The man is talking about the woman. When he looks at her

What is it you need to know about men in order to build normal relationships with them?
How often do you think why men are inherently complex?

It's no secret that they think the same about women.

Maybe it's because we spend too much time trying to understand each other. But it would be more efficient to spend it on studying each other. It may seem to many that the difference here is small. I assure you it is not.

We talk too much about each other, but it's better to talk to each other. Do you feel the difference?

I'll explain with an example. During my programs, students often ask me why “is he reacting like that”? And I say, “Why ask me? Ask your man." Talk to him, ask for his opinion.

But, even if such conversations are conducted in a couple, most often they turn into monologues from the female side.

How to find out, what men want

It just so happens that men are more secretive than women. It is much harder for us to open up and talk about our feelings.That is why many women, even in their entire lives, fail to understandwhat men want.

The truth is that men have no supernatural desires. It is clear that they all want to be the best in what they do, to receive recognition for this and to realize themselves in society. A woman just wants to be happy.

To help find a solution for both sides, in this article I will explain,What. This will make you understandwhat men wantin a relationship. And why do they need a woman.

The following 10 facts about us may seem quite unexpected and perhaps even unbelievable to you. The reason for this is that we don't often talk about such things. After all, it seems to us that this is self-evident.

1. In fact, we are quite simple

This is the first what you need to know about men.
Every time you start fantasizing, trying to imaginewhat does a man wantcome back to that thought. You shouldn't complicate things.Everything is pretty simple.

The main thing a man wants in a relationship is to make his woman happy. Please her. Wear on your hands. Give flowers. Watch her sincere emotions at such moments. Understand that he is the cause of all this. And it fills him up.

1. We want to be protectors

An important point whichneed to know about men: This need has been in our DNA for thousands of years. She awakens in us early childhood. As boys, we want to be knights in shining armor and superheroes rescuing girls from the neighborhood bullies.

As we grow up, this desire remains. But now it is no longer expressed in physical protection, but in material. For example, towhen you want a new dress. When you are sick. When you break a nail. When you are scared or worried about something.

Make sure you always feel completely safe. Therefore, if you want to compliment a man, say that you feel safe next to him. And you will notice how he will immediately be inspired, and a light will light up in his eyes.

deep understanding inner peace lesson No. 27 of the training called "Psychology: honor and dignity in a man's way" is devoted to men.

1. We don't want to see a lot of makeup on a woman's face.

Every man appreciates good makeup. Undoubtedly, if cosmetics are applied skillfully and, most importantly, in moderation, it looks beautiful.But a lot of women obviously overdo it.

Well, who said that a lot of makeup is good?Has any man ever said that you need more makeup?

Many layers of expensive cosmetics on a woman's face - this is not at allwhat men want. It is important for us that a woman attracts, but at the same time remains herself, and not be like a Barbie. We need real, "live" women.

We also really like to wake up early and watch our beloved sleeping sweetly next to us. How she wakes up. How gently he gets out of bed in a beautiful T-shirt and shorts that act as pajamas. How he tries to fight hair tangled during the night.

Agree that in such morning moments a woman is clearly far from the ideal of beauty. But still we like it. Because waking up from sleep is one of the few moments when we can see her “real” and so fragile, defenseless, tender.

1. Sometimes we don't really know what we want

This is another point thatwomen need to know about men. Yes, we also have periods of uncertainty. And yes, we can doubt it too.

“Darling, do you want children?”
– If yes, how much? Two, three?
Where would you like us to live in 10 years?
How many rooms will there be in the house we will build?
What color will the back door of our house be?

For women, such questions are quite natural. Such trifles are usually thought out with you adolescence. And that's okay.And it’s also normal that men most often don’t think about it. We don't care what color the door is. The main thing is that it be .. good ... with a reliable lock.

Laying everything out in advance on the shelves is not somethingwhat men want.
Yes, we can plan. But usually it's about more serious things. Where to go to study. Where to express yourself: business, work. How much money to earn to provide for your future family.
But all this is semi-abstract.

Yes, we have goals, dreams and ambitions. But we don't know how things will turn out in the future. We know for sure that we want a beloved woman nearby who will support and recognize her Man in each of us.

So if you can't find outwhat does a man wantdon't push him. He just hasn't made up his mind yet. Or in the process of setting a goal. Everything has its time.

1. We are not going to deceive you

Everyone lies. There are no ideal men and women in this regard.
H What else do women need to know about men?That we all purposefully want to deceive you is a widely held, but erroneous, belief.

Yes, it often happens that men lie. We do this because we want our loved one to be happy. It would seem that this sounds somewhat paradoxical. But this is a fact.

It all starts with little things like:
“Honey, I think I need to lose some weight…”
Did you like yesterday's performance at the theatre?
“You don’t mind if Tanya and Sasha come to dinner with us, do you?”

Think for yourself what your reaction will be if he answers:
Yes, you need to lose weight!
- No, I didn't like it!
“I’m against it, I don’t want to communicate with them!”

That's right - such answers will be at least insulting to hear. And he understands it. Therefore, he begins to deceive and say:
- No, I like you anyway - you have a beautiful figure.
Yes, the show was amazing.
“Of course, let them come in. I missed them so much!

This is where it all starts. At first he does this so as not to offend you. And then it just becomes a habit. And you don’t have time to look back, as he has already pretty lied. Although initially I did not want anything bad. After all, he believes that he does what he must.

Lying to your beloved is not somethingwhat men want. But we can do it so as not to upset her.
I'm not saying that all the blame falls on the women. What I'm trying to say is that it might be your reaction to his truthful words.

Remember how you reacted to his truth before? Offended? Did you cry? Did you leave? Therefore, he changes his communication tactics to one that will be better for you. From his point of view.

Also, remember yourself. Have you never done the same to your beloved?

If you do not discuss these points even in the early stages of the relationship, the lies will manifest themselves in any case and will only accumulate every year.

This is about lies in general. If it concerns deception in the form of relationships with other women behind your back, then this is a completely different situation, which we previously considered in the article. .

1. We don't like it when women mention their exes.

Everything is extremely simple here: next to your man, you should not talk about past relationships.
My advice: forget about past relationships when you have a new one. Delete all phones and contacts. Just take it out of your life.

We don't like being compared to other men. Especially with those who have already been in your life before.

Information of this kind is not at allwhat a man needs to know. Talking about the former is definitely not.
If he is interested in it, then you gave a reason to show interest in your past earlier.

1. Sometimes we don't mean what we say

It happens that the “wrong” words fly out of the male mouth by themselves. Words that can offend and even seriously hurt.Yes, we can be impulsive too. Give in to emotions. Get angry. At such moments, not everyone is able to control themselves.

Do not rush to conclusions. You don't have to answer the same.Give him some time to cool down. Very soon he will understand how insulting the words he said could sound. And if offending you is not somethingwhat does a man wantHe immediately tries to explain himself.

If he says he didn't mean what he said, then he is. No need to cling to "Freudian slips". Just trust his explanation. AND good advice- just learn to trust your man by default. If he is worthy of such faith.

1. We love when the head of the beloved is on our shoulder

This is another indisputable fact thatwomen need to know about men.
Wherever you are with him - in bed, on the bus, at the cinema - rest on his shoulder more often. The feeling that your shoulder serves as support for the woman you love is akin to a man's need to protect her.

To be needed - that's itwhat men want. All. Without exception.

1. We express our love in different ways

In order not to wind yourself up once again, need to know about menone more feature.

There are others

Many of us believe that we don't have to say anything at all about our feelings.If we associate our life with a woman, this already means that we consider her beautiful, sexy, smart, funny, and so on. Otherwise, why waste your time on it?If he invests time (and possibly money) in you, then this already speaks of his feelings.

1. We need to know that we are valued

No, I'm not saying that every action a man performs should be responded with praise.Just tell him from time to time how proud you are of him and how important what he does to you.

This is how we come to understand that we are valued. And that's exactly whatwhat men wantfrom their women.

Once again briefly about the main

As men, we always try to do as much for our women as possible. And we understand that the women in our lives put in just as much effort, maybe even more.

We want to be good boyfriends, husbands, fathers and sons. And it is important for us that the people we care about are proud of us. Especially our other halves.

Very few of us talk about it out loud often.
Many - never at all.

And those are the things thatwomen need to know about mento understand them.I hope now you will be able to perceive men exactly as they are.

Your coach and just a friend -
Yaroslav Samoilov.

Most interesting articles Yaroslav Samoilov:

All women dream of becoming men at least for a moment, to find out what men say about women. This interest is mutual, because we want to know all the keys to building a happy relationship or to possess an adored object.

But as they say, you won’t fit into your head, and everything else is our speculation or the opinions of psychologists. However, statistics and reviews of women who have been working among men for a very long time confirm that men are very fond of gossiping about women.

Fortunately, today there are a lot of forums and the stronger sex is not shy about discussing topics that concern us, women. Probably for the good of us, so that we do not step on the widely encountered rake.

Discuss appearance women are not peculiar to men, except if he greatly irritates them or causes desires below the waist. Crazy fashion trends, such as pants with a mat down to the knees, our Adams do not welcome at all. But a cheeky uniform can be condemned for public place, but it will not cause a clear rejection for obvious reasons.

Men are annoyed by female chatter without an address. Sometimes it happens that we just want to speak out and do not expect advice, only sympathy. If this tirade drags on, then not every man, even a loving one, is ready to be an excellent vest. Although we sometimes have to endure when a man talks a lot.

The dream of a woman's habitat for many men corresponds German proverb: kitchen, church, children . However, this is the dream of insecure owners who are afraid of losing their property.

To this end, they first strongly beg us to dine with them for company, and when we gain a dozen extra pounds, they complain about our domesticated appearance. Dear ladies, our husbands are discussing our excess weight very correct, but someone else's lady in uniforms will simply be called a cow.

Men are annoyed by women who overly pay attention to their appearance, but completely forget about cleanliness in the kitchen and the freshness of men's shirts.

Again, our fashion to build up nails, eyelashes (let's go around the chest - none of the men will refuse a chic decollete) sincerely surprises the stronger sex. One acquaintance called his "extended" wife a cyborg. Men like neat, neat, moderately made-up ladies.

Hercules genuinely fears and shuns women who try to appear stronger than them. Masculine, adopting male habits, swearing and smoking in a crowded place, like real grooms (let me be forgiven by representatives of this honest profession) - this is an exaggerated image.

Even a small part of such a picture does not guarantee that tender words will be poured into her address.

Oh girls, don't make your companions call you pussy or bunny. It's one thing when a man calls you affectionately own initiative. Worse, when your request will be discussed at bachelor parties, cause nausea and be compensated in communication with a woman who does not need it.

Apollo in love will never tell his wife or companion that he does not like something in her because of the fear of losing the jewel. But if he is sincerely annoyed by some trait, it is not surprising that all his entourage will know about it.

Brazenly stolen by me, where I will not say. In short - that's what aunts wrote on one forum about bad habits their men. If anyone has something to add - wellcome

Mine sneezes loudly too! But at the same time, he also screams and stomps his feet :) The people around him are very scared and jump straight away from him. How many times did I make comments to him, but he likes it, damn it. He also sits in the toilet for 40 minutes. Take your laptop with you and you won't get it. I'm already dancing under the toilet door. And he somehow fell asleep in the toilet !!! Can you imagine a picture? I was very tired at work, and then I drank a little. I woke up in the middle of the night - he's gone! I went around all the rooms - no! I was even scared. And then I hear snoring from the toilet :) That's chuchundra :)

And he also pokes toilet paper everywhere, as if there is a shortage in the city, and in the car, and in the pocket of a down jacket. I can't shop!

And I weaned my nose picking, you know how. When I saw that he was doing this, she pretended that I was picking too, and then I wiped it on his sweater :)))) Of course, I didn’t actually wipe anything, it’s a joke of course, but it helped :)))) Because he started screaming, fuuuu what are you doing :)))

And I somehow met a guy (28 years old), came to a restaurant, made an order, and he started talking, he spoke like a man possessed, it even seemed to me that he did not have time to take air into his lungs :) And when they brought food, he interrupted the story and began to eat without raising his head (as if I was not around at all :)), and he diligently stuffed everything into his both cheeks and shook his head like crazy. I watched this picture and, in order to stop myself from laughing, I crawled under the table with clenched teeth. Although, probably, he would not have noticed :)) And I also remember how, because of my joke, he rolled with laughter, and it was a bearish rzhach smoothly flowing into silence, i.e. I see him in front of me with an open mouth and rolling eyes, but the sounds are no longer audible, only something periodically similar to a barely perceptible "gyyyyyaaa-ah-ah-ah" :)))

And mine loves to look into the microwave, especially when the grill is cooking and the food is spinning :) It's a joke, he takes a stool, sits down and looks out the window of the microwave, like a movie is being shown there :))

And mine, just don’t laugh too much, pees at home only while sitting (so as not to describe the toilet), and then wipes his penis with a piece of paper, while as if “squeezing out” it like a tube of paste)))))))))) )) Already 3 years together, but I still find it funny))))))))))))))

And mine, every night, at exactly 1.30 wakes up and goes to terrorize the refrigerator. And he doesn’t even turn on the light, he eats everything that comes to hand and doesn’t even cut anything if it’s a big piece (a stick of sausage or cheese, a piece or a piece of meat), and in the morning I open the refrigerator, and there are only nibbles ... And at the same time he remembers nothing, everything hawala with eyes closed like in a dream...

Hello everyone! and mine is in general a whole problem! it is placed on pantyhose, it’s just awful, he constantly asks me to wear them, during sex he only lowers them to the knee, while constantly touching them and sometimes even forgive me for wearing them sleeping! it's ok pls help! :)

and mine only sleeps in a hat.

I remembered that even before I start cooking, mine tries raw meat, maybe eat half a kilo, then there’s nothing to cook from, as in a joke-Today we have pilaf without meat ... and without rice). Before, I ate raw dumplings , but I don’t do them now, I wrote about this earlier.

Help!!! My husband never throws away anything! I started to audit here, threw out a lot of things, and then I found a box with transport tickets for the last three years. I wanted to throw it away, but he was offended: he said that these were all the tickets he used to go on dates with me and he would keep them forever! He even saved the empty cake box we ate two years ago as a token of reconciliation after a fight! That's the kind of romantic he is. I love him very, very much, but what should I do with all these boxes and papers ???

) And my evening when he relaxes drinking beer .. The degree of intoxication - looks out - Show me the pussy! Well, show me... ooooh! Passes by, takes off his panties - shakes - "Do you want to show you pussy!!" And so the whole evening .. past me right here in the toilet to piss a beer ... and every time he shows me pussy .. In the morning - "OH I'm sick with a hangover !!! I showed you pussy yesterday? YES? " And in the closet every morning like a sheep! looks at things .. and asks - "Where are my trousers ..? Did you shift again ???" the same for a box of socks! DOES NOT see!

And I have one young bachelor who still invented funny way wash socks. In a bottle from under water (6 liters) is poured hot water and a couple of spoons of powder, and then a closed bottle is thrown into the trunk and he rides with it during the day. He says that then it remains only to rinse ...

What else is there for women to talk about? Of course, about the most important thing in their lives - about men! You have no idea how much women talk and think about men! There are as many opinions as there are women in the world. Each has its own thoughts, addressed, most often, to one, the most important man. There are several directions of these thoughts, the only way, probably, to name the main topic of conversations about men.

There are no real men

The real men have gone! women think. At this time, she does a variety of things - they carry bags home, repair cabinets, plant tomatoes in the country, twist three-liter cans, even put asphalt on the roads. And at the same time, they, gathering with their friends, discuss how difficult it has become for them to live in the world. How can men be, if women have taken away from men almost everything that was previously inaccessible to the weaker sex. Yes, far from all men know how to make stools, repair plumbing, sing serenades under the window of their beloved and give gifts beautifully. Many cannot earn for all family expenses. And there are individual specimens that succumbed to the green serpent. Here I really want to ask, weren't there such people before, in the 20th, in the 19th centuries? Were there not weak, stingy, stupid, drunkards? There were, of course. But were there a great many noble knights? Yes, just like now, there are only a few of them! So it turns out that the men have not died out, they are the same as always. It's just that women have become smarter and more legible, they have learned to formulate their claims, write books and blogs. So there were more conversations, and men - as always.

They are all thugs

It is also commonly believed that women think about men that they are womanizer. All men breathe unevenly when they see long legs, short skirts, and already on the first date they dream about sex. This is not just a woman's opinion, all girls are taught this by their mothers in order to prevent the worst thing that can happen to their daughters. Well, who told you that they are all like that? There are, of course, men with disabilities, but mostly men are just as shy to pay attention to a girl, they are just as afraid of rejection, like the female sex, they also dream of a clean and bright love. It's just that women and men have different ways of expressing their feelings. Men are more stingy with emotions, they are more silent than girls, they are more worried about what is happening in themselves, which is why they get sick more often. And all glances at skirts and legs are caused by a simple interest in opposite sex.

They need models

By the way, another myth is that men love long-legged, thin, blondes, with a big ... rich world in front. Huge mistake! All men cannot be the same, and many of them love curvaceous, slender women, but with forms. If a man loves his chosen one, then it does not matter to him at all 60 cm in her waist or 65, her breast size is third or first. And about huge breasts in general very often they speak negatively. loving man can be fascinated by a woman's smile, eyes, the ability to support and understand. But about the stomach and the path to the soul of a man - pure truth. If a man is full, then he will be more willing to work around the house. He will never go out to dinner at a restaurant where he might meet his wife's charming competitor who can't cook.

They love fools

And the most disgusting delusion of women is that men love fools in order to appear smart against their background. Worth remembering bright women who moved their men to brilliant creations and discoveries. For example, who would Salvador Dali be if he hadn't met a very smart Russian woman named Gala?

Men's opinion

And no less interesting is what men think about women. They believe that women only need money from them, that they are not understood and are not left alone, inventing more and more new things. But this is also a big misconception! Women have greater vitality than men, the ability to survive. And while men think, women do everything to make the family live better. And if you add a big lexicon and the number of words that nature intended for them to speak per day (and this is much more than that of a man), then everything that men call “she got me completely” will turn out.

In general, it is difficult to list everything that women think about men. Men say all sorts of things about women. But both of them cannot live without each other! After all, we are two halves. And in these contradictions and disputes, love is stronger and passion is stronger!

Director of the Vladimir dating agency "Me and You", family psychologist, consultant on interpersonal relations Elena Kuznetsova named phrases that will not leave any man indifferent.

According to the specialist, "kneading" should be done immediately on - "lower" and "upper".

1. "You're the best because"...

Any phrase in superlative form that begins with the words: "You are the best" or "You are the best" will have the desired effect. It is important, however, to remember that abstract praise is a road to nowhere. "just like that", you risk. The partner will stop responding both to you and to your requests. So the advice to women is to praise your beloved, but for the cause.

“Everyone likes to be praised. When pleasant words they say just like that, you get used to the fact that you are the best, and this is a priori. Praise in this case is meaningless. So, in order to stimulate the partner for further exploits, ”says Kuznetsova.

The examples are simple. A woman might say, “Thank you for buying me this dress. You the best man!”, or “, did not skimp on a fur coat for me!”, Or: “You cook so deliciously - you are the best!”, “How great you are doing housework - you have golden hands. You are the best!".

Hearing such words, expressed in excellent form and with admiration, a man really feels like "the very best." And when, in addition, they explain to him why he is so wonderful, the representative of the stronger sex, maintain the status of the best and. It sounds a little harsh, but action-oriented praise develops a Pavlovian dog reflex in a man, forcing him to perform new feats in the name of beautiful lady. For the lady, in turn, it is important not only to stimulate her beloved to these accomplishments, but also from the end result: “I happy woman because I have you, and you are taking me to the sea."

Another point that is important in this case. Praising a man, a woman needs from time to time at the end of the tirade to carefully translate “arrows on herself”, to say something like:.

“It is important that a man does not get fed up with compliments and does not move to the stage: “I am a star!”. Focus on exactly what: . beautiful woman I need a beautiful kokoshnik, and you are the same hero who made this kokoshnik for me, because I am beautiful with you, ”explains the psychologist.

2. "You are my protector"

Phrases like: “You are my helper”, “You are my protector”, “You are my amulet” and so on demonstrate the importance of a man in the eyes of a woman and. A man in this case feels, firstly, a “male”. Secondly, he has the thought that a woman will disappear without him, and that his partner needs him, because without him she is a weak and useless creature.

“Hooks must be done, you need to“ anchor ”your man:“ I am your wife (girlfriend), and I think about you, ”explains a specialist in interpersonal relations.

At the same time, Kuznetsova notes that it is not necessary to constantly write the same phrase. With the variability of the text, the meaning should, however, remain unchanged: “I miss you”, “I think about you”, “May you have the best day”.

These SMS, sent at regular intervals, are a kind of reminder of yourself and that a man is important to you. A partner can, but he will definitely smile when reading them.

4. "You are the best lover"

Here it is impossible not to recall Freud's statement that. For this reason, the “lower chakra” is either nothing, or good, very good. The latter is preferable. Praise your partner before sex, during sex and after sex: "I feel very good with you",. “Too much” in this case does not happen, because at such moments yours. And I am grateful to the woman for the fact that she appreciates this “masculinity” of his.

5. Curtseys towards relatives and friends

When communicating with a man, a woman should know his interests and preferences, ranging from favorite things in the wardrobe, hobbies and ending with people he values. So that a lady should sometimes, and his clothes, and friends, and relatives - mother, first of all. A man will be grateful to you for the fact that you respect his microcosm and the environment that enters into it.

If you have questions for psychologist Elena Kuznetsova, you can ask them by writing a letter to email address editions of "AiF-Vladimir": [email protected] .