame. You cannot shift responsibility for all the mistakes made in a relationship onto one person. There is always a second one who is equally guilty for allowing all this to continue.
Of course, there is no need to rush. Decisions made on the spur of the moment, after a quarrel or argument, rarely lead to anything good. Thinking about how to file for divorce if you have children at such a critical moment is not the smartest or most balanced decision. On the other hand, if it is clear that staying together is unbearable, there is no point in continuing this torture. We need to draw conclusions and move on.
So, where to file for divorce? And what do you really need? In order to do this, you don’t need to do so many actions: if there are no children or property disputes, go to the registry office, but if there is any of this, you will have to go to court. This does not mean that a real drama will play out in the meeting room; as a rule, everything is much simpler and more prosaic.
Preparation of documents
In the simplest case, the package of papers should be like this:
- statement;
- original marriage certificate;
- receipt of payment of duty.
But this will all be limited if there are no disagreements and no children. A set of documents should be submitted to the registry office, and a month later you should pick up the certificate.
Filing a divorce if you have children will require more documents:
- statement of claim (2 copies);
- marriage certificate (original);
- receipt of payment of the duty;
- birth certificate of the child/children (original and copy)/
Options: Civil registry office or court?
The institution through which the divorce procedure will be carried out is influenced by several factors that you need to think about before filing for divorce. If there is a minor child or disputes over property, then, alas, a simple procedure is not enough. The duration of family relationships does not affect the choice of institution in any way. So, where to file for divorce: to the registry office or court?
Naturally, the procedure will be much simpler through the first institution - you just need to write an application, and with mutual consent, in a month the husband and wife will become strangers to each other. In addition, without the direct participation of the court, you can get a divorce if one of the spouses is declared incompetent, untimely absent, or sentenced to a term of more than 3 years (not suspended).
If someone alone does not agree to break off the relationship, there are disputes over jointly acquired property or common children, then a more complex process awaits. Fortunately, in Russia the divorce procedure is carried out through a magistrate, which simplifies the matter somewhat. If there are no serious disagreements between the spouses, then this actually turns into a formality.
Statement of claim
Since, as a rule, there are no difficulties with the registry office, it is advisable to consider only filing documents with the court. But before you think about how to file for divorce if you have children, you need to write a statement of claim. This is the main document that will set out the plaintiff’s entire position regarding the divorce process. It can be written in a fairly free form, guided by Article 21 of the Family Code, or you can consult with a knowledgeable lawyer who will tell you which wording is best to use. This is especially true if there is disagreement.
The application must justify your position regarding the child’s place of residence and, if necessary, the payment of alimony. In addition, you can indicate your desire to return your maiden name.
And yet writing this statement is not that difficult. Having done this, you can already think about where and how to file for divorce. What specific institution is doing this?
Where to contact?
If we talk about the registry office, then there should be no questions, but problems often arise with the choice of court. Where and how to file for divorce if there is a minor child is decided by the plaintiff. He can transfer the claim at his place of residence or where the defendant resides. The first option is often preferable, because you will even have to spend less time traveling to the public office, which is important if the proceedings last long enough.
At each visit, including the moment when the plaintiff comes to file for divorce, you must have an identification card with you. Each time the judge will make sure that those persons who are directly affected by the proceedings are present at the hearing.
Disputes and additional claims
It does not always happen that the parties part ways without much debate, having voluntarily agreed to divide their property and come to an agreement. Often the procedure called “filing for divorce” is a long process of disputes about who owns the property or car, how to divide them, and who will receive the debts. And each member of a broken family strives to bite off a larger piece of the former family nest. But it is worth remembering that, in general, all property and liabilities should be divided in half. However, disputes of this kind, although they accompany the divorce, are still considered by the court separately.
Complex and special cases
All problems and possible disagreements can be resolved both before marriage and while still in it, by drawing up a special agreement. According to it, the division of property can occur in completely different shares, as long as both spouses sign it. The name of this document is a marriage contract, and it is becoming increasingly popular
If the spouses do not bother to draw up such a document, their disputes can drag on for a very long time and cost a lot of money and nerves. For one thing, this paper is both good and bad - it does not regulate issues of raising children. Therefore, divorce if there is a minor child can still become a difficult matter if agreement between the parents is not reached.
Meetings
Shortly after the secretariat accepts the documents, both parties will be notified of the date and time of the scheduled trial. If there are very young children in the family, then preliminary conversations are held, during which it becomes clear whether the decision on divorce is mature and final. If both spouses agree with this, then the court has no right to be interested in the reasons that prompted two adults to divorce.
In the simplest case, there will be only one court hearing, and it will actually become a formality. During its course, it will be found out whether the decision of one of the spouses about the breakup of the family has changed, whether there are new circumstances that allow us to say that common economic activity has been resumed, etc. And if the parties have no objections, then the verdict will be unequivocal - divorce. Sometimes it can even be carried out in absentia, without the presence of the participants.
Everything is much more complicated if there are disputes over property, the place of residence of children, or if the decision to divorce was unilateral, and the second spouse does not agree with it. In this case, you will have to be patient and find arguments to defend your position.
Controversy about children
Russian courts tend to side with the mother regarding who children should stay with. But this does not mean that the father cannot ensure that the child lives with him. True, this will require a lot of arguments to convince the judge that such a decision will be in the interests of the child. A mother may have bad habits, such as alcoholism and drug addiction, which make it impossible for her to fully raise her child, because she may not be able to provide him with an adequate standard of living. But before filing for divorce, if there is a minor child, the father must clearly understand that the truth is on his side, and he has convincing arguments. Practice shows that, having proven that they are right, an increasing number of fathers are gaining the right to raise their children by living with them, rather than meeting on weekends. But, unfortunately, there are not too many such cases yet.
The divorce procedure, if there are children, can be very long, or it can be very simple. It depends on how willing the ex-spouses are to compromise and discussion. After all, it is illegal to restrict one parent from communicating with a child. Another question is how much time he will allocate for this. The process of divorce in the presence of children, when there are disagreements, can be very painful, especially for the latter, so it is better if an agreement is reached out of court. It is worth remembering this and trying not to injure them again.
Important Features
Former spouses do not always maintain more or less good relationships; this is even more of an exception to the rule. That is why, especially if there are property disputes, you cannot acquire any property before receiving an extract from the court decision. Otherwise, the former spouse may also apply for its division, because for another month after the meeting the marriage is not considered dissolved.
In addition, there is one more subtlety - if a woman gives birth to a child within 300 days after her divorce, paternity will automatically be attributed to her ex-husband. It is extremely difficult to avoid this, in some cases you even have to go to court and order a DNA examination. So it’s better not to create unnecessary problems for yourself.
Further actions
A month after the court hearing, you need to pick up the relevant document. It is better to call the secretariat in advance, because sometimes it takes some time to process the extract and you need to order it. With this paper you need to go to the registry office, whose employee will issue a certificate of divorce and put a divorce stamp in your passport. If you wish, you can also begin the name change procedure to return to your maiden name.
Afterwards, if necessary, you need to change the child’s permanent registration address so that it coincides with the actual one, that is, if he lives with his mother, it is better that he is registered there. Otherwise, the father will have the opportunity in court to argue for refusal to pay alimony on the grounds that the child allegedly lives with him, and then this burden may even fall on the woman.
Psychological component
Of course, legal confirmation of the fact of family breakdown is not a very pleasant procedure. Divorce in the presence of minor children also involves a third party in this process, for whom everything that happens is scary and incomprehensible. Just yesterday the parents lived together, life was simple and almost carefree, but today they are fighting for the love of the child, quarreling, making scandals, dividing property. It is important to understand that children should not see all the ins and outs. Of course, it is also not easy for spouses to go through this, but it is necessary to save face, never scold the other parent in front of the child, do not get personal, but maintain polite neutrality. It is important for children to know that mom and dad still love them, even if they no longer want to live with each other. Only by maintaining the most correct relationships can you protect a child from serious psychological trauma, anxiety and neuroses.
