Posthumous work of Kozma Prutkov. Selected short obituary and two posthumous works by Kozma Petrovich Prutkov

In Russian literature there is a certain mysterious classic. His complete works (with the obligatory addition of a portrait) are constantly reprinted, his biography has been thoroughly studied; significant literary works are devoted to him. The address in St. Petersburg is also known: Kazanskaya, 28 (in Soviet times - Plekhanov), in the building of the Assay Office of the Mining Department of the Ministry of Finance (now here is the Assay Supervision Inspectorate of the Ministry of Finance of the Russian Federation). The famous writer occupied a state-owned apartment of eighteen rooms in this house, since he was the director of this state institution. Kazanskaya Street originates from the Kazan Cathedral on Nevsky Prospekt. Therefore, we are talking about the very center of the capital of the empire. It would be time to install a memorial plaque on the house. Obviously, the only constraint is that this writer never existed. Many probably already guessed that we are talking about Kozma Petrovich Prutkov.

This name was first mentioned in print in 1854. But even earlier, as follows from the biography attached to the complete collection of works, Kozma Prutkov wrote a lot "on the table", not dreaming of literary glory. He was prompted to publish his works by a chance acquaintance with four young people: Alexei Tolstoy and his cousins ​​- Vladimir, Alexander and Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov. The circumstances of their convergence are extremely interesting and require a detailed story.

In 1850, Kozma Petrovich Prutkov took an extended vacation with the intention of going abroad (primarily, of course, to Paris). After some deliberation, he decided, in order to save money, to find himself a companion who spoke foreign languages. The corresponding announcement was placed in the "Northern Bee". On the same night, at about four o'clock, he was awakened by a valet who reported that some young people (two of them in court uniforms) were demanding a general. I had to get out of bed and, in a dressing gown and a nightcap, go out into the hallway, where strangers were really waiting for Kozma Petrovich: a tall hero in an embroidered gold uniform introduced himself as Count Tolstoy, the rest - Zhemchuzhnikovs. One of them inquired whether he had read the advertisement of the venerable master of the house that day in the newspaper. Kozma Prutkov confirmed that it was his. In response, the young man said that they had come specially to say that none of them could go abroad at the moment. After these words, the visitors bowed politely and left.

It is clear that Kozma Petrovich was no longer up to sleep. In the morning he remembered that Count Tolstoy was the closest friend of the heir to the throne, and the Zhemchuzhnikov brothers were the sons of a senator and a privy councillor. However, that same evening, all four came to him with apologies for their trick. Just the night before, they were at a court ball and could not part until Alexander Zhemchuzhnikov remembered the announcement in the Northern Bee, which accidentally caught his eye. Kozma Petrovich invited the young people into the living room and, over tea, read them several of his poems. They were enthusiastically received. Young people unanimously began to assure Kozma Petrovich that it was simply criminal to bury such a talent in the ground.

It is immediately worth noting that the director of the Assay Tent always called himself Kozma (even Kosma), and not, as is customary, Kuzma. By this, he seemed to emphasize that he was from the same breed as Saints Cosmas and Damian or Cosmas Minin.

One of the Zhemchuzhnikov brothers - Alexei Mikhailovich - subsequently (like Tolstoy) became a famous poet, but "did not go into the classics." The other brothers - Alexander and Vladimir - also wrote poetry, but this was just a tribute to youth. In the history of Russian literature, they remained the only "creators of Kozma Prutkov." Subsequently, Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov wrote to the famous historian and literary critic Alexander Nikolaevich Pypin:

“We were all young then, and the “mood of the circle”, in which Prutkov’s creations arose, was cheerful, but with an admixture of a satirical-critical attitude to modern literary phenomena and to the phenomena of modern life. Although each of us had his own special political character, all of us were tightly connected by one common feature: the complete absence of "official" in ourselves, and, as a result, a great sensitivity to everything "official". This feature helped us - at first, regardless of our will and quite unintentionally - to create the type of Kozma Prutkov, who is so state-of-the-art that neither his thought nor his feeling is accessible to any so-called topic of the day, if attention is not paid to it from the official point of view . He is ridiculous because he is completely innocent. He seems to say in his creations: "everything human is alien to me." Later, as this type became clear, its official character began to be emphasized. So, in his "projects" he is a deliberately state-owned person.

I must say that for their hoax, young people made, one might say, a brilliant find. The assay business (determining impurities in precious metals and applying special brands to them) was established by decree of Peter I of February 13, 1700. A fee was levied for the brand, which was what the Assay Office was supposed to do. The well-known economist A.N. Guryev explained at one time why such a comic character as Kozma Petrovich Prutkov could be in the place of the head of this institution:

“In the old ministerial system, directors of only departments were appointed, they were not“ fools ”. The Prutkov company needed an “authoritative fool,” and they chose the director of the Assay Office remarkably correctly and witty. Already the verbal composition of this title detracts from the eyes of the reader of the “tent director”, but for people familiar with bureaucratic institutions, it struck not in the eyebrow, but in the eye. The fact is that in almost every ministry, in addition to the institutions that were part of the central administration, there were also special institutions, also of a central nature, but with purely executive functions. They were not engaged in the most important business of the ministries (and, consequently, the directors of departments) - the drafting of laws, but they conducted the business. In the Ministry of Finance, such institutions were the Assay Office and the Commission for the Redemption of Public Debts. Both institutions were located on Kazanskaya Street in state-owned houses, with huge apartments for commanding generals. Honored fools were made directors of these institutions, who could not be missed as directors of departments. The rank of general, a large salary of maintenance and a huge apartment of eighteen rooms, of course, made these well-deserved fools very authoritative.

So, the expression "Prutkov's company" has already flashed, but in literary criticism it is more customary to speak of the "Prutkov circle"; This definition will be followed further. The "Prutkovsky circle" was a kind of "joyful union" of four young people. Many anecdotes were told about their tricks, most of which have come down to our time (of course, thanks to the fame of Kozma Prutkov). In fact, such a circle was quite consistent with the spirit of the first half of the 19th century, when the talented youth of the nobility "played tricks" and thus found a way out for their young, unspent forces. In the 1820s, Pushkin, Anton Delvig and Pavel Nashchokin "tricked up", in the 1830s - Lermontov and Alexei Stolypin-Mongo. Close friends of the great poets are now remembered as reckless daring, at any moment ready to take part in any risky adventure. In the Perovsky family, the tendency to "leprosy", one might say, was hereditary. An attentive witness of the era, Pyotr Andreevich Vyazemsky, recalled in the "Old Notebook":

“Alexey Perovsky (Pogorelsky) was ... a successful hoaxer. He once assured his colleague (who later became famous for several historical writings) that he was a great master of some Masonic lodge and, by his power, ranks him among its members. Here he invented various funny trials, through which the new convert dutifully and willingly passed. Finally, he forced him to sign that he had not killed the beaver.

Perovsky wrote amfiguri (amphigouri), comic, funny nonsense. Here are some verses from it:

Avdul vizier

bubble on forehead

And cherishes and cherishes;

And Papa's son.

Taking an orange

I don't remember what it does. But about a dozen verses were written in such verses. He brings them to Antonsky, the then rector of the university and chairman of the Society of Lovers of Literature, introduces him to his work and says that he wants to read his poems at the first public meeting of the Society. It should not be forgotten that at that time Count Alexei Kirillovich Razumovsky was a trustee of Moscow University or already the Minister of Public Education. One can imagine the embarrassment of the timid Antonsky. He, blushing and stammering, says: “Your poems are very sweet and intricate; but, it seems, it is not the right place to read them in a learned assembly.” Perovsky insists that he wants to read them, assuring them that there is nothing anti-censorship in them. Explanations and bickering continued for half an hour. Poor Antonsky turned pale, blushed, was exhausted almost to the point of fainting.

And here is another leprosy of Perovsky. His friend was the groom. The bride's patron was a so-so man. Perovsky assured him that he, too, was passionately in love with his friend's fiancee, that he was not responsible for himself and was ready for any desperate trick. The votchim, touched and frightened by such a confession, admonishes him to come to his senses, to overcome himself. Perovsky Pushcha indulges in its lamentations and passionate rantings. The votchim does not leave him, guards, does not let him out of his sight in order to prevent some kind of trouble in time. Once the whole family was walking in the garden. Votchim goes hand in hand with Perovsky, who continues to whisper his complaints and desperate confessions to him; finally breaks out of his hands and throws himself into the pond, past which they were walking. Perovsky knew that this pond was not deep, and was not afraid of drowning; but the pond was dirty and covered with green slime. It was necessary to see how he got out of it like a mermaid and how Mentor looked after his ill-fated Telemachus: he dressed him with his dressing gown, gave him warm chamomile to drink, and so on and so on.

Vyazemsky cites from memory only one verse (and even that is incorrect) from a rather large poem by Alexei Perovsky. It sounds like this in full:

Abdul vizier

bubble on forehead

He cares and cherishes his own.

Bayle geometr.

Taking a thermometer

Sowing wheat in the field.

A Bonaparte

With a deck of cards

Hurries to Russia.

Sitting in a balloon

He is for Boston

Papa is invited.

But daddy's son

Taking an orange

He throws it in the father's nose.

And in the sea a whale

Looks at them

And picks in the nostrils.

Mohammed is here

Wearing a corset

And thirsty,

Water heating

And sitting down to them,

He gives them tea.

That's in vain, mosquito

To the samovar

Jumping up, sweating in the heat.

Selena is here

Taking a tourniquet in hand,

It warms his thighs.

flies station,

Strengthen your spirit

They clapped their hands

And Epictetus,

To change

Dance, put on galoshes.

Minister Pete

Sitting in the corner

And plays on the whistle.

But the pop comes in

And, removing the coat.

He sits politely.

Voltaire is an old man.

Taking off your wig

Whisks eggs in it

And Jean Racine

Like a good son

Crying out of pity.

It seems that it was from these verses that “prutkovism” entered Russian poetry. But it should be recognized as the initiator not of Alexei Perovsky, but of the famous Moscow wit Sergei Alekseevich Neyolov. He orally responded in verse to any event that took place in Moscow. Neyolov poured impromptu everywhere - both in the English club, and at balls, and at bachelor's feasts. His poems were sometimes "off the record" and rarely recorded. Often they were parodies of popular works by famous poets. Pushkin and Vyazemsky paid tribute to his polished language. Sergey Sobolevsky and especially Ivan Myatlev became true followers of Neyelov, whose poem “Sensations and remarks of Mrs. Kurdyukova abroad” were read in the 19th century. Pushkin's friend Sobolevsky entered the history of Russian literature with his oral epigrams. Myatlev was a master of the so-called "macaronic verse", which was equally bilingual; foreign (most often French) words and phraseological units were inserted into Russian poems. This produced a great comic effect, since, as in the poem about the Tambov landowner, Mrs. Kurdyukova, verses were put into the mouth of a person who did not really know either one or the other language.

The main ringleader of the "Prutkov circle" was Alexander Zhemchuzhnikov. Subsequently, he rose to the ranks of major ranks, but until the end of his life he remained a caustic wit and joker, who did not disregard any of the absurdities he encountered. Here are examples of his pranks, which Prince Vladimir Meshchersky cites in his memoirs (the objects of the young man's buffoonery were the all-powerful ministers of justice and finance - Viktor Nikitich Panin and Fyodor Pavlovich Vronchenko):

“Every God's day along Nevsky Prospekt, at five o'clock in the afternoon, one could meet a tall old man, straight as a pole, in a coat, in a top hat on a small longish head, with glasses on his nose and with a stick always under his arm. This walk is all the more interesting because everyone saw Count Panin, but he never saw anyone, looking straight ahead into space: the whole world did not exist for him during this walk, and when someone bowed to him, the count mechanically raised his hat, but did not turning and not moving his head, he continued to look into the distance ahead of him. From here, at that time, an anecdote began to circulate about the famous comedian Zhemchuzhnikov, who once dared to dare to break the monotony of Count Panin's walk: seeing him approaching, he pretended to be looking for something on the sidewalk, until Count Panin reached him and, not expecting an obstacle, he was suddenly stopped in his course and, of course, bending over, threw himself over Zhemchuzhnikov, who then, as if nothing had happened, took off his hat and, respectfully apologizing, said that he was looking for a dropped pin on the panel.

No less comical is the anecdote about Zhemchuzhnikov, concerning the daily walks of Finance Minister Vronchenko. He walked daily along the Palace Embankment at 9 o'clock in the morning. Zhemchuzhnikov also had a fantasy of taking a walk at this time, and, passing by Vronchenko, whom he personally did not know, he stopped, took off his hat and said: Minister of Finance, spring of activity - and then passed on.

He began to do this every morning, until Vronchenko complained to Chief Police Officer Galakhov, and Zhemchuzhnikov, under pain of expulsion, was charged not to disturb the Minister of Finance anymore.

The above story about the first acquaintance of the “Prutkov circle” with the director of the Assay Chamber is extremely reminiscent of their undertaking, the victim of which was the famous military writer and court historiographer Alexander Ivanovich Mikhailovsky-Danilevsky (by the way, a good friend of the father of the Zhemchuzhnikov brothers). One day, late at night, they raised him from his bed and declared that they had arrived from the palace in order to inform him that Nicholas I demanded to be presented with a copy of The History of the Patriotic War of 1812 by the morning exit; and this must be done by the author himself (that is, Mikhailovsky-Danilevsky).

On another occasion, one of the “Prutkovites” in the uniform of an adjutant wing traveled around all the famous St. Petersburg architects with an order to appear in the Winter Palace in the morning, since St. Isaac's Cathedral collapsed and the emperor was in terrible anger.

Here is another anecdotal case. The “Prutkovites” came to the performances of the visiting German troupe with huge dictionaries and, during the action, noisily rustled the pages, as if looking for an incomprehensible word. Sometimes one of them shouted at the top of his voice in the direction of the Warten Sie stage: (wait. - V.N.). In general, the Germans especially got it. At night, the naughty drove around the German bakers and woke up with the question: do they have baked bread? When they heard an affirmative answer, they thoughtfully said that this was wonderful, since many people are generally deprived of a piece of bread.

Chronologically, the first work of Kozma Prutkov, included in his complete works, is the one-act buffoon play "Fantasy", which even happened to see the lights of the imperial stage. “Fantasy” is the fruit of the joint work of Alexei Tolstoy and Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov (who has already hit the stage of the Alexandrinsky Theater with his “comedy from high society life” “Strange Night”).

For A. K. Tolstoy, this was by no means the first experience of such writing. In 1837-1838, in letters from Krasny Rog to his friend Nikolai Adlerberg, he included a number of comic dramatic scenes with numerous allusions to the big world, now defying decipherment. In one letter, he even asks "to destroy these lines after reading them, because I can make enemies among the most prominent families of the empire."

According to Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov, they wrote "Fantasy" in the same room at different tables. The co-authors broke the play into an equal number of scenes; Tolstoy took the first half, Zhemchuzhnikov took the second. The latter recalled:

“The case was not without difficulty. Imagine that during the reading, two phenomena, one of which belonged to Tolstoy and the other to me, turned out to be inconvenient for staging. You remember, of course, in Fantasia there is a short intermission, when the stage remains empty for some time, clouds and a thunderstorm come in, then a pug runs across the stage, the storm subsides and the characters appear on the stage. This intermission was due to the fact that with Tolstoy the appearance ended with the departure of all the actors, while the following appearance of mine began with the appearance on the stage of them again all together. We thought for a long time what to do, and finally came up with this intermission. The finale of the play (probably the final monologue of Kutilo-Zavaldaisky) was completed by Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov.

Apparently, it was at this time that the pseudonym of the "group of authors" arose. Alexey Zhemchuzhnikov continues his memoirs:

“When we had already completed everything, we did not know what pseudonym to sign this common play of ours. At that time Kuzma Frolov served as our valet, a fine old man, we all loved him very much. So my brother Vladimir and I say to him: “You know what, Kuzma, we wrote a book, and you give us your name for this book, as if you wrote it ... And everything that we get from the sale of this book, we will give you” . He agreed. “Well, he says, I, perhaps, agree, if you really want to ... But, he says, let me ask you, gentlemen, is the book smart or not?” We all burst out laughing. "Oh no! We say: the book is stupid, stupid. Look, our Kuzma frowned. “And if, he says, the book is stupid, then I, he says, do not want my name to be signed under it. I don’t need your money either, he says… “Huh? How would you like it? When brother Alexei (country A. Tolstoy) heard this answer from Kuzma, he almost died of laughter and gave him 50 rubles. “Na, he says, this is for your wit.” Well, then the three of us decided to take the pseudonym not of Kuzma Frolov, but of Kuzma Prutkov. Since then, we began to write all sorts of jokes, poems, aphorisms under one common pseudonym, Kuzma Prutkov. Here is the origin of our pseudonym.

At first glance it seems that this is just a "literary tradition". So, it is not entirely clear: why, if a play was written, then we are talking about a book. (It can be assumed that the Prutkovites already had far-reaching plans.) However, Kuzma Frolov is a real person. He is mentioned in the diary of Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov. In addition, in the memoirs of Sofya Khitrovo, the niece of Sofya Andreevna Tolstaya, known only fragmentarily, this old valet, who, together with Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov, stayed in Krasny Rog in the winter of 1865, is spoken of precisely as Kuzma Prutkov.

Fantasia was hastily created in December 1850. On December 23, the play was presented to the directorate of the imperial theaters, on the 29th it was approved by the censors, transferred to the director Kulikov, and on January 8 of the following year it was staged. At the present time - dizzying pace!

The show ended in scandal. Present at the theater, Nicholas I, as soon as the dogs began to run around on the stage, defiantly got up from his seat and left. When he came out, he told the director of the imperial theaters, A. M. Gedeonov, that he had never seen such nonsense before, although he had to deal with a lot of nonsense. After the departure of the emperor, a hubbub arose in the auditorium. The situation was saved by the audience's favorite Alexander Martynov, who delivered the final monologue (by the way, those present mistook him for acting improvisation and saw off Martynov with applause). Be that as it may, "Fantasy" was immediately withdrawn from the repertoire.

More than thirty years later, Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov spoke about what happened in his diary: “Tsar Nikolai Pavlovich was at the first performance of Fantasia, written by Alexei Tolstoy and me. This play went to Maximov's benefit performance. Neither Tolstoy nor I were in the theatre. That evening there was some kind of ball to which we were both invited and which we should have been. In the theater were: Tolstoy's mother and my father with my brothers. Returning from the ball and curious to know how our play went, I woke my brother Lev and asked him about it. He replied that the audience had booed the play and that the sovereign, at the time when the dogs were running around the stage during a thunderstorm, got up from his seat and left the theater. Hearing this, I immediately wrote a letter to the director Kulikov that, having learned about the failure of our play, I ask him to remove it from the poster and that I am sure that I agree with my opinion of Count Tolstoy, although I am addressing him with my request without first . Tolstoy meeting. I gave this letter to Kuzma, asking him to take it down early tomorrow to Kulikov. The next day I woke up late, and an answer had already been received from Kulikov. It was short: “Your play and gr. Tolstoy has already been banned by the Highest Command. Let us note that the valet Kuzma Frolov also appears in this story.

There were many reasons for the failure. First of all - a bad game of actors who did not know their roles and hoped for a prompter. Kulikov was an experienced director, but he considered "Fantasy" to be just a trifling vaudeville, which dozens passed through his hands; so they rehearsed once or twice, no more. But most importantly, "Fantasy" turned out to be an evil and apt, albeit rude, parody of the dramatic production of that time, based on the numerous absurdities of positions and faces. In Fantasia, everything was taken to the point of absurdity, although any single phenomenon repeated what could easily be found in vaudeville that was successful. But the theatrical audience wanted to see just such vaudevilles on stage, and therefore a parody of them was doomed to indignant whistles and hisses.

As was customary at the time, Fantasia was presented along with other vaudeville acts; there were five of them and the play by the Prutkovites was the fourth in a row. The first three vaudevilles fully met the taste of the public, and naturally, after them, "Fantasy" seemed utter nonsense. The demonstrative departure from the theater of Nicholas I was the signal for an outburst of indignation. Perhaps it would have been even more deafening if the audience realized that the authors were deliberately laughing at her; but they were considered simply incompetent.

Again, the ill-fated "Fantasy" was staged only on April 23, 1909 by Nikolai Evreinov on the stage of the V. F. Komissarzhevskaya Theater in St. Petersburg. The performance was designed in the style of an elegant grotesque and this time completely satisfied the audience. It is characteristic that the poster announced: "Live dogs will run on the stage." There were no more (as far as is known) attempts to stage "Fantasy", but, despite its unsuccessful stage fate, this parody play happened to play a role similar to the role of other banned works of Russian literature. A. K. Tolstoy and A. M. Zhemchuzhnikov were the first to ridicule the then ridiculous repertoire of the national stage and, with caustic jokes, raised a serious question about the need to update it.

The first poems of Kozma Prutkov appeared on the pages of Nekrasov's Sovremennik in the autumn of 1851. These were the fables "Forget-me-nots and heels", "The conductor and the tarantula", "The heron and the racing droshky". It must be said that the fables were published in the text of an article by one of the magazine's editors, Ivan Panaev, "Notes of a New Poet on Russian Journalism." Panaev wrote that from among the numerous poems received by the editors, he singled them out as truly remarkable works. The fables were composed by the Zhemchuzhnikov brothers in the summer of the same year at the Pavlovka estate in the Oryol province. At first, Alexander Zhemchuzhnikov broke out with the fable "Forget-me-nots and commas", considering it just an ordinary joke; the rest have already become the fruits of collective creativity. Nobody thought about printing. But the “Prutkovites” were in the circle of Sovremennik, where they were repeatedly recited with general delight. The fables evoked Homeric laughter and asked themselves to appear on the pages of the magazine. Somebody's words have become a common joke, as if Zhemchuzhnikov's fables are superior to Krylov's fables. But, of course, not the fables of the great Krylov! By this time, the fable genre had degenerated and became the lot of minor poets who did not shine with talent. Myatlev's fables stand apart, they are completely "Prutkov's".

Then came a break for three years. Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov recalled in a letter to Alexander Nikolaevich Pypin:

“These fables have already given rise to some thoughts, which subsequently developed in my brother Alexei and in me to the personality of Prutkov; namely: when the mentioned fables were written, it was jokingly said that they prove the excess of praises to Krylov and others, because the fables now written are no worse than those. This joke was repeated on our return to St. Petersburg. and soon brought me with br. Alexey and gr. A. Tolstoy (brother Alexander was at that time in the service in Orenburg) to the idea of ​​writing from one person, capable of all kinds of creativity. This idea lured us, and the type of Kozma Prutkov was created. By the summer of 1853, when we were again living in the Yelets village, there were already quite a few such works; and in the summer they added the comedy "Blondes", written by br. Alexander with the assistance of brethren. Alexei and mine. In the autumn, by agreement with A. Tolstoy and brothers. my Alexei, I finally took up the editing of everything prepared and handed it over to Yves. Iv. Panaev for publication in Sovremennik.

Throughout 1854, Kozma Prutkov's opuses were published in this most popular magazine in Russia from issue to issue, and not only poems, but also Fruits of Thought and Excerpts from My Grandfather's Notes. The success exceeded all expectations. Russian literature knows no other example of such an amazing creative union of writers who managed to subordinate their individualities to a single goal.

Kozma Prutkov appeared at the right moment, when Benediktov (today this poet is rarely remembered and almost always as an epigone of romanticism) overshadowed Pushkin with his popularity. Something amazing happened. Nowadays, the objects of Kozma Prutkov's parodies have long been forgotten; they are only mentioned in the comments. But the Prutkov poems themselves live and are perceived as an imperishable literary monument. Addressing readers, the director of the Assay Office was offended by criticism that he was composing parodies. No, replied Kozma Prutkov, I write the same thing as others, and if they are poets, then I am a poet. Kozma Prutkov became equal among the middle-class poets of his time, but they also shaped the literary process. However, let's make a reservation. Kozma Prutkov was far from equal in their ranks; he surpassed them. No wonder Alexey Zhemchuzhnikov at the end of his life complained that the creations of Kozma Prutkov diverge much better than his own works.

Almost half of the entire Prutkov corpus was published in five issues of Sovremennik for 1854 in the Literary Jumble section under the heading Kozma Prutkov's Leisure. In the Nekrasov circle, the last seven years of the reign of Nicholas I (1848-1855) were perceived as an era of timelessness. After the European revolutions of 1848 and the affairs of the Petrashevists, it was impossible to discuss any social issues, even those that were freely discussed several years ago. It remained only to slander in his rather narrow circle. But the gloomy mood that prevailed could not be permanent; it was inevitably interrupted by jokes and practical jokes, which were most often clothed in poetic form. A whole handwritten library of such “pranks” has been created. The creations of Kozma Prutkov came in handy.

A legitimate question is inevitable: how big is A. K. Tolstoy's contribution to the collective compendium? Among the poems, he fully owns: “Epigram No. 1 (“Do you like cheese” ...)”, “Junker Schmidt”, “Letter from Corinth”, “Ancient plastic Greek”, “Memory of the past”, “My portrait”, “Philosopher in the bath". Together with Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov, he wrote: "The Siege of Pamba", "The Valiant Studious", "The Desire to Be a Spaniard", "The Star and the Belly"; with Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov - “On the seaside”. In short, all the most artistic of Kozma Prutkov's poems. As for parodies of modern poets, A. K. Tolstoy parodies only the half-forgotten "Greek from the banks of the Dnieper" Nikolai Shcherbina; most of the rest of the opuses (including the famous "Junker Schmidt") are "imitations" of the numerous Russian provincial epigones of Heinrich Heine. The play "Fantasy" has already been mentioned earlier.

Apparently, A. K. Tolstoy came up with the idea of ​​the cycle “Excerpts from the Notes of My Grandfather”. Most likely, it was he - a wonderful master of stylization - who wrote most of the "Excerpts". It must be said that this parody of the outdated style of "notes of the past" was also topical at that time. Similar "historical materials" extracted from dusty chests overwhelmed the Moskvityanin magazine published by Mikhail Pogodin. The venerable historian simply adored them. By the way, at the first publication in the fourth issue of Sovremennik in 1854, “Excerpts from my grandfather’s notes” were dedicated to Pogodin.

It is difficult to say whether Fyodor Dostoevsky knew about the creative community of A. K. Tolstoy and the Zhemchuzhnikov brothers and whether he was initiated into the secret of the works of Kozma Prutkov; but he paid tribute to this writer in "Winter Notes on Summer Impressions":

“We now have one most remarkable writer, the beauty of our time, a certain Kuzma Prutkov. His entire shortcoming lies in his incomprehensible modesty: he has not yet published a complete collection of his works. Well, now, since he published in the mixture in Sovremennik a very long time ago already the Notes of My Grandfather. Imagine what this stout, seventy-year-old, Catherine's grandfather, who had seen the world, visited the Kurtags and near Ochakovo, could then write down, returning to his patrimony and set to work on his memories. Something must have been interesting to write down. Something that the man did not see! Well, it all consists of the following jokes:

"The witty reply of the Chevalier de Montbazon." Once upon a time, a young and very handsome maiden of the cavalier de Montbazon in the presence of the king calmly asked: 'My lord, what is hung to what, a dog to a tail or a tail to a dog?' , on the contrary, he answered in a constant voice: 'No one, madam, can take a dog by the tail, as well as by the head'. This answer to this king caused great pleasure, and that cavalier was left not without a reward for him.

You think that this is a swindle, nonsense, that there has never been such a grandfather in the world. But I swear to you that I personally, in my childhood, when I was ten years old, read one book of Catherine's time, in which I read the following anecdote. At the same time I learned it by heart - so he lured me - and since then I have not forgotten.

„A witty reply from the Chevalier de Rogan. It is known that the Chevalier de Rohan had a very bad breath. Once, being present at the awakening of the Prince de Condé, this latter said to him: “Step aside, Chevalier de Rogan, for you smell very bad.” To which this gentleman immediately replied: ‘This is not from me, most merciful prince, but from you, for you are just getting out of bed.’”

That is, imagine this landowner, an old warrior, perhaps still without an arm, with an old landowner, with a hundred domestic servants, with the Mitrofanushki children, going to the bathhouse on Saturdays and soaring to self-forgetfulness; and here he is, with spectacles on his nose, solemnly and solemnly reading such anecdotes in warehouses, and besides, he takes everything for the very real essence, almost as a duty in the service. And what a naive then belief in the efficiency and necessity of such European news ... They put on silk stockings, wigs, hung skewers - that's a European. And not only did all this not interfere, but even liked it. In fact, everything remained the same: putting de Rogan aside (who, however, was the only thing they knew about, that he smelled very badly from his mouth) aside and taking off his glasses, they dealt with their yard servants, treated them in the same patriarchal manner. family, they also fought at the stable of a small-scale neighbor, if he was rude, they also scoffed at the highest person.

At the first salvos of the Crimean War, Kozma Prutkov fell silent for almost five years. Its creators were no longer in the mood for jokes and literary play.

In the future, Alexei Konstantinovich Tolstoy was carried away by new ideas. He actually moved away from the "Prutkov circle". Among the works of Kozma Prutkov, which appeared at the turn of the 1850s and 1860s, there is no longer - except for two or three small poems - nothing significant that could be attributed to the pen of A. K. Tolstoy; everything else belongs to the Zhemchuzhnikovs.

Cit. Quoted from: Zhukov D.A. Kozma Prutkov and his friends. M., 1983. S. 313.

See the proverb: "To kill a beaver is not to see good."

Vyazemsky P. A. An old notebook. M., 2000. S. 206–207.

Meshchersky V.P. Memoirs. M., 2001. S. 52.

Cit. Quoted from: Zhukov D.A. Kozma Prutkov and his friends. M., 1983. S. 184.

Cit. Quoted from: Zhukov D.A. Kozma Prutkov and his friends. M., 1983. S. 213–214.

See: Lukyanov S. M. Vl. Solovyov in his youth. Pg., 1921. Book. III. Issue. 1. S. 238.

Alexander Evgrafovich Martynov (1816–1860) - an outstanding actor who played on the stage of the Alexandrinsky Theater in vaudeville, plays by A. N. Ostrovsky, I. S. Turgenev and others; considered one of the founders of the Russian school of stage realism. - Approx. ed.

Cit. Quoted from: Zhukov D.A. Kozma Prutkov and his friends. M., 1983. S. 185–186.

Applications

Section 1

Forewarning I know, reader, that you want to know why I was silent for so long? I understand your curiosity! Listen and understand: I will speak to you as a father speaks to his son. The society started talking about some new needs, about some new questions... I am the enemy of all so-called questions! I was indignant in my soul - and prepared!., I was preparing to hit modern society with a blow; but Messrs. Grigory Blank, Nikolay Bezobrazov and others warned me... Praise be to them, they saved me from shame! Taught by their experience, I decided to follow the society. I confess, reader: I even repeated other people's words against conviction!.. So more than three years passed. Time has shown me that I was afraid in vain. Our society has been slandered: it has changed only in appearance ... The wise one looks at the root: I looked at the root ... Everything is the same there: there is a lot of unfinished (d "inacheve)! .. This calmed me. I blessed fate and again took up the lyre!.. Reader, you understand me! Goodbye! Your well-wisher Kuzma Prutkov October 24, 1859 (annus, i). * * * Reader! Read about these notes in the preface, which I published in the past years in Yeralashi of Sovremennik. And now I print only "excerpts". I have already warned you a hundred times that there is an abyss of materials from your grandfather, but there is a lot of incomplete, unfinished in them. Your well-wisher Kuzma PrutkovMay 11, 1860 (Annus, f). Alphabet for children by Kosma Prutkov (composed by him) A. Anton is leading a goat B. Sick Julia. B. Bucket sale. G. Governor. D. Dunkirchen city. E. Yelagin island. AND. Sea of ​​Life. 3 . belated traveler. AND. Lieutenant engineer. TO. Correction Captain. L. Lemon juice. M. Martha is a tenant. H. Neutrality. ABOUT. District chief. P. Pelageya housekeeper. R. A skilled draftsman. C. Aggregate coexistence. T. A Tatar selling soap or bathrobes. At. Dance and logic teacher. F. Porcelain cup. X. Brave captain, C. Whole apple. H. Special Officer. W. Wool stocking. SCH. A chirping bird. E. Edward is a pharmacist. YU. Jupiter. I. Amber pipe. Kommersant. Y. b. Cold

Seeing Julia on the slope

steep mountain,

I hurried out of bed

And since then

I feel terrible runny nose

And broken bones

Not only at home I sneeze,

But also visiting.

I, endowed with rheumatism,

Even though he's getting old

But I dare not remove boldly

papier faillard,

* * *

I got up early one morning

Sat awake at the window;

The river played with mother-of-pearl,

I could see the mill

And it seemed to me that the wheels

In vain are given to the mill,

What is she, standing near the reach,

Pants would be better.

The hermit entered. publicly

And suddenly he said:

"Oh you, that in sorrow in vain

You grumble at God, man!”

He said, I shed a tear,

The old man began to console me...

Silvered with frosty dust

His beaver collar

* * *

Hitting my sister by accident with a spur,

“Ma sceur,” I quietly told her, “

Your step is uneven and slow

Has embarrassed me more than once

I'll take advantage of this moment

And let me know, ma sceur,

That I am adorned with an instrument,

Which call and sharp.

(Village Khvoskurovo) July 28.

Very hot. There must be many degrees in the shade...

I'm lying on a mountain under a birch,

I silently look at the birch,

But at the sight of a weeping birch

Tears welled up in my eyes.

Meanwhile, all the silence around

Only sometimes I suddenly hear

And even then very close, on the tree,

How quails crackle or whistle,

Until the evening I lay there,

I listened to the chirping of that il whistle,

And the ninth is only half

I fell asleep on the mezzanine without tea.

July 29.The heat is still...

The leaves turn yellow on the trees,

Clouds are flying in the sky,

But there is no rain and the heat is scorching.

Everything that grows, burns.

The plowman is sweating on the threshing floor,

And behind the sheaves aside

At the woman from day jobs

Sweat is also visible everywhere

But now the sun is fading,

A month comes out from behind the clouds

And lights up the way

All stars in the Milky Way.

Silence reigns everywhere

The moon rolls across the sky

But the light from other luminaries

Suddenly, the whole sky was lit up.

Suffering from a toothache

In a coat, with a bandaged cheek,

I look at the bright sky

I follow every star.

I started picking them all up.

Remember their names

And time went on,

And at the barn sentry

Every minute, that there is strength,

I've been pounding on the board for a long time.

Saying goodbye to nature, sick,

I went home slowly

And lay down at the ninth half

Again, no tea on the mezzanine.

August 1.Again in the shade, must be many degrees. When picking up a nail near the carriage house

Carnation, metal carnation,

Who was built into the world?

Whose hand bound you

What are you pointed for?

And where will you be! I guess

You can't give an answer;

I'm thinking for you

Interesting item!

On the wall of a simple hut

We'll see you

Where is the hand of the blind old woman

Will he suddenly hang up his ladle?

Or in the chambers of the lord

Hang on you with a string

There will be a bright picture

Or a tobacco pouch?

Or a parade-major's hat,

Ile serrated broadsword,

Bloodstained Spur

And a carpet bag?

Is Aesculapius flat

Will the Eternal give you shelter?

For hanging a uniform

Will they hit you with a hammer?

Maybe for a barometer

Suddenly he appoints you

And then for the thermometer,

Ile with recipes cardboard

Will he hang on you?

Or lapis infernalis,

Or a bag with lancets?

In general, so as not to fall

The things he needs.

Ile, lined under the jackboot,

Will you draw parquet,

Where is the first "all varieties,

Where is the stamp of comfort on everything,

Where is the envoy's portrait?

Or, on the contrary, a towel

Will you keep yourself

Yes, the caftan of the militia,

Departing to the army?

Consume cloves knows

Everyone to their own taste,

But while dreaming about it

(take and look)

This hat is waiting

My cap is on the mezzanine.

(I hurry upstairs.)

<С того света> G . Editor! Discharged with the rank of major general, I wanted something to do with my free time, which I had too much; and so I began to carefully read the newspapers, not limiting myself, as before, to reading only about productions and awards. Having become most interested in the articles on spiritualism, I had the idea, by my own experience, to investigate the phenomena about which I had read and which, I confess, to my simple mind seemed very stupid. I set to work with complete distrust, but what was my astonishment when, after several unsuccessful experiments, it turned out that I myself was a medium! I can’t find words to describe to you, gracious sir, the joy that seized me from the mere thought that from now on it’s possible for me, as a medium, to talk with smart and great people of the afterlife. Not being much in the sciences, but always trying to explain the inexplicable, I have long ago come to the conclusion that the soul of a dead person undoubtedly resides in the area where he especially aspired during his lifetime. On this basis, I tried to ask the deceased Dibich - is he currently beyond the Balkans? Not getting an answer to this and many other questions with which I turned to various dignitaries of the dead, I began to be embarrassed, despaired, and even thought about quitting spiritualism; when a sudden knocking under the table at which I was sitting made me shudder, and then completely bewildered, when above my ears someone's voice very clearly and distinctly said: "Don't complain!" The first impression of fear was soon replaced by complete pleasure, for it was revealed to me that the spirit that was talking to me belonged to the poet, deep thinker and statesman, the late real state councilor Kozma Petrovich Prutkov. From that moment on, my favorite pastime became to write under the dictation of this venerable writer. But since, by the will of the famous deceased, I have no right to keep secret what I hear from him, I suggest you, sir, through your respected newspaper, acquaint the public with everything that I have already heard and that I will have a chance to hear from the deceased in the future. K. P. Prutkova. Accept the assurance of perfect respect from your obedient servant. N. N. Retired Major General and Chevalier. I Hello reader! After a long period of time, I am talking to you again. Of course you are glad to see me. I praise. But, of course, you are not a little surprised, because you remember that in 1865 (annus, i) in one of the books of Sovremennik (now abolished) the news of my death was placed. Yes, I really died; I will say more, the uniform in which I was buried has already decayed; but nevertheless I am talking to you again. Thank my friend N.N. for this. Have you already guessed that N.N. is a medium? Fine. It is through him that I can speak to you. I have long wanted to tell you about the possibility for the living to communicate with the dead, but I could not do this earlier, because there was no suitable medium. It was impossible for me, who died with the rank of a real state councilor, to appear on the call of mediums who do not have a rank, for example, Hume, Bredif and comp<ании>. What would my former subordinates, the officials of the Assay Chamber, think if my spirit, called by one of the aforementioned strangers, began to play the harmonica under the table or grab those present by the knees? No, I remained the same proud nobleman and official behind the coffin! From what I have said, I think you have already guessed that the medium I have chosen is a quite respectable person, and if I hide him under the letters N.N. the experience of a wise general, from the scoffing of modern liberals. Entering into a conversation with you again, through my medium, I consider it necessary to tell you the following: you read, and probably more than once, an obituary about me, and therefore you remember that I was married to the girl Proklevetantova. One of her relatives, the provincial secretary Iliodor Proklevetantov, served under my command in the Assay Chamber. I have always been a strict but fair boss, and in particular I did not like to indulge freethinkers. This happened with Proklevetantov, whom, despite his kinship, I fired on the 3rd point and, of course, made an enemy in him. This famous relative not only caused me trouble in life, but when he died, he does not leave me alone. So, until recently, for example, he boasted among some dignitaries of the dead that he would shame me by telling through some medium that I appeared at Hume's sessions and played the harmonica under the table! my reputation; but let it be better, having become more familiar with the matter, you decide for yourself, reader: does my act deserve reproach? Yes, once, really on Hume's call, I, in one of his sessions, not only played the harmonica under the table, but also threw a bell and even grabbed other people's knees. But, firstly, it was in Paris, in Napoleon's palace, where none of my former subordinate officials of the Assay Chamber were there, and secondly, I did it, wanting to take revenge on Napoleon for my son Parfyon, who was killed near Sevastopol! After this session, having entered into direct relations with Napoleon himself, I inspired him with the idea of ​​starting a war with Prussia! I directed it in the Sedan! Did I humiliate the rank I held? Not at all. Now, knowing the matter as it was, it depends on the degree of your good intentions to believe the gossip of Proklevetantov. But enough about that. There are many more interesting things that I want to talk to you about. Do you remember that I did not like idleness? Even now I do not sit idly by and constantly think about the good and prosperity of our fatherland. In the former co-editor of Moskovskie Vedomosti, Leontiev, who recently moved here, I found great consolation for myself. We often talk to each other, and there has not yet been a case that our views differed in anything. And this is not surprising: we are both classics. True, my love for classicism has always been expressed almost exclusively by the word annus, i, which appears on my works; but is that not enough? Indeed, at that time, classicism was not held in such high esteem as it is now ... Medium's note. (The well-known strictly conservative direction of the unforgettable K. P. Prutkov, his unparalleled morality and the purity of even his innermost thoughts, of course, cannot be suspected; but nevertheless, for my personal reasons, I had to release something from the proposed story (seeing that the long-term sojourn of the deceased as a spirit had accustomed him to a certain free-thinking, against which he himself so fervently opposed during his lifetime. May the readers forgive me if, as a result of the omissions I made, the continuation of this conversation turned out to be somewhat unclear.) - In defense of the above, there is a subtle, indirect hint in my well-known aphorisms: “What will others say about you if you cannot say anything about yourself?” or: "Encouragement is as necessary for an artist as rosin is necessary for a virtuoso's bow." But, guided by these two wise pieces of advice, based on the practice of life, remember the third, very clever, albeit short, saying - “be careful”. This, apparently, a very short word has a very deep meaning. Consciously or instinctively, but every creature understands the meaning of this, perhaps too short, word. The swift-flying swallow and the voluptuous sparrow take refuge under the roof of the building of truth. The burbot, calmly playing in the river, instantly hides in a hole, noticing the approach of the deacon, who has become accustomed to catching this fish with his hands. The biwomb takes her cubs and rushes to the top of the tree, hearing the crackling of branches under the feet of a bloodthirsty leopard. A sailor whose cap with ribbons was blown into the sea during a strong storm does not rush into the waves to save this government item, because he has already noticed a predatory shark that has gaped its nasty horn with sharp teeth to swallow the sailor himself and other government items. located on it. But nature, which protects everyone from the danger that threatens him, not without intent, as one must assume, allowed the beast and man to forget this short word: "watch out." It is known that if this word had never been forgotten by anyone, then soon enough free space would not have been found on the entire globe. II It is difficult for me, dear friend N.N., to answer all the questions you propose. You're asking too much of me. Be content with my messages about the afterlife, which I have the right to convey to you, and do not try to penetrate into the depths that should remain a mystery to the living. Take a pencil, and against every question you ask, write down what I say. Question. What impression does the deceased experience in the first days of his appearance in the next world? Answer. Very strange, though different for everyone. It is directly dependent on our way of life on earth and the habits we have adopted. I'll tell you personally about myself. When, after long painful sufferings, my spirit was freed from the body, I felt an unusual lightness and at first I could not give myself a clear account of what was happening to me. On the way of my flight into boundless space, I happened to meet some commanders who had died before me, and my first thought was to fasten my uniform and straighten the badge around my neck. Feeling and not finding either the order or the coat of arms buttons, I involuntarily became dumbfounded. My embarrassment increased even more when, looking around, I noticed that I had no clothes on at all. At the same moment, a picture I had seen a long time ago, depicting Adam and Eve after the fall, revived in my memory; both of them, ashamed of their nakedness, hide behind a tree. I became terrified at the realization that I had sinned a lot in my life and that my uniform, orders and even the rank of a real state councilor would no longer cover my sinfulness! I began to look around me anxiously, trying to find at least a small cloud behind which I could take cover; but found nothing! My gaze, wandering drearily, stopped on the ground, where it was not without difficulty that I found the swampy area of ​​St. Petersburg, and on one of its streets I noticed a funeral procession. It was my own funeral! Carefully peering at those who accompanied the sad chariot that carried my mortal remains, I was unpleasantly struck by the indifferent expression on the faces of many of my subordinates. In particular, I was deeply upset by the inappropriate gaiety of my secretary Lusilin, who was fussing around the state councilor Wenzelhosen, who had been appointed to my place. Such apparent ingratitude in those whom I exalted and rewarded more than others, brought tears to my eyes. I already felt how they, rolling down both cheeks, united into one large drop on the tip of my nose, and I wanted to wipe myself with a handkerchief, but stopped. I realized that this is a delusion of the senses. I am a spirit, therefore, I could not have tears, not a drop on my nose, not even a nose itself. Such a deception of the senses was repeated with me more than once, until I finally got used to my new position. Under the mass of new impressions, on the first day I did not notice that I did not eat anything, was not in the presence and was not engaged in literature; but on the second and subsequent days, the inability to satisfy all these habits puzzled me greatly. I felt the greatest embarrassment when I remembered that tomorrow was the name day of my boss and benefactor and that I would no longer come to him with the usual congratulations. Then the idea occurred to me to inform my widow of the need to serve on that day (as happened in my presence) a prayer service for the health of my boss and his family and continue to spend on these prayer services until she receives official notification of the assignment of a lump-sum allowance to her and pensions for my service. The matter was settled, however, of itself; my widow, like an intelligent woman, did everything herself, without outside guidance. Question: Which is more correct to say: acorn coffee or stomach coffee? Answer. I don't answer stupid questions like that. Question. Did Napoleon III have a presentiment that he would soon die? Answer. Everyone can answer only for himself, and therefore ask him if you are so interested in this. In addition, you yourself can realize that, being his leader in the last war, it is embarrassing for me to meet with him, and even more so to enter into conversations. Questions: 1) What form or, better to say, what appearance does the soul of the deceased receive? 2) What is the pastime of the dead? 3) Can the dead reveal to us, the living, what awaits us in life? 4) Is Ovsyannikov guilty of setting fire to the Kokorevka mill? 5) Is Abbess Mitrofania really guilty? All these five questions remained unanswered. III Anyone who thinks that a spirit that has appeared at the call of a medium can answer all questions put to it forgets that the spirit is also subject to certain laws, which it has no right to violate. Those who believe that the hands of some dead Chinese and Indian girls, shown by various mediums, really belong to these girls, and not to charlatans-mediums, are also unfounded. Can a spirit have any members of a human body? Recall my story about how, wanting to wipe away the tears and the drop on my nose, I did not find any tears, or a drop, or even a nose. If we assume that the spirit can have hands, then why not assume that the wind moves through the legs? Both are equally ridiculous. Just as people are divided into good and bad, so spirits are also good and bad. Therefore, be careful in your dealings with spirits and avoid those who are not well-intentioned among them. Among the latter belongs, by the way, Iliodor Proklevetantov, about whom I have already mentioned above. Not every spirit comes to the call of a medium. Only those of us who were too attached to everything earthly appear and answer, and therefore, beyond the grave, do not cease to be interested in everything that is done with you. I belong to this category, with my unsatisfied ambition and thirst for glory. Being richly gifted by nature with literary talent, I still wanted to acquire the glory of a statesman. Therefore, I spent a lot of time on drawing up projects, which, however, despite their serious state significance, had to remain in my portfolio without further movement, partly because someone always had time to present their project before me, partly because many they were not finished (d "inacheve). The obscurity of these incomplete projects of mine, as well as of many literary works, still haunts me. How long I will suffer in this way, I do not know; but I think that my spirit will not rest until it conveys everything that I have acquired through sleepless nights, many years of experience and practice of life. Maybe I can do it, maybe I won't. How often a person, in the arrogant consciousness of his mind and superiority over other creatures, when plotting something, already decides in advance that the results of his assumptions will be exactly those, and not others. But do his expectations always come true? Not at all. Often the most unexpected and even completely opposite results are obtained. Why would it seem more natural to meet a horse with at least an attempt at resistance when you make trouble for her nose, but who will dispute the validity of my well-known aphorism: “Click a mare in the nose, she will wave her tail”? Therefore, I cannot foresee now whether I will cease to be interested in what is going on with you, on earth, when my name will thunder even among the wild tribes of Africa and America, especially the Iroquois, whom I have always loved from afar and platonically for their sonorous nickname . IV In the first conversations published by my medium in No. 84 of St. Petersburg. statements”, errors crept in. I'm sorry, but I'm not upset, because I remember that everyone makes mistakes. I am not upset that my medium has completely excluded some passages from my reasoning. But I do not hide from you, reader, that I am angry with the stupid reservation he made, as if those passages were released to him because of what he saw in them. free-thinking! Slander! Free-thinking in the judgments of a man whose good intentions were constantly envied even by the late B. M. Fedorov himself! Evidently, my medium's delusion comes from excessive caution. And excess, as you know, is prudent to allow only in one case - when praising the authorities. In the portfolio left after me with the inscription: “Collection of the unfinished (d” inacheve) ”there is, among other things, a small sketch entitled:“ About what direction should be given to a well-intentioned subordinate, so that his desire to criticize the actions of his superiors would be in favor this last one." The main idea of ​​this sketch is that the younger is inclined to discuss the actions of the elder and that the results of such a discussion may not always be favorable for the latter. It is as absurd to suppose that any measures are capable of destroying in a person his tendency to criticize, as to try to embrace the immensity. Therefore, one thing remains: The right to discuss the actions of a senior is limited by giving the subordinate the opportunity to express his feelings with thanksgiving addresses, presenting the titles of an honorary magistrate or honorary citizen, arranging dinners, meetings, seeing off and similar honors. This results in a double convenience: firstly, the boss, knowing about such a right of subordinates, encourages their voluntarily expressed feelings and at the same time can judge the degree of good intentions of each. On the other hand, the vanity of the younger ones is also flattered, realizing their right to analyze the actions of the elder. In addition, the composition of addresses, sharpening the imagination of subordinates, contributes a lot to the improvement of their style. I shared these thoughts with one of the governors and subsequently received gratitude from him, so that, applying them in his administration, he soon became an honorary citizen of the nine cities subject to him, and the style of his officials became exemplary. Judge for yourself by the following address given to the chief on the occasion of the new year: “Your excellency, father, shining in heavenly virtue! In the new year, everyone and everyone has new hopes and expectations, new ideas, enterprises, everything is new. Surely there must be new thoughts and feelings? The New Year is not a new world, a new time; the former was not reborn, the latter is irrevocable. Consequently: the new year is only the continuation of the existence of the same world, a new category of life, a new era of memories of all the most important events! When is it more fitting, if not now, to renew for us the sweet memory of our benefactor, who has settled for eternity in our hearts? So, we welcome you, excellent dignitary and honorary citizen, in this new chronology, with our new unanimous desire to be as happy in the full meaning of this myth as it is possible for a person to enjoy on earth in his own sphere; be loved by all those dear to your heart as much as we love, respect and honor you! Your well-being is the grace of God for us, your peace of mind is our joy, your memory of us is the highest earthly reward! Live, valiant husband, the age of Methuselah for the good of posterity. Take heart with new forces of a patriot for the good of the people. And it remains for us to pray to the Knower of Hearts for sending you a hundredfold of all these blessings with your entire family church for many years! These sincere shades of feelings are dedicated to Your Excellency by grateful subordinates. Unfortunately, as far as I know, none of the dignitaries has yet taken full advantage of the advice I have outlined in the above sketch. And meanwhile, the strict application of these tips in practice would greatly contribute to the improvement of the morality of subordinates. Consequently, the possibility of a repetition of sad incidents, such as the one I describe below, which happened in a family close to me, would be eliminated.

Glafira stumbled

On the father's dressing-case,

She turned around in fear.

In front of her is an officer

Glafira sees the lancer,

Ulan Glafira sees,

Suddenly - they hear - from the closet

Grandfather Shadow says:

"Militant offspring,

The bravest of people

Be brave, don't be shy

With my Glafira.

Glafira! from the closet

I command:

Love this lancer

Take him as your husband."

Grabbing Glafira's hands,

The uhlan asked her:

“Whose stuff is this, Glasha?

Who is occupied by this closet?

Glafira from fright

Turns pale and trembles

And huddle closer to the Friend,

And a friend says:

"I don't remember, I guess.

How many years have passed

Our grief is unparalleled

Befell - the grandfather died.

During his life he is in a closet

spent all the time

And only for the bath

He came out from there."

Listens with embarrassment

Glafira officer

And invites with a sign

Go to the Belvedere.

“Where, Glafira, are you climbing?” -

The invisible grandfather is screaming.

"Where? Say, are you crazy? -

Glafira says -

After all, he himself ordered from the coffin,

Should we get married?"

“Yes, why are both

Strive for the attic?

Go to church before

Let the rite be completed

And, in festive clothes

Turning back

Be everywhere, if you like,

You two can."

Ulan said rudely:

"No, we won't go to church,

Infidel custom

Everywhere now introduced

Between us civil marriage

It might be locked up."

Instantly and swiftly

The whole closet opened

And an impressive push in the chest

I felt the uhlan.

Almost fell off

Steep stairs

And what is the strength set off

Rush to run home.

Glafira sits at night,

Glafira sits for days,

Sobs that there is urine,

But in the belvedere no-no!

Note. For some time now, someone has been publishing his writings in the Petersburg Newspaper under the name K. Prutkov, Jr. I remind you, reader, that there were three of all the Prutkovs who worked in the literary field: my grandfather, father and I. Unfortunately, none of my numerous descendants inherited literary talent. Therefore, I, for real, should be called "junior". And therefore, in order to avoid misunderstandings, I declare that I have nothing in common with the author of the articles published in the Peterburgskaya Gazeta; he is not only not a relative of me, but not even a namesake. K. P. Prutkov. With genuine true: medium N. N. Some materials for the biography of K. P. Prutkov Taken from a briefcase with the inscription: "Collection of unfinished (d "inacheve)" All respectable and well-intentioned subjects know that my famous uncle Kozma Petrovich Prutkov (his name is spelled “Kozma”, as “Kozma Minin”) has long, unfortunately, died, but, as a true son of the fatherland, although he did not participate in the editorial magazine and newspaper of this name, even after his death he did not stop lovingly following all the events in our dear fatherland and, as you know, reader, he recently began to share his remarks, information and assumptions with some high-ranking persons. Among such persons, he especially loves his medium, Pavel Petrovich N.N. But, with all due respect to this visionary, I consider it necessary, in the form of sacred justice, to warn you, well-intentioned reader, that although he is called by his patronymic with my late uncle - “Petrovich”, but neither he nor I are at all related, not an uncle and not even a namesake. All these serious reasons, however, do not in the least hinder the mutual friendly goodwill that existed and exists between the late Kozma Petrovich and the still living Pavel Petrovich. There are many similarities between the two (if one can put it this way for brevity) "Petroviches" and just as many differences. The intelligent reader will understand that this is not about appearance. This latter (I use this word, of course, not in a bad sense) was so unusual with the late Kozma Petrovich that it was impossible not to notice it even among a large society. Here is what, by the way, in a short obituary about the ever-memorable deceased (Sovremennik, 1865) I said: “The appearance of the deceased was majestic, but strict; a high forehead, tilted back, feathered below with thick reddish eyebrows, and above, overshadowed by poetically tousled, chantret hair with graying hair; yellow-chestnut complexion and hands; a serpentine sarcastic smile, which always showed a whole row, though blackened and thinned from tobacco and time, but still large and strong teeth, finally, a head forever thrown back ... " The appearance of Pavel Petrovich is completely opposite to this. He is less than average in height, with a little red nose turned up like a carnelian cufflink; there is almost no hair on the head and face, but the mouth is filled with teeth made by Wagenheim or Wallenstein. Kozma and Pavel Petrovich, as already mentioned above, although they were never relatives among themselves, both were born on April 11, 1801 near Solvychegodsk, in the village. Tenteleva; moreover, it turned out that the mother of Pavel Petrovich, who shortly before this was the German girl Stockfish, at that time was already legally married to the retired lieutenant Pyotr Nikiforovich N. N., a friend of the father of the famous K. P. Prutkov. The parent of the unforgettable Kozma Petrovich at that time was considered a wealthy man among his neighbors. On the contrary, Pavel Petrovich's parent had almost nothing; and therefore it is not surprising that, after the death of his wife, he gladly accepted the offer of his friend to move to his house. Thus, “from childhood,” as the venerable Pavel Petrovich puts it, fate connected him with the future famous writer, the only son of his most worthy parents, K.P. Prutkov! But let my famous uncle tell about himself further. In the papers of the deceased, stored in a briefcase with the inscription: “Collection of the unfinished (d” inacheve)”, in a special notebook entitled “Materials for my biography”, it is written: “In 1801, on April 11, at 11 pm, in a spacious wooden house with a mezzanine, the owner of the village. Tenteleva, near Solvychegodsk, the cry of a healthy newborn male baby was heard for the first time; this cry belonged to me, and the house belonged to my dear parents. About three hours later, a similar cry was heard at the other end of the same landowner's house, in the room, the so-called "bosquet room"; this second cry, although it also belonged to a male baby, but not to me, but to the son of the former German girl Stockfish, who had recently married Pyotr Nikiforovich, who was temporarily staying at my parents' house. The christening of both newborns took place on the same day, in the same font, and the same persons were our godparents, namely: the Solvychegoda farmer Sysa Terentyevich Seliverstov and the wife of the postmaster Kapitolina Dmitrievna Grai-Zherebets. Exactly five years later, on my birthday, when we gathered for breakfast, a bell was heard, and a carriage appeared in the yard, in which, by a gray camlot overcoat, everyone recognized Pyotr Nikiforovich. It was really he who came with his son Pavlusha. Their arrival to us had long been expected, and on this occasion, almost several times a day, I heard from all the household that Pavlusha would soon arrive, whom I must love because we were born almost at the same time, baptized in one font and that both of us have the same godfather and mother. All this preparation was of little use; at first we were both shy and only scowled at each other. From that day on, Pavlusha stayed with us, and until the age of 20 I was not separated from him. When both of us were ten years old, we were put to the ABC. Our first teacher was the kindest Father John Proleptov, our parish priest. He later taught us other subjects as well. Now, in my declining life, I often like to remember the time of my childhood and lovingly look through the notebook of the venerable presbyter, which accidentally survived, along with my study books, with his own notes on our successes. Here is one of the pages of this book: God's law: Kozma - successfully; Pavel - carefully Explanation of the liturgy: Kozma - from the heart; Pavel - humbly-wise Arithmetic: Kozma - strong, lively good; Pavel - fast-correct Calligraphy: Kozma - satisfactory; Pavel - round-pleasant Exercise on the accounts: Kozma - boldly-distinctly; Pavel - smart Sacred history: Kozma - reasonably understandable; Pavel - entertaining Russian literature: Kozma - instructive and laudatory; Pavel - diligently respectable During the week, both pets behaved very well. Kozma, being more nimble, always wants to excel. Friendly, God-fearing and respectful to elders. Such marks brought my parents to indescribable joy and strengthened their conviction that something extraordinary would come out of me. Their premonition did not deceive them. The literary forces that unfolded early in me incited me to study and delivered me from the pernicious infatuations of youth. I was barely seventeen years old when the briefcase in which I hid my youthful works was overflowing. There was prose and poetry. Someday I will acquaint you, reader, with these works, and now read the fable I wrote at that time. Once I noticed Father John dozing on a bench in the garden, I wrote the proposed fable for this occasion:

One day, with a staff and a book in hand,

Father Ivan trudged deliberately to the river,

Why to the river? then to packs

Look at how crayfish crawl in it.

Ivan's father has such a temper.

Here, talking to myself,

Reisfeder he is in the book of that

He drew various, although not very marks,

Notes. Tired, sitting on the river bank,

Fell asleep and out of hand

Book first, gumilastic,

And there is a staff - everything is at the bottom.

When suddenly a tadpole pops up,

And, greedily grasping in an instant one

Like a staff, so equally

And gumilastic

Well, in a word, everything that the shepherd missed,

He addressed this speech to him:

“Jerei! not to wear cassocks,

If you want, father, you sit in idleness

Or in idle talk to sharpen balusters!

You must watch day and night

To instruct those, to please about those,

Who does not know the dogmas of faith,

And don't sit

And don't stare

And don't snore

Like a sexton, not knowing the measure.

Yes, this fable goes to Moscow, Ryazan and St. Petersburg,

She repeats more often by heart

God-fearing presbyter.

I vividly remember the sad consequences of this youthful prank. The name day of my parent was approaching, and now it occurred to Father John to force me and Pavlusha to learn verses for this day to congratulate the dear birthday man. The verses he chose, although they were very incoherent, were pompous. Both of us memorized these verses notably and on a solemn day they recited them without hesitation in front of the hero of the holiday. The parent was delighted, he kissed us, kissed Father John. During the day, we were repeatedly forced to either show these verses written on a large sheet of stationery paper, or recite them to this or that guest. We sat at the table. Everything was jubilant, noisy, talking, and it seemed that there was nowhere to expect trouble. It was necessary, to my misfortune, that it happened that at dinner I had to sit down next to our neighbor Anisim Fedotych Puzyrenko, who took it into his head to tease me that I myself could not compose anything and that the rumors that had reached him about my ability to compose were unfair; I got excited and answered him rather obstinately, and when he demanded proof, I did not hesitate to give him the piece of paper that was in my pocket, on which my fable "The Priest and the Humilastic" was written. The paper went from hand to hand. Who, having read, praised, and who, having looked, silently passed it on to another. Father John, having read and made an inscription on the side with a pencil: “Courageously, but boldly,” he passed it on to his neighbor. Finally, the paper ended up in the hands of my parent. Seeing the inscription of the presbyter, he frowned and, without hesitation, said loudly: “Kozma! come to me". I obeyed, sensing, however, something unkind. And so it happened - from the chair on which my parent was sitting, in tears, I hurriedly went to the mezzanine, to my room, with the back of my head fairly bruised ... This incident had an impact on the further fate of me and my comrade. It was recognized that both of us were too spoiled, and therefore it was enough to stuff us with sciences, but it would be better to assign both of us to the service and introduce them to military discipline. Thus, we entered the junkers, I in the *** army hussar regiment, and Pavlusha in one of the infantry army regiments. From that moment on, we took a different path. Having married in the twenty-fifth year of my life, I was retired for some time and took care of the household in the estate I inherited from my parent near Solvychegodsk. Subsequently, he entered the service again, but already in a civilian department. At the same time, never leaving literary studies, I have the consolation to enjoy the justly deserved fame of a poet and statesman. On the contrary, my childhood friend, Pavel Petrovich, modestly continued his service up to the highest ranks in the same regiment and showed no inclination towards literature. However, no: his next literary work gained fame in the regiment. Concerned that the provisions determined for the soldiers would reach them in full, Pavel Petrovich issued an order in which he recommended Messrs. officers to have supervision over the correct digestion of soldiers. With the entry into the civil service, I moved to St. Petersburg, which I will hardly ever agree to leave, because only here can an employee make a career for himself, if there is no special patronage. I never counted on protection. My mind and undoubted talents, backed up by boundless good intentions, constituted my patronage. In particular, this last quality was greatly appreciated by one influential person, who had long accepted me under his patronage and greatly contributed to the vacancy of the head of the Assay Office that was then opening up for me, and not for anyone else. Having received this position, I came to thank my patron, and these are the unforgettable words that were expressed by him in response to my expression of gratitude: “Serve as you have served until now, and you will go far. Faddey Bulgarin and Boris Fedorov are also well-intentioned people, but they don’t have your administrative abilities, and their appearance is unrepresentative, and you should be made a governor for your figure alone. Such an opinion about my service abilities made me work harder on this part. Various projects, assumptions, thoughts, tending exclusively to the benefit of the fatherland, soon filled my portfolio. Thus, under the experienced guidance of an influential person, my administrative abilities improved, and a number of various projects and assumptions presented by me at his discretion settled both in him and in many others, an opinion about my remarkable talents as a statesman. I will not hide that such flattering reviews about me turned my head so much that they even, to a certain extent, had an influence on the negligence of the finish of the projects I presented. That is the reason why this branch of my labors bears the stamp of the unfinished (d "inacheve). Some projects were especially brevity, and even more than is usually customary, so as not to tire the attention of the elder. Perhaps this was precisely the circumstance that was the reason why my projects were not given due attention.But that is not my fault.I gave an idea, and it was the duty of minor figures to develop and process it. I did not confine myself to some projects on the reduction of correspondence, but constantly touched on the various needs and requirements of our state. At the same time, I noticed that those projects came out with me more fully and better, with which I myself sympathized with all my heart. For example, I will point out those two that at one time attracted the most attention: 1) “about the need to establish one common opinion in the state” and 2) “about what direction should be given to a well-intentioned subordinate in order to criticize the actions of his authorities were in favor of this latter. Both of these projects, as far as I know, were not officially and completely adopted, but, having met with great sympathy from many bosses, in particular, they were repeatedly applied in practice, not without success. For a long time I did not believe in the possibility of carrying out a peasant reform. Sharing on this subject the just views of Mr. Blanc and others, I, of course, did not sympathize with the reform, but nevertheless, when I was convinced of its inevitability, I appeared with my project, although I was aware of the inapplicability and impracticality of the measures I proposed. Most of the time, however, I always devoted to literature. Neither the service in the Assay Office, nor the drafting of projects that opened up a wide path for me to honors and promotions, nothing lessened my passion for poetry. I wrote a lot, but I didn't print anything. I was content with the fact that my handwritten works were read with delight by numerous admirers of my talent, and in particular I valued the reviews of my works by my friends: gr. A. K. Tolstoy and his cousins ​​Alexei, Alexander and Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov. Under their direct influence and guidance, my enormous literary talent developed, matured, strengthened and improved, which glorified the name of Prutkov and amazed the world with its extraordinary diversity. Yielding only to their insistence, I decided to publish my writings in Sovremennik. Gratitude and strict justice are always characteristic of the character of a great and noble person, and therefore I will boldly say that these feelings inspired me with the idea to oblige the above-named persons by my spiritual testament to publish a complete collection of my works, at their own expense, and thereby forever connect their little-known names with a loud and famous name of K. Prutkov”. With this information ends my late uncle's manuscript, entitled "Materials for my biography." The remaining pages of the notebook are dotted with various kinds of poems and notes. The latter are especially remarkable for their diversity. It is very unfortunate that the pages of this notebook are written too illegibly, in places crossed out, and in places even filled with ink, so that very little can be made out. One page, for example, is so soiled that one can hardly read the following: “Instruction on how to prepare a glorious chamber junker, Schaffhausen patch.” On the next page are separate notes that have no connection with each other, namely; About excellence What is superior? Manir, or a way to express the highest degree of quality, in strength, kindness, concept, goodness and beauty, or size, in longitude, height, breadth, thickness, depth, and so on. How many superlatives? Two. Superlative imperious and superlative relative or similar. - Why is the gray always jealous of the buckskin? - They say that the spleen is cut out of the walkers so that their legs get more agility. This rumor requires careful verification. - It is known that Cardinal de Richelieu every morning, on the advice of his physician, drank a glass of radish juice. - A genius thinks and creates. An ordinary person carries out. The fool uses and does not thank. - A certain chief, examining one educational institution, went, by the way, into the infirmary. Seeing the patient there, he asked him: “What is your last name?” He also heard that he was being asked what he was ill with, and therefore he answered with bashfulness: “Diarrhea, Your Excellency.” - “Ah! Greek surname,” said the chief. - Buy only the soap that says: la loi punit le contrefa-cteur (Forgery is punishable by law (French)). Extracts from my diary in the village I July 28th, 1861. Khvoskurovo village. Very hot, even in the shade, there must be many degrees. I'm lying on a mountain under a birch, II (Two days later. Mercury is rising higher and seems to will soon reach the place where St. Petersburg is written.) Leaves turn yellow on trees. - The one who, instead of a ruble, a ship, a crane, says a rupe, a carapace, a crane, he will probably say kolidor, faletor, kufnya, haldareya. - Why is a foreigner less eager to live with us than we are in his land? Because he is already abroad. -Before you decide on any commercial business, ask: is a Jew or a German engaged in such a business? If so, then act boldly, which means there will be profits. An excerpt from the poem "Medic"

The cunning doctor is looking for medicine,

To help the watchman's aunt, -

There is no cure; he whistles into his fist,

And it's already night outside.

There is not a single bottle in the closet,

All there by tomorrow

One envelope with dry raspberries

And very little rhubarb.

Meanwhile, in a fever, the aunt is delirious,

Hot aunty is sick...

The crafty doctor still does not go,

She has been waiting for medicine for a long time!

The old woman's body burns with fire,

Nature's strange game!

Everywhere is dry, but sweaty

Only one left calf...

Here comes from the front

The call is hasty: ding-ding-ding.

“You should come the other day!”

"And what?" - “Amen to aunt!”

"There is no way to help the old woman, -

So the evil doctor says, -

Does she have an inheritance?

Who will pay me for the visit?

The spiritualist is holding a speech for me, under the coffin roof.

"Sage and patriot! Your turn has come;

Guide and help! Prutkov! Do you hear?

With a pen, I zealously served my native land,

When he lived in the world ... And it seems like a long time ago eh ?!

And now, dead man, I again play in her destinies -

I was a servant of the authorities; but not afraid of fear,

Of those who do not bend flexible backs,

And proudly I wore a star and deserved -

I, an old monarchist, resent the new ones:

They will compromise - I'm very afraid -

And the supreme power, and with it the holy -

Solemn vow gave birth to hope in the country

And was greeted with approval by the whole world ...

And its execution is not visible between

Already the Black Hundreds are preparing a deal for this:

When a host of guests gather at the invited feast -

Place them decorously and give them a plate -

And the role of the government, to me, is not safe;

There is something d "inacheve ... No! We must save power,

So that she does not agree with the act -

I, a loyal subject, think about it this way:

Since the power itself has given hope -

Let the request: “Give!” - ends with the answer:

I said the main thing; but out of love for the motherland

Willingly I will teach those thoughts,

Which I carefully followed during my lifetime -

Ruler! let not your days pass idle;

At least throw pebbles, if there is leisure for that;

But watch: in the water they breed -

Ruler! avoid walking on the slope:

Sliding, or you fall, or you trample your boots;

And do not go on the road, if not at night -

Letting the play of the service fountain rest,

Follow the opinion of the country more closely;

And in order not to become a victim of self-deception, -

Let me remind you the truth that will help

My compatriots do not get into a mistake;

That the immensity itself cannot embrace -

My teaching, it seems to me, is

What could help others in the midst of struggle and turmoil.

For all the same true refuge of peace -

Kozma Petrovich Prutkov spent his entire life, except for the years of childhood and early adolescence, in the public service: first in the military department, and then in the civil service. He was born April 11, 1803; died January 13, 1863

In the Obituary and in other articles about him, attention was drawn to the following two facts: first, that he marked all his printed prose articles on the 11th of April or any other month; and secondly, that he wrote his own name: Kozma, not Kuzma. Both of these facts are true; but the first of them was misunderstood. It was believed that, marking his works with the 11th number, he wanted to commemorate his birthday each time; in fact, he did not commemorate his birthday with such a mark, but his wonderful dream, probably only coincidentally coincided with his birthday and had an impact on his whole life. The content of this dream is described below, according to Kozma Prutkov himself. As for the way he wrote his name, in reality he was not even written "Kozma", but Cosmas, like his famous namesakes: Cosmas and Damian, Cosmas Minin, Cosmas Medici and a few others like him.

In 1820, he entered the military service, only for the uniform, and stayed in this service for just over two years, in the hussars. It was at this time that he had the aforementioned dream. Namely: on the night of April 10-11, 1823, returning home late from a comrade's drinking bout and barely lying down on his bed, he saw in front of him a naked brigadier general, in epaulettes, who, having lifted him from the bed by the hand and not allowing him to get dressed, silently led him along some long and dark corridors to the top of a high and pointed mountain, and there he began to take out various precious materials in front of him from the ancient crypt, showing them to him one after another and even putting some of them to his chilled body. Prutkov expected with bewilderment and fear the denouement of this incomprehensible event; but suddenly, from the touch of the most expensive of these matters, he felt a strong electric shock throughout his body, from which he woke up covered in perspiration. It is not known what significance Kozma Petrovich Prutkov attached to this vision. But, often talking about him later, op always got into great excitement and ended his story with a loud exclamation: “On the same morning, barely waking up, I decided to leave the regiment and resigned; and when the resignation came out, I immediately decided to serve in the Ministry of Finance, in the Assay Office, where I will stay forever!

Indeed, having entered the Assay Chamber in 1823, he remained there until his death, that is, until January 13, 1863. The authorities distinguished and rewarded him. Here, in this Tabernacle, he was honored to receive all civil ranks, up to and including the actual state councilor, and the highest position: director of the Assay Tabernacle; and then the Order of St. Stanislav of the 1st degree, who always seduced him, as can be seen from the fable "The Star and the Belly."

In general, he was very pleased with his service.

Only during the period of preparing the reforms of the last reign, he seemed to be at a loss. At first it seemed to him that the soil was leaving from under him, and he began to grumble, shouting everywhere about the prematureness of any reforms and that he was “the enemy of all so-called questions!”. However, later, when the inevitability of reforms became undeniable, he himself tried to distinguish himself by reforming projects and was very indignant when these projects rejected him for their obvious failure. He explained this by envy, disrespect for experience and merit, and began to fall into despondency, even despair. In one of the moments of such gloomy despair, he wrote a mystery: "The Affinity of the World Forces", which is published for the first time in this edition and quite correctly conveys the then painful state of his spirit. 1
In the same state of mind, he wrote the poem "Before the Sea of ​​Life", also published for the first time in this edition.

Soon, however, he calmed down, felt the old atmosphere around him, and under him the old soil. He again began to write projects, but in a shy direction, and they were accepted with approval. This gave him reason to return to his former complacency and expect a significant promotion. A sudden nervous shock that befell him in the director's office of the Assay Tent, at the very departure of the service, put an end to these hopes, ending his glorious days. This edition contains for the first time his "Death" poem, recently found in the secret file of the Assay Chamber.

But no matter how great his service successes and virtues, they alone would not have brought him even a hundredth of the glory that he acquired through his literary activity. Meanwhile, he had been in the public service (including the hussars) for more than forty years, and in the literary field he acted publicly for only five years (in 1853-54 and in the 1860s).

Until 1850, precisely before his accidental acquaintance with a small circle of young people, consisting of several Zhemchuzhnikov brothers and their cousin, Count Alexei Konstantinovich Tolstoy, Kozma Petrovich Prutkov never thought about literary or any other public activities. He understood himself only as an assiduous official of the Assay Chamber and did not dream of anything further in official success. In 1850, Count A. K. Tolstoy and Alexei Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov, not foreseeing serious consequences from their undertaking, took it into their heads to assure him that they saw in him remarkable talents for dramatic creativity. He, believing them, wrote under their leadership the comedy "Fantasy", which was performed on the stage of the St. Petersburg Alexandria Theater, in the highest presence, on January 8, 1851, for the benefit of the then favorite of the public, Mr. Maksimov 1st. On the same evening, however, she was withdrawn from the theatrical repertoire, by special order; this can only be explained by the originality of the plot and the bad acting of the actors.

It is being printed for the first time only now.

This first failure did not cool the novice writer either to his new friends or to the literary field. He obviously began to believe in his literary talents. Moreover, the aforementioned Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov and his brother Alexander encouraged him, persuading him to engage in composing fables. He immediately became jealous of the glory of I. A. Krylov, especially since I. A. Krylov was also in the public service and was also a knight of the Order of St.. Stanislav 1st degree. In this mood he wrote three fables! "Forget-me-nots and commas", "The conductor and the tarantula" and "The heron and the racing droshky"; they were published in the magazine. "Contemporary" (1851, book XI, in "Notes of the New Poet") and the public liked it very much. The well-known writer Druzhinin published a very sympathetic article about them, it seems, in the journal Library for Reading.

Taking these first steps in literature, Kozma Petrovich Prutkov, however, did not think of indulging in it. He only obeyed the persuasion of his new acquaintances. He was pleased to be convinced of his new talents, but he was afraid and did not want to be known as a writer; therefore he concealed his name from the public.

His first work, the comedy "Fantasy", he gave out on the poster for writing some kind of "Y and Z"; and his first three fables, named above, he gave to the press without any name. This was the case until 1852; but this year a radical revolution took place in his personality under the influence of three persons from the aforementioned circle: Count A. K. Tolstoy, Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov and Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov. These three persons took possession of him, took him under their wing and developed in him those typical qualities that made him known as Kozma Prutkov. He became self-confident, self-satisfied, harsh; he began to address the public "as one in authority"; and in this new and final image of his, he talked with the public for five years, in two steps, namely: in 1853-54, placing his works in the magazine. "Sovremennik", in the "Yeralash" section, under the general title: "Leisure of Kozma Prutkov"; and in 1860 - 64, published in the same magazine in the "Whistle" section, under the general title "Down and Feathers (Daunen und Federn)". In addition, during his second appearance before the public, some of his works (see about this in the first callout of this essay) were published in the journal. "Iskra" and one in the magazine. "Entertainment", 1861, No. 18. The intervening six years, between the two appearances of Kozma Prutkov in the press, were for him those years of agonizing embarrassment and despair, which were mentioned above.

In both of his short-term appearances in the press, Kozma Prutkov turned out to be amazingly diverse, namely: a poet, a fabulist, a historian (see his “Excerpts from Grandfather’s Notes”), and a philosopher (see his “Fruits of Meditation”), and a dramatic writer . And after his death, it turned out that at the same time he managed to write government projects, as a bold and determined administrator (see his project: “On the introduction of unanimity in Russia”, printed without this title, with his obituary, in Sovremennik, 1863, book IV). And in all kinds of this versatile activity, he was equally sharp, resolute, self-confident. In this respect he was the son of his time, which was distinguished by self-confidence and disrespect for obstacles. That was, as you know, the time of the famous teaching: "zeal overcomes everything." It is hardly even Kozma Prutkov who was the first to formulate this doctrine in the aforementioned phrase, when he was still in minor ranks? At least, it is found in his “Fruits of Thought” under No. 84. Faithful to this teaching and excited by his guardians, Kozma Prutkov did not doubt that he only needed to apply zeal to take possession of all knowledge and talents. The question is, however: 1) to what does Kozma Prutkov owe the fact that, despite his low qualities, he so quickly acquired and still retains the glory and sympathy of the public? and 2) what guided his guardians by developing these qualities in him?

To resolve these important issues, it is necessary to delve into the essence of the matter, “look at the root”, in the words of Kozma Prutkov; and then the personality of Kozma Prutkov will turn out to be as dramatic and enigmatic as the personality of Hamlet. Both of them cannot do without comments, and both inspire sympathy for themselves, although for different reasons. Kozma Prutkov was obviously the victim of the three persons mentioned, who arbitrarily became his guardians or slanderers. They treated him like "false friends", exhibited in tragedies and dramas. They, under the guise of friendship, developed in him such qualities that they wanted to ridicule in public. Under their influence, he adopted from other people who had success: courage, complacency, self-confidence, even impudence, and began to consider his every thought, every scripture and saying - the truth worthy of utterance. He suddenly considered himself a dignitary in the field of thought and began to smugly expose his narrow-mindedness and his ignorance, which otherwise would have remained unknown outside the walls of the Assay House. From this it is clear, however, that his guardians, or "false friends," did not give him any new bad qualities: they only encouraged him, and thus they called out such qualities of him that had been hidden until the accident. Encouraged by his slanderers, he himself began to demand that they listen to him; and when they began to listen to him, he showed such a self-confident misunderstanding of reality, as if there was a label over every word and work of his; "everything human is alien to me."

The self-confidence, self-satisfaction and mental limitations of Kozma Prutkov expressed themselves especially clearly in his “Fruits of Meditation”, that is, in his “Thoughts and Aphorisms”. Usually the form of aphorisms is used to convey the conclusions of worldly wisdom; but Kozma Prutkov took advantage of it in a different way. For the most part of his aphorisms, he either speaks with dignity "official" vulgarities, or breaks with an effort through open doors, or expresses such "thoughts" that not only have no relation to his time and country, but, as it were, are outside of all time and whatever the area. At the same time, in his aphorisms one often hears not advice, not instruction, but a command. His famous "Bdi!" reminiscent of a military command: "Ply!" And in general, Kozma Prutkov spoke out so smugly, boldly and persistently that he made me believe in his wisdom. According to the proverb: “the courage of the city takes”, Kozma Prutkov won literary fame for himself with his courage. Being mentally handicapped, he gave wisdom advice; not being a poet, he wrote poetry and dramatic works; believing to be a historian, he told jokes, having neither education nor even the slightest understanding of the needs of the fatherland, he composed management projects for him. - "Eagerness overcomes everything! .."

The aforementioned three guardians of Kozma Prutkov carefully developed in him such qualities, in which he turned out to be completely unnecessary for his country; and, besides this, they ruthlessly robbed him of all such that might make him at least a little useful. The presence of the former and the absence of the latter are equally comical, and just as Kozma Prutkov retained a deep, innate good nature, which makes him innocent in all antics, he turned out to be amusing and sympathetic. Therein lies the drama of his position. Therefore, he can rightly be called the victim of his guardians: he unconsciously and against his will amused, serving their purposes. Without these guardians, he would hardly have dared, while he was only the director of the Assay Office, to expose himself so frankly, self-confidently and smugly to the public.

But is it fair to reproach Kozma Prutkov's guardians for making him look funny? After all, only through this they brought him fame and sympathy of the public; and Kozma Prutkov loved fame. He even rejected in print the validity of the opinion that "glory is smoke." He confessed in print that he "wants fame," that "glory amuses a man." His guardians guessed that he would never understand the comical nature of his fame and would childishly enjoy it.

And he really enjoyed his fame with enthusiasm, until his death, always believing in his extraordinary and diverse gifts. He was proud of himself and happy: the most well-intentioned guardians would not have given him more than that.

The glory of Kozma Prutkov was established so quickly that in the very first year of his public literary activity (in 1853) he was already busy preparing a separate edition of his works with a portrait. For this, three artists were then invited by him, who painted and redrawn on a stone his portrait, printed in the same 1853, in the lithograph of Tyulin, in a significant number of copies. 2
These artists were then students of the Academy of Arts, who studied and lived together: Lev Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov, Alexander Egorovich Veideman and Lev Feliksovich Lagorio. Their original drawing is still preserved by L. M. Zhemchuzhnikov. Tyulin's lithograph mentioned here was located in St. Petersburg on Vasilyevsky Island along the 5th line, against the Academy of Arts

For some reason, the then censorship did not allow the release of this portrait; as a result, the entire publication did not take place. The following year, it turned out that all the printed copies of the portrait, except for five that were retained by the publishers immediately after printing, disappeared, along with the stone, when Tyulin's lithography premises were changed in 1854 in the new lithography premises. Subsequently, some persons acquired these missing copies by purchase at Apraksin Dvor; that is why the present edition includes a photohyalotype copy, in a reduced format, from one of the surviving copies of that portrait, and not genuine prints.

Treasuring the memory of Kozma Prutkov, one cannot fail to point out those details of his appearance and clothing, which he attributed to the artists in the portrait as a special merit; namely: skillfully curled and disheveled, chestnut, with gray hair; two warts: one at the top of the right side of the forehead, and the other at the top of the left cheekbone; a piece of black English plaster around his neck, under his right cheekbone, where he used to get regular razor cuts; long, sharp ends of a shirt collar sticking out from under a colored scarf tied around the neck with a wide and long loop; a cloak-almaviva, with a black velvet collar, picturesquely thrown over the shoulder at one end; the left hand, tightly covered with a white suede glove of a special cut, exposed from under the almaviva, with expensive rings over the glove (these rings were granted to him on various occasions).

When the portrait of Kozma Prutkov was already painted on the stone, he demanded that a lyre be added below, from which rays emanate upward.

The artists satisfied this desire of his, as far as possible in the finished portrait; but in the reduced copy from the portrait, attached to the present edition, these poetic rays, unfortunately, are hardly noticeable.

Kozma Prutkov never abandoned his intention to publish his works separately. In 1860, he even announced in print (in the journal Sovremennik, in a footnote to the poem Disappointment) about their forthcoming publication; but circumstances have prevented the fulfillment of this intention of his until now. Now it is carried out, among other things, to protect the type and literary rights of Kozma Prutkov, which belong exclusively to his literary founders named in this essay.

In view of the erroneous indications in the press about the participation of various other persons in the activities of Kozma Prutkov, it seems useful to repeat the information about their cooperation:

Firstly, the literary personality of Kozma Prutkov was created and developed by three persons, namely: Count Alexei Konstantinovich Tolstoy, Alexei Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov and Vladimir Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov.

Secondly: The cooperation in this matter was rendered by two persons, in the amount specified here, namely:

1) Alexander Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov, who took a very significant part in composing not only three fables: “Forget-me-nots and calves”, “The Conductor and the Tarantula” and “The Heron and the Racing Drama”, but also the comedy “Blondes” and the unfinished comedy “Love and Silin” (see about it in the initial callout), and

2) Pyotr Pavlovich Ershov, the famous writer of the fairy tale "The Little Humpbacked Horse", to whom several verses were delivered, placed in the second picture of the operetta: "Skulls, that is, Phrenologist" 3
P. P. Ershov personally handed over these couplets to V. M. Zhemchuzhnikov in Tobolsk, in 1854, declaring his desire: “Let Kozma Prutkov use them, because I myself no longer write anything.” Incidentally, in the biography of P. P. Ershov, published by Mr. Yaroslavtsev in 1872, on page 49 there is an excerpt from Ershov’s letter dated March 5, 1837, in which he mentions “couplets” for the vaudeville “Skulls”, written by his friend "Chzhov". Were it not these "couplets" who were handed over to P.P. Ershov in 1854? They also had the title "Skulls".

And thirdly: therefore, no one - neither from the editors and employees of the Sovremennik magazine, nor from all other Russian writers - had the slightest participation in the authorship of Kozma Prutkov.

"Leisure" and "Down and Feathers" 4
The heading "Leisure" and "Down and Feathers" combines the titles of two publications in 1854 ("Literary jumble") and 1860 ("Whistle").

Foreword 5
First published in Sovremennik, 1854, No. 2.

Reader, here are my "Leisure" ... Judge impartially! This is only part of the writing. I have been writing since childhood. I have a lot of unfinished (d'inachev?). I am publishing an excerpt. You ask: Why? Answer: I want fame. - Glory amuses a person. Glory, they say, "smoke"; it is not true. I don't believe it!

I am a poet, a gifted poet! I made sure of it; I became convinced by reading others: if they are poets, so am I! .. Judge, I say, for yourself. Yes, judge impartially. I'm looking for justice; no indulgence is needed, I do not ask for indulgence! ..

Goodbye reader! If you like these essays, read others.

I have a large stock, a lot of materials; only an architect is needed, an architect is needed; I am a good architect!

Goodbye reader! Look, read with attention, but do not remember dashingly!

Your well-wisher is Kozma Prutkov.

Letter from the famous Kozma Prutkov to an unknown feuilletonist 6
Full title - Letter from the famous Kozma Prutkov to the unknown columnist of the St. Petersburg Vedomosti (1854) regarding the article of this latter, for the first time - in Sovremennik, 1854, No. 6.

Feuilletonist, I ran through your article in No. 80 of the St. Petersburg Vedomosti. You mention me in it; it's nothing. But you unreasonably blaspheme me in it! I will not praise you for this, although you obviously want my praise.

Are you saying that I write parodies? Not at all!.. I don't write parodies at all! I never wrote parodies! Where did you get the idea that I write parodies? I have simply analyzed in my mind most of the successful poets; this analysis led me to a synthesis; for the talents, scattered among other poets separately, turned out to be combined all in me as one! .. Having come to such a consciousness, I decided to write. Having decided to write, I wished for glory. Wishing for fame, I chose the surest path to it: imitation precisely to those poets who have already acquired it to some extent. Do you hear? - “imitation”, not a parody! .. Where did you get the idea that I write parodies ?!

In this direction, I also wrote “The Dispute of the Ancient Greek Philosophers about the Graceful”. How do you, feuilletonist, assure that for him "there is no model in modern literature"? I, firm in my direction, like flint, could not have written this “Dispute” if I had not seen for it “a model in modern literature”! .. It seemed to you outdated form this "Dispute"; and it's not like that! The form is the most ordinary, colloquial, dramatic, fully corresponding to this, truly dramatic, my creation! .. And where did you see that dramatic works were not written in colloquial form ?!

Then you, like others, seem to attribute to my pen the Dwarfs and other Scenes from Everyday Life? Oh, this is a cruel mistake! You read the table of contents, delve into my works and then you will understand how twice two makes four: what is mine in Yeralashi and what is not mine! ..

Listen, feuilletonist! - I see from your style that you are still a beginner in literature, but you have already managed to fill your hand; This is good! Now you have to seek glory; Glory amuses a person!.. Glory, they say, "smoke", but it's not true! Don't believe it, feuilletonist! - So, in the name of your literary glory, I ask you: do not call my works parodies in advance! Otherwise, I will also begin to assure that all your feuilletons are nothing but parodies; for they are like two drops of water similar to all other newspaper feuilletons!

Between my works, on the contrary, not only are there no parodies, but not even all imitation; but there are real, genuine and large nuggets! .. That's how you parody me, and very unsuccessfully! For example, you say: “Parody should be directed against something that has more or less(!) serious meaning; otherwise it will be empty fun. Yes, this is straight from my aphorism: “Throwing pebbles into the water, look at the circles they form; otherwise, such throwing will be empty fun! .. "

Current page: 1 (total book has 9 pages)

Font:

100% +

Kozma Prutkov
Favorites

self-portrait

Kozma Prutkov: created and creators

In 1854, a new name appeared on the horizon of Russian poetry - Kozma Prutkov. Nekrasov's magazine Sovremennik, which by that time had discovered many talents, did not miscalculate this time either. True, the writings of the novice author were published on the pages of a humorous supplement to the magazine - in the "Literary Jumble", but after all, Turgenev first saw his "Khorya and Kalinich" in the "Mixture" section of the same "Contemporary", and now he is a well-known author of "Notes hunter"...

It was evident that the new poet was full of hope and enthusiasm.
I will forever sing and enjoy the song,
I will forever drink the bewitching nectar.
Get out, crowd!.. Enough mocking!
Do you know Prutkov's gift ?!

However, already in the next stanza of this poem, under the significant title "To the crowd", the author changed contempt for indulgence towards her:

Wait! .. Tell me: why are you laughing so viciously?
Tell me: what have you been waiting for so long from me?
Is it flattering praise?! No, you can't wait for them!
I do not change my calling to the coffin,
But with the truth on their lips, a trembling smile,
With a bile snake in a worn out chest,
I will guide you in verses, scorching fire,
On the path from the wrong path!

Having thus declared his creative program, Prutkov, with no less passion, began to bring it to life. As you can see, he was especially fond of genres that contributed to the correction of morals, the denunciation of vice: fables, comedies, epigrams ...

To me, in deep thought,
Lysimachus once said:
“What a sighted person sees with a healthy eye,
A blind man can't see even with glasses!

Lysimachus is a stern Stoic philosopher during the decline of Rome. Yes, and Kozma Prutkov himself is no stranger to craving for the winged word. His “Fruits of Meditation” is published - a set of chased aphorisms, among which are the now famous “Look at the root!”, “No one will embrace the immensity”, “Do not walk on the slope, you will trample your boots!”, As well as many others, no less expressive: “The first step of a baby is the first step towards his death”, “Click a mare in the nose - she will wave her tail”, “Encouragement is as necessary for a brilliant writer as rosin is needed for a virtuoso bow”, “What is better? “Comparing the past, bring it to the present!”

Following the last aphorism, Kozma Prutkov published "The Historical Materials of Fedot Kuzmich Prutkov (grandfather)", modestly declaring in the preface: "My whole family was engaged in literature" - and promising, following his grandfather's notes, to publish his father's notes and his own.

True, those did not appear, but after his death, respectful descendants spoke in detail about the life and creative path of this statesman and literary figure. The reader has learned that K. P. Prutkov rose to the high rank of real state councilor and director of the Assay Chamber, that in addition to works of belles-lettres, he created “government projects”, of which the most famous is “On the introduction of unanimity in Russia”, which, however, in that time was not implemented.

The artists, delighted with the glory of Prutkov, created his portrait, and the depicted demanded that a lyre be added below, from which rays emanate upward. The wish was granted. Subsequently, a bust of the poet appeared, now stored in the local history museum of the city of Tambov, and at the end of the 20th century, a sculpture of Kozma Prutkov was erected in the Bryansk park-museum named after A. K. Tolstoy. It can be added that Prutkov's writings were quoted by Turgenev and Herzen, Goncharov and Saltykov-Shchedrin. Prutkov's long poem "The Siege of Pamba" is read by the characters of Dostoevsky's novel "The Village of Stepanchikovo and Its Inhabitants". And in other works of the writer, the name of this writer appears, according to Dostoevsky, “the beauty of our time” ...

Such is Kozma Petrovich Prutkov (1803-1863) - one of the amazing and bright creations of Russian literary and social life. It's not a secret for anyone: he himself, with his entire biography and pedigree, with fables, poems, plays, aphorisms, was invented by the poet Alexei Konstantinovich Tolstoy and his cousins ​​- Alexei and Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikovs. Other Zhemchuzhnikovs also contributed - Alexander and Lev (he, along with the artists Beideman and Lagorio, portrayed Prutkov), as well as the poet Pyotr Ershov, author of the famous "Humpbacked Horse". But this official-poet was not at all a mere pastime for them.

Yes, the poet Alexei Tolstoy, the eldest among the brothers, loved jokes, fun, by nature he had an absolute sense of humor. Yes, the poet Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov remained faithful to the themes of Russian satirical poetry for decades. Yes, the whole friendly atmosphere of the large Zhemchuzhnikov family was permeated with cheerfulness and at the same time rejection of the inert, bureaucratic, stupid.

There are many stories about the pranks that the brothers arranged in bureaucratic Petersburg. One day, one of them, dressed in the uniform of an aide-de-camp, that is, an officer of the imperial retinue, traveled around St. Petersburg architects at night, conveying the alleged command of Nicholas I to appear in the palace the next morning due to the fact that St. Isaac's Cathedral had fallen into the ground. His Majesty was very dissatisfied with this joke ...

But over time, youthful rejection of the regulated way of life in the capital and all of Russian life (“Our Earth is rich, there is only no order in it,” wrote A. K. Tolstoy in the famous satirical chronicle) began to be replaced by reflections on the creative essence of human nature, on genuine values ​​of life.

When preparing the first Complete Works of Kozma Prutkov in 1884, the Zhemchuzhnikovs said that by creating Prutkov, they "developed in him such qualities that they wanted to ridicule publicly." Prutkov “took over from other people who were successful: courage, complacency, self-confidence, even impudence and began to consider his every thought, every writing and saying - the truth, worthy of disclosure. He suddenly considered himself a dignitary in the field of thought and began to smugly expose his narrow-mindedness and his ignorance. The idea, widespread in Russian life, that an official, the flesh of the flesh of the state mechanism, has the sole right to the truth, including in the areas of intellectual activity, creativity, which in itself paralyzes creative forces, was put on public display and obvious ridicule. “According to the proverb:“ Courage takes the city ”, Kozma Prutkov won literary fame for himself with courage. Being mentally handicapped, he gave wisdom advice, not being a poet, he wrote poems and dramatic works, believing to be a historian, he told anecdotes, having neither education nor even the slightest understanding of the needs of the fatherland, he composed management projects for him, - „ Diligence overcomes everything!’”

If Prutkov himself, with his, so to speak, biographical and mental data, is a satire on our eternal Russian bureaucrat, on the undying type of bureaucratic thinking, then the “lyrics” of the director of the Assay Chamber parody those literary forms and means that, with the development of poetry, have worn out, become banal and are perceived by readers without any aesthetic experiences, and thoughts - as a kind of walking morality, dull edification.

But the very figure of Prutkov served Russian literature in good stead. The idea of ​​literature as a servant of the state was brought to the point of absurdity in his writings and henceforth could not be taken seriously. By its very existence, this image convinces the reader of the impossibility of reducing poetry to clerical instructions, genuine, free inspiration to the search for encouragement. Any literary administrator who forgot about this sooner or later found himself in Prutkov's position.

Sergey Dmitrenko

Fruits of reflection thoughts and aphorisms

1

The wedding ring is the first link in the chain of married life.

2

Our life can be conveniently compared with a capricious river, on the surface of which a boat floats, sometimes rocked by a quiet streaming wave, often delayed in its movement by a shallow and broken on an underwater stone. Is it necessary to mention that this fragile boat in the market of fleeting time is none other than man himself?

3

No one will embrace the immensity.

4

There is no thing so great that it would not be surpassed in magnitude by an even greater one. There is no thing so small that something even smaller cannot fit into it.

5

Look at the root!

6

Better say little, but good.

7

Science refines the mind; learning sharpens the memory.

8

What will others say about you if you can't say anything about yourself?

9

Self-sacrifice is the target for every shooter's bullet.

10

A person's memory is like a sheet of white paper: sometimes it will be written well, and sometimes badly.

11

A fading memory is like a dying lamp.

12

A weakening memory can also be compared to a fading forget-me-not.

13

I will always liken weaker eyes to an old tarnished mirror, even a cracked one.

14

The imagination of a poet, dejected by grief, is like a foot enclosed in a new boot.

15

Passionately in love with one person, he endures another only by calculation.

16

If you want to be handsome, join the hussars.

17

Man, not being clothed with beneficent nature, received from above the gift of tailoring.

18

If there were no tailors, tell me: how would you distinguish between service departments?

19

Hiding the truth from friends, to whom will you open up?

20

What is better? - Compare the past and compare it with the present.

21

It is more useful to traverse the path of life than the entire universe.

22

If you have a fountain, shut it up; let the fountain rest.

23

A married rake is like a sparrow.

24

A diligent physician is like a pelican.

25

An egoist is like one who has been sitting in a well for a long time.

26

Genius is like a hill rising on a plain.

Mazurovsky V. Fight for the banner (fragment)

27

Smart speeches are like lines printed in italics.

28

I will boldly liken the beginning of a clear day to the birth of an innocent baby: perhaps the first will not do without rain, and the life of the second without tears.

29

If the shadows of objects did not depend on the magnitude of these latter, but had their own arbitrary growth, then, perhaps, not a single bright place would soon remain on the entire globe.

30

Shooting at a target exercises the hand and causes fidelity to the eye.

31

Berdysh in the hands of a warrior is the same as a well-aimed word in the hands of a writer.

32

The magnetic needle, irresistibly drawn to the north, is like a husband who observes the laws.

33

The first step of a baby is the first step towards his death.

34

Death is set at the end of life in order to more conveniently prepare for it.

35

In a house without tenants, you will not find known insects.

36

Don't take anything to extremes: a person who wants to eat too late runs the risk of eating the next day in the morning.

37

Food is as necessary to health as decent treatment is necessary to an educated person.

38

“Why,” says the egoist, “will I work for posterity when it has done absolutely nothing for me?” “You are unjust, fool!” Posterity has already done for you that, bringing the past closer to the present and the future, you can arbitrarily consider yourself: a baby, a youth and an old man.

39

Melt the wax, but keep the honey.

40

Explanatory expressions explain dark thoughts.

41

Not every person even has a hussar uniform to face.

42

43

The chamberlain rarely enjoys nature.

44

No one will embrace the immensity.

45

Three things, once started, it is difficult to finish: a) eat good food; b) talk with a friend who has returned from a campaign and c) scratch where it itches.

46

Before you get to know a person, find out: is his acquaintance pleasant to others?

47

Health without strength is the same as firmness without resilience.

48

Everyone says that health is the most precious thing; but no one follows it.

49

The wealth of a dissolute person is equal to a short blanket: if you pull it up to your nose, your legs will be exposed.

50

Do not irritate the wounds of your neighbor: offer a balm to the suffering one... Digging a hole for another, you yourself will fall into it.

51

If you are asked: what is more useful, the sun or the moon? - answer: a month. For the sun shines during the day, when it is already light; and the moon at night.

52

But, on the other hand: the sun is better because it shines and warms; but the moon only shines, and then only on a moonlit night!

Kulikov I. S. Portrait of A. S. Uvarov

53

Self-love and love of glory are the best evidence of the immortality of the human soul.

Discuss only about what your concepts allow you to do this. Thus: not knowing the laws of the Iroquois language, can you make such a judgment on this subject that would not be unreasonably stupid?

56

When you get down to business, take heart.

57

A pen that writes for money, I can boldly liken to a hurdy-gurdy in the hands of a wandering foreigner.

58

Click the mare in the nose - she will wave her tail.

59

Do not be shy before the enemy: man's worst enemy is himself.

60

And turpentine is good for anything!

61

Each one necessarily benefits when used in its place. On the contrary: the exercises of the best dance master in chemistry are out of place; the advice of an experienced astronomer in dancing is stupid.

62

Time is measured by clocks, and human life is measured by time; but with what, tell me, will you measure the depth of the Eastern Ocean?

63

They say that labor kills time; but this latter, without diminishing in the least, continues to serve humanity and the entire universe constantly in the same fullness and continuity.

64

There is sediment at the bottom of every heart.

65

Insidious thoughts lurk under sweet expressions: for example, a tobacco smoker often smells of perfume.

66

Many things are incomprehensible to us, not because our concepts are weak; but because these things do not enter the circle of our concepts.

67

No one will embrace the immensity!

68

Chatterbox is like a pendulum: both must be stopped.

69

Two people of the same build would not fight for long if the strength of one overcame the strength of the other.

70

Not all cut that grows.

71

Nails and hair are given to man in order to give him a constant, but easy occupation.

72

Another singer sometimes wheezes.

73

Encouragement is just as necessary for a brilliant writer as rosin is necessary for a virtuoso's bow.

74

Having lied once, who will believe you?

75

Life is an album. Man is a pencil. Business is a landscape. Time is gumelastic: it bounces and erases.

76

It is easier to keep laughing than to stop laughing.

77

Look into the distance - you will see the distance; look at the sky - you will see the sky; looking in a small mirror, you will see only yourself.

78

Where is the beginning of the end with which the beginning ends?

79

The sooner you go, the sooner you arrive.

80

If you want to be happy, be it.

Kramskoy I. N. Mina Moiseev

81

Seek unity not in the totality, but rather in the uniformity of division.

82

He who is diligent in service should not be afraid of his ignorance; for every new case he will read.

83

The rooster wakes up early; but the villain is even earlier.

84

Perseverance conquers all!

85

What we have, we do not store; lost - weep.

86

And the oyster has enemies!

87

A renewed wound is much worse than a new one.

88

In the depths of every breast there is a snake.

89

Only in the public service you learn the truth.

90

I will boldly liken another strolling old man to an hourglass.

91

Do not joke with women: these jokes are stupid and indecent.

92

An excessively rich man who does not help the poor is like a hefty nurse suckling her own breast with gusto at the cradle of a starving child.

93

The magnet points north and south; it depends on a person to choose a good or bad path of life.

94

Do not pull leggings on other people's legs.

95

Man is bifurcated from below, and not from above, so that two supports are more reliable than one.

96

A person is in correspondence with the entire globe, and through the press communicates even with distant offspring.

97

The stupidest man was the one who invented tassels for decoration and gold studs on furniture.

98

Many people are like sausages: what they stuff them with, they carry them in themselves.

99

A sensitive person is like an icicle; warm it up, it will melt.

100

Many officials are like a steel pen.

101

A specialist is like a flux: his fullness is one-sided.

102

In the building of human happiness, friendship builds walls, and love forms a dome.

103

Looking at tall people and tall objects, hold your cap by the visor.

104

Spit in the eyes of those who say that you can embrace the immensity!

105

The globe, circulating in boundless space, serves as a pedestal for everything found on it.

106

If you read the inscription "buffalo" on the cage of an elephant, do not believe your eyes.

107

Ant eggs are more than the creature that gave birth to them; so the glory of a gifted person is far longer than his own life.

108

Every thing is a form of manifestation of infinite diversity.

Dow J. Portrait of A. A. Tuchkov-fourth

109

All parts of the globe have their own, even sometimes very curious, other parts.

110

Looking at the world, one cannot help but be surprised!

111

The most remote point on the globe is close to something, and the closest to something is far away.

112

The philosopher easily triumphs over future and past sorrows, but he is easily defeated by the present.

113

The sky, dotted with stars, I will always liken to the chest of an honored general.

114

Dobliy 1
Valiant (Church Slav.).

The husband is like a mausoleum.

115

Waxa blackens with benefit, and an evil person with pleasure.

116

Vices are part of virtue, as poisonous drugs are part of curative remedies.

117

Of all fruits, a good upbringing brings the best.

118

Love, supported, like fire, by incessant movement, disappears together with hope and fear.

119

It is calculated that a Petersburger living in the sun wins twenty percent of his health.

120

A man was given two hands for that end, so that he, taking with his left, would distribute with his right.

121

Sometimes it is enough to scold a person so as not to be deceived by him!

122

Do not look for salvation in a separate treaty.

123

A jealous husband is like a Turk.

124

Almost every person is like a vessel with taps, filled with the life-giving moisture of the productive forces.

125

A smart woman is like Semiramide.

126

Any fat is like a wagtail.

127

The messenger is like a sieve.

128

Girls in general are like checkers: not everyone succeeds, but everyone wants to get into kings.

129

Always stay alert!

130

The tranquility of many would be more reliable if it were allowed to attribute all troubles to public account.

131

Do not walk on the slope, you will stop boots!

132

I advise everyone: even in not particularly damp and windy weather, lay your ears with cotton paper or sea rope.

133

Who's stopping you from inventing waterproof gunpowder?

134

Snow is considered a shroud of dead nature; but it also serves as the first path for life supplies. So discover nature!

135

The barometer in agriculture can be replaced with great profit by an industrious servant suffering from deliberate rheumatism.

Ge N. N. Portrait of the writer and public figure Elena Osipovna Likhacheva

136

A dog sitting on hay is harmful. A chicken sitting on eggs is healthy. From a sedentary life they grow fat: so, every money changer is fat.

137

Wrong wealth is like watercress - it grows on every felt.

138

Every human head is like a stomach: one digests the food that enters into it, and the other becomes clogged from it.

139

Things are great and small, not only by the will of fate and circumstances, but also according to the concepts of each.

140

And sago, used in excess, can be harmful.

141

Looking at the sun, squint your eyes, and you will boldly discern spots in it.

142

Time is like a skillful steward, constantly producing new talents to replace those that have disappeared.

143

Talents measure the progress of civilization, and they also provide the milestones of history, serving as telegrams from ancestors and contemporaries to posterity.

144

And with railways it is better to keep the gig.

145

Submission cools anger and gives dimension to mutual feelings.

146

If everything past were present, and the present continued to exist with the future, who would be able to make out: where are the causes and where are the consequences?

147

Happiness is like a ball that rolls up: today under one, tomorrow under another, the day after tomorrow under a third, then under a fourth, fifth, etc., according to the number and queue of happy people.

148

Others insist that everyone's life is written in the book of Genesis.

149

I don’t quite understand: why do many people call fate a turkey, and not some other bird more like fate?

150

151

The best thing seems to everyone is what he has a desire for.

152

The publication of some newspapers, magazines, and even books can be beneficial.

153

Never lose sight of the fact that it is much easier to displease many than to please.

154

A good ruler is justly likened to a coachman.

155

A good cigar is like the globe: it turns for the pleasure of man.

156

Throwing stones into the water, look at the circles they form; otherwise such throwing will be empty fun.

157

Piety, bigotry, superstition - three different things.

158

Degree is a reliable spring in the mechanism of community life.

159

For many, skating produces shortness of breath and shaking.

160

Again I will say: no one will embrace the immensity!

Works by Kozma Prutkov

Biographical information about Kozma Prutkov

Sources:

1) Personal information.

2) Works by Kozma Prutkov.

The works of Kozma Prutkov were first published exclusively in the journal. Sovremennik 1851, 1853-1854 and 1860-1864 (in 1851, only three of his fables were placed there, without a signature, in the Notes of the New Poet). Subsequently, in the early 1860s. several (mostly the weakest) of his works were published in the journal. "Spark"; and in 1861 was placed in the journal. "Entertainment", No. 18, his comedy "Love and Silin". Then in 1881 it was printed for the first time in gas. "New Time", No. 2026, the fable "The Star and the Belly". Here are all the publications in which the works of Kozma Prutkov were printed.

The present Complete Works of Kozma Prutkov includes everything that he ever published, except for the following: a) poems: “Return from Kronstadt”, “To friends after marriage”, “To the crowd”, an epigram about Diogenes, the same about Lysimakhe and the fable "Heels inopportune", b) several aphorisms, c) several "excerpts from grandfather's notes", d) the comedy "Love and Silin" and e) the project: "On the introduction of unanimity in Russia". Among these works of K. Prutkov, not included in this edition, poems, aphorisms and stories of his grandfather were excluded by him from the collection of his works being prepared due to their weakness; com. "Love and Silin" was excluded by him because it was printed without his knowledge, before its final finishing; and the project “on unanimity” was excluded by the publishers because it is an official, and not a literary work by K. Prutkov. But, in addition to the previously published works of Kozma Prutkov, the present edition includes many of those that have not yet been in print.

3) "Obituary of Kozma Petrovich Prutkov", in the journal. "Contemporary", 1863, book. IV, signed by K. I. Sherstobitov [In the St. Petersburg Vedomosti of 1876, fictitious information about Kozma Prutkov was printed, incorrectly signed also by the name of K. I. Sherstobitov]

4) "Correspondence" of Mr. Alexei Zhemchuzhnikov, to the gas. "St. Petersburg Vedomosti", 1874, No. 37, about the "Anthology for Everyone" published by Mr. Gerbel. 5) Articles: "Protection of the memory of Kozma Prutkov", in the gas. "New Time", 1877, No. 892 and 1881, No. 2026, signed: "An indispensable member of Kozma Prutkov." 6) Letter to the editor of the Vek magazine from Mr. Vladimir Zhemchuzhnikov, in the newspapers: "Voice", 1883, No. 40 and "New Time", 1883, No. 2496. 7) Article: "The Origin of the Pseudonym Kozma Prutkov" A. Zhemchuzhnikova, placed in the "News", 1883, No. 20.

Kozma Petrovich Prutkov spent his entire life, except for the years of childhood and early adolescence, in the public service: first in the military department, and then in the civil service. He was born April 11, 1803; died January 13, 1863

In the Obituary and in other articles about him, attention was drawn to the following two facts: first, that he marked all his printed prose articles on the 11th of April or any other month; and secondly, that he wrote his own name: Kozma, not Kuzma. Both of these facts are true; but the first of them was misunderstood. It was believed that, marking his works with the 11th number, he wanted to commemorate his birthday each time; in fact, he did not commemorate his birthday with such a mark, but his wonderful dream, probably only coincidentally coincided with his birthday and had an impact on his whole life. The content of this dream is described below, according to Kozma Prutkov himself. As for the way he wrote his name, in reality he was not even written "Kozma", but Kosma, like his famous namesakes: Kosma and Damian, Kosma Minin, Kosma Medici and a few others like him.

In 1820, he entered the military service, only for the uniform, and stayed in this service for just over two years, in the hussars. It was at this time that he had the aforementioned dream. Namely: on the night of April 10, 1823, returning home late from a comrade's drinking bout and barely lying down on his bed, he saw in front of him a naked brigadier general, in epaulettes, who, having lifted him from the bed by the hand and not allowing him to get dressed, silently led him along some long and dark corridors to the top of a high and pointed mountain, and there he began to take out various precious materials in front of him from the ancient crypt, showing them to him one after another and even putting some of them to his chilled body. Prutkov expected with bewilderment and fear the denouement of this incomprehensible event; but suddenly, from the touch of the most expensive of these matters, he felt a strong electric shock throughout his body, from which he woke up covered in perspiration. It is not known what significance Kozma Petrovich Prutkov attached to this vision. But, often talking about him later, op always got into great excitement and ended his story with a loud exclamation: “On the same morning, barely waking up, I decided to leave the regiment and resigned; and when the resignation came out, I immediately decided to serve in the Ministry of Finance, in the Assay Office, where I will stay forever! - Indeed, having entered the Assay Chamber in 1823, he remained there until his death, that is, until January 13, 1863. The authorities distinguished and rewarded him. Here, in this Tabernacle, he was honored to receive all civil ranks, up to and including the actual state councilor, and the highest position: director of the Assay Tabernacle; and then the Order of St. Stanislav of the 1st degree, who always seduced him, as can be seen from the fable "The Star and the Belly."

In general, he was very pleased with his service. Only during the period of preparing the reforms of the last reign, he seemed to be at a loss. At first it seemed to him that the soil was leaving from under him, and he began to grumble, shouting everywhere about the prematureness of any reforms and that he was “the enemy of all so-called questions!”. However, later, when the inevitability of reforms became undeniable, he himself tried to distinguish himself by reforming projects and was very indignant when these projects rejected him for their obvious failure. He explained this by envy, disrespect for experience and merit, and began to fall into despondency, even despair. In one of the moments of such gloomy despair, he wrote a mystery: “The Affinity of the World Forces”, which is published for the first time in this edition and quite correctly conveys the then painful state of his spirit [In the same state of mind, he wrote the poem “Before the Sea of ​​Life”, also published for the first time in present edition]. Soon, however, he calmed down, felt the old atmosphere around him, and under him the old soil. He again began to write projects, but in a shy direction, and they were accepted with approval. This gave him reason to return to his former complacency and expect a significant promotion. A sudden nervous shock that befell him in the director's office of the Assay Tent, at the very departure of the service, put an end to these hopes, ending his glorious days. This edition contains for the first time his "Death" poem, recently found in the secret file of the Assay Chamber.

But no matter how great his service successes and virtues, they alone would not have brought him even a hundredth of the glory that he acquired through his literary activity. Meanwhile, he had been in public service (including the hussars) for more than forty years, and in the literary field he acted publicly for only five years (in 1853-54 and in the 1860s).

Until 1850, precisely before his accidental acquaintance with a small circle of young people, consisting of several Zhemchuzhnikov brothers and their cousin, Count Alexei Konstantinovich Tolstoy, Kozma Petrovich Prutkov never thought about literary or any other public activities. He understood himself only as an assiduous official of the Assay Chamber and did not dream of anything further in official success. In 1850, Count A. K. Tolstoy and Alexei Mikhailovich Zhemchuzhnikov, not foreseeing serious consequences from their undertaking, took it into their heads to assure him that they saw in him remarkable talents for dramatic creativity. He, believing them, wrote under their leadership the comedy "Fantasy", which was performed on stage with. - Petersburg Alexandria Theatre, in the highest presence, on January 8, 1851, for the benefit performance of the then favorite of the public, Mr. Maksimov 1st. On the same evening, however, she was withdrawn from the theatrical repertoire, by special order; this can only be explained by the originality of the plot and the bad acting of the actors. It is being printed for the first time only now.